Chapter eighteen//screaming

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Tyler walked into the shower crying. The water was filling up the tub. Tyler sat down in the burning water. Tyler hissed as he sat down. It was burning but he had to. Tyler was dirty. Tyler was a dirty whore! He had to scrub it away. Tyler scrubbed and clawed at his arms and stumack. It didn't work. The feeling of him was still there. Tyler turned up the heat of the water and clenched his jaw. "I deserve it!" Tyler whispered and laid down more. There was three quiet knocks on the door. "I'm going grocery shopping, wanna come?" Josh asked. "Uhm.. no." Tyler said. "Okay, I'll be back in an hour." Josh said and walked away. Tyler got up as he understood it wouldn't work. He sat down on the bathroom floor. Tears sliding down his cheeks. Tyler clawed at his arms as he sat there. Tyler stood up and looked at himself. He looked disgusting. Blue and purple marks all over his neck and jaw. Tyler clawed at them too. They didn't go away. Tyler took a towel and scrubbed. Nothing worked. Tyler slid down the wall again.

Why did this have to happen to me?

Because you deserve it.

Tyler turned around. Who was that? "H-hello?" Tyler whispered with a low shaky voice.

You're going insane Tyler.

"No I'm not." Tyler whispered and closed his eyes.

No one loves you!

"Josh does!" Tyler yelled.

No one loved a slut!

No one even likes a slut!



Just die!

You're not worth anything!


You don't deserve anything Tyler!

Dirty slut!

Josh is probably having sex with someone else!

Filthy whore!

No one likes you!


You can't even be straight!

That's how fucked up you are!


Your mom left because she hates you!


Everybody hates you!


You even hate yourself!


Your dad is drinking to forget you!






Tyler grabbed his hair and screamed. He kicked and hit the brick wall. Tyler tried to choke himself. But let go when his lungs were screaming. "I can't even fucking kill myself!" Tyler yelled and walked to the medicine cabinet. He opened it and looked at the big bottle. Benzodiazepines.


I'm sorry if this chapter is kind of a mess. Comment if you don't understand and I'll answer. ^^


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