ESCAPE

Chapter 48

HARRY

'Do you mind telling me what all of that was about?', asked Lou and I simply shook my head at her.

'Harry, are you alright?', she asked noticing my frustration.

'I'm fine', I lied.

'No you're not', she said sitting next to me and I hung my head low.

'I don't have the answer for anything that you want to ask me', I said and she put an arm around me.

'I thought you wanted this', she said.

'So did I', I replied.

'What changed it then?', she asked.

My stupid fantasy of making her mine.

'I thought I could do this', I said.

'And you still can', she said with an encouraging hug.

I hated what I was feeling right now, I hated the fact that I had made Val cry and lose hope.

'Harry, you know you can tell me anything right?', she asked gently and I nodded.

'Then tell me, love', she said and I sniffed to hold in the tears that threatened to fall.

'I made the same mistake, Lou', I said softly.

'What mistake?', she asked confused.

'You know, the one where I break my heart over something impossible', I said and looked up at the ceiling.

'Oh love', she said and quickly engulfed me in a hug.

'I keep doing it', I gasped.

'I don't know why that's wrong at the moment', she said looking at me.

'Because I don't know whether I can keep her', I said looking at her.

'Val?', she asked and I nodded.

'You love her?', she asked.

'I don't know yet, but I really like her', I said.

'Well you have a funny way of showing it then', she said wryly and I couldn't help but smile at her tone.

'What are you so afraid of?', she asked.

'I don't want what happened to Zayn and Nova to happen to us', I admitted.

Lou let out a deep sigh and put an arm around me.

'We don't know that', she said.

'Everyone keeps telling me to be careful and make up my mind', I said.

'What does your heart tell you?', she asked.

'It tells me to fucking kiss her', I said wryly and she burst out laughing.

'You're not helping', I groaned.

'I'm sorry but your heart might have to wait that one out', she said out of breath.

'Well enlighten me then', I said.

'I think you should finish this fake show for now and then you can take the risk', she said and I looked at her confused.

'The risk being for once stop following everyone's bloody rules and make some of your own', she said.

'Yeah last time I tried, it almost killed her', I said.

'Not literally you idiot. God! This is why I worry about you more than the rest of the boys', she said placing her hand on her head.

I rolled my eyes at her and fell back into bed.

'I meant to take a risk with your heart', she said.

'Well we all know how that ends !', I exclaimed raising my arms for a dramatic effect.

'But I bet Valentina is different', she said and I remained silent for that.

Of course she was different, she wasn't like the other women I had dated. She was real, she didn't know the world that I lived in, she didn't know how vulnerable I could make her if I opened up to her. I on the other half would be in danger as well, for I had no clue about her or her demons.

I guess we were both dangerous for each other .