A Place In This World

All To Myself

Josh's POV

I don't patronize, I realize I'm losing

And this is my real life.

I could not get her out of my head. No matter how hard I tried, it just wasn't possible.

Ever since I had laid eyes on her, exactly two weeks and fourteen hours ago, my mind was focusing on her. I had tried texting her numerous times, I had called and left I don't know how many voicemails. But each time I reached out there was no reply.

I wasn't sleeping. I wasn't eating right. I couldn't focus on even the simplest things.

I was in the studio trying to write and get my mind on a different topic. I had suddenly developed an anxiety that she didn't really like me. She probably moved away to India to marry her husband that was some rich prince. All I wanted was her. I saw her face in every crowd. Heard her voice every morning.

I needed her.

The sound of my phone interrupted my thoughts. I quickly snatched it off the table hoping it was Amanda.

It was Taylor. Disapointed, I read the text message.

"Hey! Up for a Prado run?" It said.

"Sure. Be there in ten," I replied.

I huffed and got up.

This habit is always so hard to break

When I arrived in the café, Taylor was sitting at our usual table, looking out the window. I walked towards her. I hoped she wasn't still mad at me. I still didn't even know what I did.

"Hey Taylor," I greeted. She turned her head towards me.

"Oh hi," she said with a light smile.

I decided to cut right to the chase.

"So, you still mad at me?" I asked.

"Oh god. Don't remind me of that night," she rubbed her temple. "I'm sorry. I over reacted. I was probably just pmsing or something."

"Its fine. So we cool?" I chuckled.

"Yeah. We're cool as ice."

Just then, our drinks arrived.

"Ah, Mocha Lattes. How original," I remarked.

"Hey, you know it's our favorite drink."

I smiled.

"So, do you wanna explain to me why you were mad at me?" I asked.

"Ugh, how about we just forget everything that happened that night."

"Well, I would, but that's the thing. I can't."

"Well I don't mean literally, I just mean like..."

"Remember Amanda? The girl you brought to the party."

"Unfortunately," she muttered.

"Ever since I met her, I can't get her out of my head."

"Oh, I see."

"And everytime I reach out to her, there's no reply. I'm starting to freak out. Because I think I really like this girl."

She sighed.

"Well if you like this girl so much then go to her house. You know where she lives. God you can be stupid sometimes," she suggested.

"Ahah! That's what I'll do. That's such a good idea! Why didn't I think of that?"