Invisible
May 16,2015
2:45 a.m
I couldn't sleep again today so I'm writing to you. My life hasn't gotten any better since the last time we spoke. I wish you were here, next to me comforting me through the hard times. I know you said you're there for me but I can't put all my shit on you. You're a good person, you don't deserve my burdens. That's why I did what I did to make things better. For everyone but most of all for you.
_________
Nicki yawned as the bright sun peeked through her curtains. She sat up looking out of her window. She smiled bright looking at the the beautiful view as if it was the last time she'd see it. She rushed downstairs hugging her mom and dad. She hoped they felt every bit of love she had left in her body. Nicki didn't hate her parents and she didn't blame them for anything. She was just born in the wrong time and the wrong place. Deep down inside they knew they did everything they could for her and she did too.
She plastered a smile on her face as she walked through the school that failed her. She wouldn't miss this place one bit. She hated everything about it, the smell and the people in it. She opened her locker sighing at the thought of someone else having it. "Take good care of her", she wrote on a sticky note placing it inside the locker. She was startled by an all too knowing voice...Beyoncé. Beyoncé was Nicki's friend who she was very fond of. She was the only reason Nicki had second thoughts about her choice.
"Hi", Beyoncé said with a nervous smile. Nicki held a sad smile, she knew that'd be the last time she got to see that look. "Hey B", she closed her locker. "You look different today", they began walking down the crowded hall. "Really?", Nicki pretended to be surprised. "You cut your hair, it looks nice", Beyoncé smiled looking the smaller girl over. She didn't think any one would notice the 3 inches she cut from her hair. She smiled to herself because Beyoncé noticed the minor change that her parents didn't.
Beyoncé looked at Nicki from time to time as she walked her to Chemistry class. Something about Nicki seemed off but she was too afraid to say anything. She didn't want to scare her off or have Nicki think she was weird. "I'll see you soon nobody", she jumped to ruffle Beyoncé's hair. She loved when Nicki did that, Beyoncé thought any touch of hers was nice. "You look great today", Nicki blushed giving her a genuine smile. "Thanks B", she walked into the class leaving Beyoncé with sweaty palms. The two didn't know the effect they had on another and it will later cost them.
Nicki rocked her leg up and down as she gained stares. She didn't know why she felt embarrassed because tomorrow none of this will matter. She flipped them off with a small smile on her face. "May I be excused?", she raised her hand. Her teacher nodded so she left class as needed. She checked the time laughing at how fast the time was coming for her departure in this world. She ran through the halls dancing with joy. She always wanted to do that.
Nicki looked down at all the people on the track. She noticed a few of them and others not so much. Most of the people held smiles on their faces, they were happy. And Nicki smiled because today wasn't a sad day but a happy day. She would finally get what she wanted out of life. Even if it meant taking her own life away.
She decided to start on her last letter. This was the letter that would break her heart the most. This was the only letter that she would regret writing.
To the person who'll miss me most
I want you to know none of this was your fault. You're the only reason I wanted to stay in this lonely place. You made me feel happy and whole all at once. Sometimes I was shocked on how a girl like you existed. I was lucky to have a nobody like you. And maybe if I weren't myself we would've worked. I wish I could've been better for you. But I'm not so I'm wishing you the best. Well that's all bye now.
xoxo Nicki
She felt accomplished writing this hoping if would last Beyoncé until they met again in a different world.
I wrote this 2 years ago out of inspiration from 13 reasons why, I hope you like it❤️-
Nicole💕
