Shattered

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I kept glancing at Cole from the corners of my eyes as I was busy stuffing his and my clothes into a huge duffle bag which I had brought to the hospital. And like I had expected, he was completely ignoring me though I'd already tried to initiated a small conversation with him for a few times as if I wasn't even there.

I then sighed tiredly.

Right now, he was currently sitting on one corners of the bed --- the one which was closer to the wall --- with his knees pulled up and pressed against his chest. And, though his face was currently looked nonchalant, I knew he was actually just wanted to cry. However, despite I actually had knew what the reason was, I tried to ignore it nonetheless.

"Are you hungry?" I asked, turning to him fully. He glanced at me with that same pair of teary eyes, his lips were trembling and he frantically shook his head before hastily breaking his eyes contact.

"N-no..." I heard him whispered for the first time that day. Looking away from me, he then wrapped his skinny arms tightly around his knees as he tried to shrink himself as tiny as he possibly could. He looked scared as hell, and if before this I was so proud of myself if he acted like this around me; well I am not now. In fact, I'm actually very embarrassed of myself. He was acting like an abused puppy who never seem to receive any proper care and love from human, and I cursed at myself upon the thought of it.

Why he's being like this? Yeah, me. I'm the reason why he looked so shattered and scared.

"Are you thirsty?" I tried asking again, but this time, however, he didn't respond. He just stared at his feet as fresh beads of tear felt down his cheeks like rain. I gulped hardly. "...hey".

"I want my baby..." was his only answer. He wiped his tears with the back of his hand as soft sound of sobs escaped from his lips. I wanted to hug him though, but he didn't seem to need any from me anyway. Hell. He didn't even want to look at me in the eyes for too long, let alone letting me to pull him into an embrace from a man who had broke him though I was aching to do that actually. I wanted him, but I had to be careful and steady.

Give him time.

I stared at him for the longest minute.

Underneath that blond bang, I'd noticed how hard he was trying to calm himself down. He bitted his bottom lip as hard as he could until at some point, it was almost bleeding. Quickly rushed in, I then climbed on the bed and I hastily grabbed his face softly. Yet, not even a second had passed, he already pulled away from my grasp and he got off the bed as quickly as he could. His breath was heavy and rapid as he was looking at me --- both knuckles pressed against his chest as he kept stepping backwards until his back hit against the wall.

"L-leave me alone..." he said harshly through heavy, sharp breath. "...leave me the fuck alone, you filthy monster!" he then yelled at the top of his lung. Judging from his current expression, one could simply tell that he looked like he would collapse anytime soon because of pressure, and upon the thought, I got off the bed and tried to reach him.

"Cool down, Cole..." I calmly said, though I'm actually shaking nervously inside. I walked closer towards him, but every time I did, he would just kept walking away --- further and further --- until I could barely touch him anymore. "...I wouldn't hurt you, I promise".



Only if he would believe that.



"I said leave me the fuck alone!" he screamed. Then, he started to cry. He was crying so loud that it started to draw the attentions of his family's members who were waiting outside. They rushed inside, and when his mother wrapped her arms around him; he immediately melted into the warm embrace.

His father then turned to me.

"What's wrong, Alpha?" he asked, concerned.

I gulped.

"I-I don't know..." I replied hesitantly. Should I tell them that I'm the reason that their son had turned like this? I don't think so. What if they forbid us to meet after this? No. Of course I don't want that. "...he's acting like that all of a sudden..." I then added nervously.

Mr. Ryan then sighed heavily.

"Yeah, the doctor had told us about him being traumatized. And I'm so sorry for the lost of your baby and my grandson, Alpha..." he smiled small. There was a clear sadness filled his face, and once again, I felt guilty. I wanted to just tell him everything, but I am scared.

"Y-yeah, thanks..." I said finally.

I then continued to tidy everything up as his mother kept calming Cole down. Once in a while, I would glance at him; only to see that he was already sleeping soundly on his mother's lap after a few minutes later. His face looked peaceful though, and the way he was clenching tightly on his mother's shirt was a clear sign that he felt really safe with her.

I swallowed a lump of saliva in my throat.

"Alpha, can Cole stays with us for a few days?" Mrs. Ryan said as she dragged her fingertips through Cole's soft blond hair.

I then stared at the petite boy whose face currently looked like he didn't have any problem in this world when in fact, he's actually the most pressured one right now.

Was he really felt that peaceful when he was around his mother? Well he looked like it though, and if living with his family for a while could heal his sadness slightly, then why not?

"Sure..." I answered finally, though I actually didn't have any heart to agree. I wanted him to be with me now, but what's the point if he kept crying and avoiding every time I come close? Of course, that would only led him more into depression, and I didn't want that. After all, he seemed to look much happier when he was with his family --- even if he was just sleeping there not doing or talking about anything with them. "...how long will you take him?".

"Max is three days. We wouldn't take him for too long..." she replied swiftly. "...we really miss him though".

I forced a small smile.

"Well then, okay. You guys can take him".

"Thank you so much, Alpha".

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