A SMILE IN THE MIND || VK

31

Jeongguk sat on his bed staring out the window, looking at the stars. Silent tears flowed down his cheeks. Every time he tried to control them, new tears kept pooling and filling the brim of his eyes as he had unforgettable flashbacks. 

No matter how much he tried to hate them, they were already embedded in his heart. He can't just simply forget them. No one knew anything about what they meant to him. He just simply can't unhand all those memories. He bit his lips as he wept bitterly. No sound, No whimpers. It was just the painful tears that were cascading down. He wished to make new memories and get rid of the old ones. 

"Kookie" 

He swiftly wiped his tears and whipped his head to the source of the noise. Taehyung was standing there in his oversized clothes with a pillow tucked in his arms, eyes dropping into sleep that were barely open with a small pout adorning his plump lips. 

"Baby" Jeongguk motioned the younger to come to him with his fingers and the younger gladly did. He threw the pillow on the bed and climbed the elder's lap, hugging his neck. 

"Can't sleep, kookie" Taehyung mumbled as he looked at the elder tiredly. "Why" Jeongguk softly asked as he brushed his fingers through the younger's hair. He held him carefully by one arm as he caressed with the other. He kept containing his tears. 

"Have you eaten?" the elder asked as he pressed a kiss on the younger's lips. He can never get enough of them. Taehyung simply nodded his head as he tried to keep his eyes open. That's when he noticed the elder's glossy, red eyes. He frowned as he touched the elder's cheeks gently with his long slender fingers. 

"Were you crying, kookie?" Taehyung asked, worried looking at his boyfriend's puffy face and red eyes. Jeongguk shook his head in denial. He didn't want to worry the younger. He didn't want to make him feel like he still has those bitter-sweet memories embedded in his head. That might not be the best idea.

"No, baby. I wasn't" He smiled as he pressed a kiss on the younger's forehead but the younger didn't look convinced. 

"Are you lying to me, Kookie?" Taehyung's voice was much softer. He ran his fingers through the elder's cheek. Jeongguk was trying his best to retain his tears but at last, he had to let them down. He never thought he'd be looking so weak before taehyung. He buried his face in the younger's palm as he sobbed.

 Taehyung immediately tensed looking at the elder. This wasn't the man who'd take care of him dearly every moment. He was strong, confident, calm and caring. He never has seen him this vulnerable in front of him. He never had seen him cry. He never looked so weak. 

He felt like a bad boyfriend as he didn't check on his boyfriend. If he was sad or happy. Something was bothering him. He felt like he hadn't done his best to make him happy. His pupils dilated every second as he looked at the elder in front of him. 

"K-kookie" Taehyung whimpered. His voice cracked as he couldn't see his boyfriend cry. He hated seeing him cry. 

Jeongguk shook his head and let go of the younger's hands. " I'm sorry, It was just nothing" Jeongguk tried to brush it away. 

"Come here, I'll help you sleep" Jeongguk tried to carry the younger up to help him sleep but the younger shook his head frantically in denial.

"No, Kookie, tell me if something is bothering you. I wanna help. I am all ears" Taehyung held his shoulder as he looked at the elder, concerned. Worry dripped through his eyes as he looked at the elder's state. 

"It's nothing, baby. You don't have to worry about it alright?" Jeongguk smiled as he brought his face up to stroke the younger's cheek. 

"You wouldn't be crying if everything is ok, kookie. I am here for you. You can tell me anything." Taehyung whispered as he wiped the elder's tears. He was adamant.