Mistakes - Matthew Daddario (completed)

the struggles of a nobody #2

For me, life hit its lowest point during the years when my anxiety and depression period hit its all time high.

Every day was a long struggle. Each choice a never ending internal battle that nobody could see but I could feel, lingering and taunting me.

The transition from graduation, to entering college scared me shitless because I was truly alone with my demons. Sure Dylan was here every step of the way and was only down the hall or a phone call away; but he wasn't in my head with me, he could never fully understand the extent to what I endured.

He, nor anybody else would ever understand the two voices inside of me, both with totally different opinions. Anxiety screaming that I have to get up and do stuff or I'm destined to fail in life, and then depression on the other side telling me that none of it even matters and I should stay in bed all day.

I was ways ridiculously stressed out about everything all the time but also not really caring about anything at all. It was two totally opposites pulling my mind apart, and that's really exhausting; especially as no one would ever fully understand.

Depression made me not care about anything at all but anxiety wanted me to care about everything too much; but no one would or could know because I hid it.

Only Dylan truly knew, whether he understood or not.

But unlike my now dysfunctional family and unlike the "friends" I had once had during junior year, he was there.

He helped me fight my demons, look for the happiness and good in the negatives and he stood by my side; he was there.

Dylan is probably the sole reason I'm still here fighting and living. College was tough, but with him there it was bearable and I survived, better yet, I found myself.

During the college years, Dylan found his path in acting, starting with his YouTube channel and then auditions for a TV show remake of a popular movie and then leads in other movies.

But no matter how busy he got, he always made time for me in ensuring I was okay and not neglecting my mental health. The best way he did this was in introducing me to his world.

He took me along to a Teen Wolf reading and was part of the reason I got my first big break alongside him on the show.

He came along to every audition that followed, whether it was acting or modelling.

He was part of the reason I recovered.

He was the reason I went from a nobody; to a somebody.