The Marauders - Order of the Phoenix Part Three

LXXXIV: Players

Remus said, "Don't listen to her, Sirius... whatever she's saying to you... don't listen to her."

She was saying so many things... so many hateful, awful things. Things that Sirius couldn't find strength to argue... didn't know how to fight... things that tore him down, brick by brick...

"I know she's probably telling you awful things," Remus whispered, "But whatever it is she's saying, it's not true... it's not true, Sirius. The way she thinks she can just speak to you about the way other people feel about you... the way that I feel about you... well, I'm - I'm appalled, really! She doesn't know, Sirius. She doesn't know me and she doesn't know you."

Sirius's eyes flickered.

"She's as bad as my werewolf... don't let her take you over like my wolf does me, Sirius. You taught me how to stay with you when the wolf steals my soul, yeah? Stay with me, Sirius. Stay with me. Don't listen to her... listen to me. Listen to the sound of my voice. Stay with me, Sirius."

"Remus..." Sirius begged.

Remus didn't know what to do, he paused and closed his eyes. What defensive theory could he possibly apply to this? Dementors in the chest... a patronus couldn't penetrate skin and bone... How could he give Sirius the power to turn the dementors away? He thought suddenly of Harry, of the desperate look in Harry Potter's eyes when he'd hung back to ask him, Remus, about the dementors.

"What defenses? Can you teach me?" Harry's eyes were begging him. They looked so much like Lily's, full of determination, just like his father's...

Remus felt dizzy at the parallel... Sirius begging him now, Harry in his recent past...

"They glory in decay and despair, the drain peace, hope, and happiness out of the air around them... every good feeling, every happy memory, will be sucked out of you... it will feed on you long enough to reduce you to something like itself - soulless and evil. You'll be left with nothing but the worst experiences of your life... 

"Azkaban must be terrible," Harry had muttered.

Terrible indeed, Remus thought, Terrible enough to take the life and mind right out of the most alive and overactive minded people he had ever known.

An image of Sirius... laying slouched in the corner, staring into nothingness, his mouth moving but no words coming out...

Just like now.

It occurred to Remus suddenly what might be happening.

"You're not in Azkaban, Sirius."

"Sirius Black escaped from them, he got away," Harry had said.

Got away? I wish he had, Remus thought now, holding Sirius.

"You got away," Remus whispered. "You escaped from them, Sirius. And now you're here --"

"What could I possibly offer him? An impoverished werewolf with nothing to offer him but a good deal of depression and an astounding lack of answers?"

"Love. You could offer him love."

"You're here... you're here in my arms, you're safe in Haworth, in my house... in my bed. Right here, in the arms of me - me, your husband."

Remus bent low and kissed Sirius's face.

A whimper emitted from Sirius when Remus's lips touched his skin.

"Come back to me, Sirius, stay with me."

He drew a deep breath. Remus closed his eyes, holding Sirius close.