The Worst Things in Life Come Free to us|L.R.H

14- the strong one.

"wait one sec, Calum's ringing," Clary gets up from beside me and walks outside. 

i sigh, she obviously doesn't want me to hear, in case something triggers me, or makes me upset. 

like i'm some little kid watching a sex scene and my parents need to cover my eyes. 

don't get me wrong, it's nice that they  care, I've never particularly appreciated that side of things, but i make the thought turn me tolerable. 

i guess i'm just so used to nobody being there, no one caring, then when it comes my way i simply don't see it.

but the thing is, i'm just waiting for the day i say something or do something wrong and it all comes crashing down, leaving me crushed in the rubble, stuck and never to get out. 

Clary walks through the door, the phone still to her ear. 

"Calum wants to talk to you," she says, detaching the phone from her ear and holding it out to me. 

reluctantly i take it. 

"hello?" i ask shyly into the mobile. 

"hi Tess, it's Calum!" his voice sounds odd through the phone, but i force myself to push the thought aside as i listen for information. 

"hi," i mumble back, as i pull the fluffy grey blanket closer around my shoulders. 

"you okay?" he asks, his voice sounding slightly concerned, i tell him i'm fine and ask how Luke's doing. 

his voice is anxious through the phone.  

"well, he told us about his parents, and that you knew already and stuff, but umm- basically Rob and him got into a small fight, and err- well he's broken two ribs.." 

i gasp.

"that's not all.." shit. shit. shit. "he took a blow to the head, and he's in- umm, in a coma.." i feel tears blur my eyes. "Tessa, don't worry, he's expected to be out of it in a week or two, he'll be  fine, okay?" 

i try to nod even though i know he can't see me. 

at first i'm just overwhelmed by sadness, but then something else begins to bubble in my chest and i think it's anger, how could somebody want to hurt something as beautiful as Luke; and what has he ever done to the world?

he doesn't deserve it. 

"Tessa?" he asks, his tone cautious, i know he knows that Luke still means a great deal to me and i love him for it. 

"can i come see him? please, just for a while," i almost beg and i know i sound sappy, and i didn't think anybody would ever be able to bring a side like that out of me. 

but something's different with Luke, we understand each other, whether it's the fact we suffer from the same illnesses, or we're just as messed up as the other, i don't know, but something pulls me to him and it's unbreakable, i just regret the last time i saw him was when i ran away, and probably broke his heart. 

i hear Calum asking the boys, obviously having attempted to cover the phone so i can't hear, but failing miserably. 

"i don't know.." i hear calum say followed by more muffled conversation. "she can't break down guys, Luke would kill us, i don't think i'd be good for her," Calum says again, and i get his point, but at the same time i want to punch him. 

"it'll only do her more damage not coming, she wants to see him, and she's obviously worried," 

i almost want to scream a thank you to Michael for saying that, but i remain quiet.