Darling, You'll Be Okay// Completed

18-Happy Little Pill✅

"Ray, sweetie. I'm about to leave" I heard dad tell me as he shook me awake.

"N-n-no!" I said having a few tears slip out.

"D-don't g-go! You promised to never leave. I knew you couldn't keep it you tour a lot" I said now a blubbering mess. I knew that's not what he meant by never leaving but I just I'm afraid I'm going to loose him and I don't want that.

"Baby girl" he said soothingly before he paused. "That's not what I meant you known that" he said with I sigh.

"Y-yeah. I-I can't loose you" I told him letting my emotions take over.

"Princess. Please don't do this. I have to leave soon. But it's so hard knowing your in this state of vulnerability.

"I'm sorry daddy" I said trying to get myself together a little knowing as soon as he left I would be crying.

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Dad left a few hours ago. Danielle got me up for school, Well I was already up. I didn't plan on going to school today though. I just can't. When she dropped me off in front of the school building, I waited for her to leave and as soon as she did I bolted off towards the nearby park. But before I did I caught a glimpse of a girl with short silver and black hair wearing a band shirt and bracelets. Finally, someone with a decent music taste. 'Maybe I can make a friend' I thought to myself as I neared the park.

I pulled my headphones and phone out and hit shuffle and waited for the first song to start playing. I sat down on one of the swings, listening to Cinderblock Garden playing through my headphones.

As it got to the line :
"I know it gets hard for you to stay but do you really want to throw it all away"
I felt tears slide down my cheeks once again leaving the salty wet concoction to dry on my cheeks later. I knew what I wanted, I knew I didn't want to be here anymore, but did I really want it? Lately the only reason I've been trying to stop is for Kellin and Dad.

I know they both wouldn't like if they knew what a mess I've made again, but I'm trying it's just hard to stop.

I just sat here crying and listening to music till I had to walk back home. Danielle said she couldn't pick me up today, but never gave me a reason why she couldn't.

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It was now about 4 pm and I should have been home an hour ago. I stated walking back home. I wanted to be anywhere but here...... Scratch that I just wanted to be with dad, I knew that wasn't an option though.

As soon as I walked through the front door Danielle came from out of the kitchen yelling something at me. I couldn't hear her over the loveliness that is Troy Sivan singing Happy Little Pill.

I really didn't want to deal with her so I just walked up to my and laid in bed. About 15 minutes later I got a text from dad.

From Dad: where did you go? Danielle said you skipped school? And why did you ignore her?

To Dad: yeah I skipped and I went to the park. Why the fuck would she care? She was the one yelling at me when I walked into the house.

From Dad: Watch your language young lady! she cares because she loves you, she calls you her daughter ya know. She loves you ray. Please don't do this, I won't hesitate to come home if Danielle calls me again crying because you acted out.

To Dad: She won't have to worry about me "acting out" again anyways! I wanna stay with grandma and grandpa till you get back!

From Dad: Ray.... Please can we not do this? Just try and get along with her. I love both of you too much to loose either of you over this.

To Dad: No! I wasn't acting out! You just fucking left me for tour! I won't see you for months and she sent me off to school? I feel like shit, I didn't want to go! I told her I didn't want to go and she just sends me off! She didn't even fucking care enough to make time to pick me up! 30 minute fucking walk! What the hell did she do all day that was more important? I don't like her!

~ mildly triggering~
From Dad: Ray! Just fucking stop! I can't do this....Your being pathetic!

To Dad: i know I'm pathetic, didn't have to tell me "dad" I can't do this either, I'm done! Have been for a while!

From Dad: don't do this! I swear to fucking god Ray! Baby please. You've been doing so good. I'm sorry.

To Dad: That's what you and Kellin think.

I locked my phone ignoring the rest of dad's texts as I sat down on the cold tile of the bathroom floor. My phone on my right buzzing non-stop, razor in my right hand and my left arm laid out with my sleeve rolled up.

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I couldn't right it after that part, :( I'm sorry. Iv felt like shit all day, then at youth it was one of the last times I would see my friend before she goes off to college so yeah sorry :( but new character next chapter and she was slightly in this one of you couldn't tell. FHANKS itsnoelleyyy