The title is quite pretty and seemed original to me. It is also connected to the story and basically, the story revolved around its mysteries and wonders in the start. The half mark though, was taken out since the lack of an article makes the shop look less unique.
» Cover :: 6/10
The cover is just fine — the style used isn’t really popular and is quite impressive.
But the use of all white makes it look less attractive and appealing. Also, the brown border seems oddly mismatched with the overall cover. The fonts used were exactly pretty, but they went along fine — the border to the fonts could’ve been removed and font colors could’ve been much better.
Also, it could’ve had Taehyung’s picture too since the book is mostly about his point of view.
» Blurb :: 2/5
Though it’s quite well written, it doesn’t get one interested in the book. It should’ve been more relevant to the entire theme of the story and could’ve been more original and creative.
Dawn :: 7/10
The book started quite nicely. Though the first chapter seemed irrelevant to the book, it was fine after the second chapter. The first chapter could’ve been written and framed in a better way, perhaps to depict that the three were really good friends or were quite playful all the time.
The beginning had a really nice and smooth pace. It was quite impressive since it’s right at the start.
Plot and Idea :: 15/20
The plot is fairly beautiful and things come together to make it really interesting. The suspense maintained is fairly intriguing.
But the idea doesn’t seem fairly unique to me, especially after a huge fandom is based on the series of demigods.
Other than that, the rest is fairly unique. Yoongi’s powers, his father’s lost caduceus, and the way his story along with it is fairly marvelous.
The plot twist where it is revealed that Yoongi is actually a Greek God is impressive too. Being a huge fan of mythology, I loved the way you presented the story with the correct facts.
The pace of the story is not steady here. In the start, it’s quite simple and slow, elaborating the details and highlighting more but as the story proceeds, the chapters become less elaborate and the details seem quite ignored to me. It would’ve been nicer if you had added some natural details to it. I would suggest taking time and adding more details about the things.
Characters and Emotions :: 12/15
The characters are all well presented. I like the way Taehyung is a quiet observant boy for Yoongi but around others, he’s quite relaxed and not really so observant and keen.
Yoongi is really calm and serene for a son of Hermes, but it goes together very well with the entire story. I loved the way he was portrayed in the story — every action of his shows how nice and calm he is. The side characters are really nice too. One thing I liked the most about this book was that no one really acted out of character here.
Emotions were conveyed just fine throughout the book, but I feel there was still room for improvement. Especially in vital places like when Yoongi first met Taehyung, when he revealed who he is, and some other emotional reunites.
Writing style :: 12/15
I’m fairly ambiguous about the writing style. It’s really nice and simple but sometimes it lacks detail. There are some details you lacked in the book, but there are several chapters where you elaborated the events just fine.
Maybe you should try to keep the pace of the book steady and elaborate on the important events and details. You should also try adding more emotions to the story.
Grammar :: 15/20
The grammar throughout the book is fine. There aren’t really many mistakes but some minor details that you seem to have overlooked while writing. I’d suggest you fix those details.
Also, there are several times when you’ve not closed the clauses or closed them after the dialogue tag. You have skipped full stops and commas too.
The tense of the chapter is fixed, but you seem to change the tense in the middle of the story sometimes. I have been confused with what tense the story is written in when I’m starting a new chapter sometimes. I suggest using a single tense throughout the story.
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