First, the title generally doesn’t contain any punctuation marks like question marks, full stops and exclamation marks. Second, when a specific punctuation mark is used on repeat ( !!!! ), it doesn't change the meaning or emote anything more or less than the punctuation used once ( ! ).
Hence, the current title is a question, meaning a punctuation mark in this case a question mark is used which is not right, next the title has three question marks which is unnecessary, cause like I said it doesn't change anything about the title.
Lastly, I get that it is related to the plot but I don't see how it is unique or attractive compared to the rest of the titles I come across on a daily basis. It wouldn't draw attention to any random reader searching up books. Thus I suggest trying to come up with something more unique and interesting.
» Cover :: 4/10
To be frank, the cover seemed like a mess. The edits that were used were either unnecessary or misplaced.
Like, the black beaded line on top stands out since it doesn't blend with the colour scheme. And the letters below are unclear, while the angle in which the title has been placed is awkward. The overlay placed on top of the edit ruins all the effects and interferes with Jungkook's face claim too.
That was all about the graphics, now the cover as a whole doesn't reflect anything related to the plot in any way. Jungkook is guilt ridden almost throughout the story, he is portrayed lifeless and depressed due to his small mistake at the beginning of the story. The face claim used in the current cover relates only partially to the jungkook described in the story.
I suggest if you are new to editing then get an experienced editor to help make a good cover, if not then make a cover with better edits and graphics that relate to the vibe and theme of the plot. Use a good font for the title And mention the author's name, without which the book looks orphan.
» Blurb :: 1.5/5
The content was fairly good. A simple introduction to the plot, a few quotes and an intrigue point. But I am sure it can be improved. Add a bit more to the content, make it attractive and intriguing. Follow a unique writing style so it ameliorates the content, and makes the reader curious to read on.
Dawn :: 6/10
Again the way the plot took off was quite satisfactory.
The pace was somewhat uneven since it started off slow, took a turn fast and then slowed down after jk's wife gets lost and they both are apart from each other.
Apart from the plot development the grammar, writing style and flow was somewhat disappointing. I'll explain more in the coming categories.
Plot and Idea :: 12/20
The idea is pretty good, if implemented perfectly it would have been a really good book to read. It's interesting how you bring in plot twisted using a new character suho and an imbalance in Jungkook's character makes the plot unique in a way cause jk as a husband is not portrayed as a perfect husband instead has his own imperfections making the plot more realistic and read worthy.
Characters and Emotions :: 11/15
I loved jk's character like I said his imperfections and the way he handles problems and twists. He was a self made character.
The female lead was great too! But I'd say she could have been better, since she is blind I'd suggest don't give her dialogues. Describe her hand movements and actions too. If you are able to do that it would be wonderful especially if the writing style is exceptional. Give her perspective a poetic view on life and other beautiful things she observes. I believe when a human has a disability or lacks a sense they perceive things differently from other humans and describe their perceptions Ina more unique and creative way. If you are able to accomplish that using a good writing style it would bring a bigger difference to her character and take her to a whole new level of uniqueness and beauty.
Emotions and the way they are portrayed are a crucial part of any story and attention should be put on how you describe and present it to the readers In a way that interests and makes the reader see it through your words. A good vocabulary and portrayal of emotions go hand in hand and I'd say if you improve your writing and vocabulary the description part should be a piece of cake.
Writing Style :: 5/15
The descriptive part of the story lacks perfection. It's pretty good but with a better vocabulary and creativity it could be improved and perfected.
For this I'd suggest you read a lot of good books written by well known authors. Understand their way of choosing words and putting emotion and Description into their writing to show the readers what's happening.
Second, the dialogues of characters have been written in bold and are separated from the story without proper Tags. It has been written in the form of a play. Change that to the writing format of a story with dialogues in double quotes and other proper punctuations with action/verbal tags.
For example, instead of writing— Jungkook : where are you now? Write it as— "Where are you now," Jungkook whimpered.
Grammar :: 12/20
The grammar on the whole was satisfying, there weren't many visible mistakes, on the contrary I'd say your language is quite simple and minimalistic. Try to add in more content on description of appearances, Emotions, situations, etc. It appeals to the reader and keeps them hooked to the book.
Overall I liked your concept and plot. It was wholly and well paced. With a few corrections and improvements I'm sure it should be a read worthy book any reader would love to devour at any time!!
![𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐕𝐀𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐄 : ʀᴇᴠɪᴇᴡ sʜᴏᴘ [CLOSED]](https://img.wattpad.com/cover/287210578-64-k299057.jpg)