The Marauders - Order of the Phoenix Part Three

Polyjuice

"James, we haven't had sex since --" Lily's voice died away before finishing the sentence.

James lay on the bed staring up at the ceiling, one arm folded under his head, the other over his chest. He bit his lip.

Since the test.

Since being found inadequate.

James took a deep breath.

"It doesn't have to be about trying," Lily whispered, and she ran her palm over the arm on his chest, leaning closer to him, her leg crooking over his so that her pelvis pressed against his hip and thigh. Her red hair fell over her shoulder, spilled onto the mattress beside his cheek, and she stared down into his eyes. Her eyes were so piercingly, hauntingly green. "I just want you." Her voice was low, sultry.

James stared back up at her. "Evans..."

"I miss the feeling of you, James," she whispered, leaning closer, her lips touched his ear as her hand slid over his abdomen, slowly lower, over his muscled skin and under the band of his pyjamas. "I miss the weight of you, and the taste of you. I miss the feeling of you..." She nipped the soft skin just under his ear and James tilted his head back, his hips rising slightly to her palm as she slid under the cloth...

He was losing his breath, losing his mind in the best way, the tattoo of inadequate that beat in his heart burying itself under a different throbbing...

But Lily's hands found nothing between his legs to grab onto. She pulled back and her face broke into laughter. "James, where is your --"

" -- jacket? James? Love? Did you fall asleep? Sweetie, we're supposed to leave in fifteen minutes and you're not even dressed... I've got the potion here; up, up love." Lily patted his knee urgently.

James groaned.

"Come on, up and at'em," Lily's voice was militant.

"Alright, Evans..." He rolled over, sliding his legs off the side of the bed.

For his own peace of mind, he pulled his pyjama pants out a way and glanced down, then slid his hand in to make sure everything was where it ought to be. He'd never been so glad to feel himself in tact and he let out a stressed sigh. "Thank Merlin," he muttered, letting go before he got any sort of reaction going.

"James, what are you doing?" Lily demanded, having come back 'round to his side of the room. She stood at the end of the bed, hands on her hips, an eyebrow raised.

"Uhhh..." James got up from the bed and grinned stupidly, not wanting to tell her about his weird dream.

"Honestly!" Lily shook her head and went 'round the other side of the bed.

James rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and hunched sleepily, staring out the window at the street lamps outside, glowing in foggy air outside. He glanced at his watch, sniffing, and saw it was somehow only half ten. Granted, he'd been exhausted after the Odair wedding, but it felt like it ought to be well after midnight at least. He was pulling on his jacket when Lily came over and tucked a small vial of polyjuice potion into the inside breast pocket of the jacket. "Here you are," she said, patting his chest. "We'll take that when we get to London."

He caught her arms before she could turn away and she looked up at him. "James?"

He had a hundred questions - nothing to do with the mission or anything that would seem relevant to her, though, just the things that were racing through his mind thanks to that bleeding dream.

Do you think I'm inadequate, Evans?

It was on the tip of his tongue. He opened his mouth to ask, but before the words came out, she tilted her head and asked, "Are you alright? Nervous about the polyjuice?" She frowned, "It's really not horribly scary, haven't you used it before? It gets some getting used to, it's a strange feeling - when I was Remus for his classes back in May, it was very odd feeling - particularly the bit of being a man - being Remus," she said, laughing. "But don't worry, James, I've gotten us disguises that won't be quite that dramatic of an experience." She stood up on her tip-toes and kissed his chin. "You'll still be a man." She winked.