I stir awake, my eyes too heavy to open. The sound of rain hitting the window keeps me calm and I look over to Sawyer sound asleep. I don't notice his arms are wrapped around my waist until he tightens around me. I scoot closer to him and lie my head on his chest.
I close my eyes once more and feel him rubbing my arm. He isn't asleep. He's been up all night. I sneak a peek at the time, it's almost four in the morning. I feel him kiss me on the top of my head,
"Are you okay?" He asks, his voice deep and full of sleep. I look at him confused before my sleep is gone and my memories from the day before floods my mind. One look into Sawyers eyes makes me tear up. I try holding in my tears but I'm unable too. The immense amount of sadness just hits me all at once. I hide my face in his chest as he pulls me closer to him.
I don't remember coming back to my room. I must have fallen asleep and he carried me up here. His warmth makes me feel drowsy once again, and I cry myself to sleep. I feel safe in Sawyers arms. I fall asleep to the sound of the peaceful rain and his heartbeat.
The morning light makes me squint and stir awake. I'm alone on the bed and I sit up. I can feel my hair all over the place and I just plop back down. I pull the blanket over me. The memories of me and my family happy, and loving run through my mind. The memory of my mom dancing to any music that was on. My dad always with a video camera recording every and any moment no matter how significant it was. Me being annoyed, me growing older and being mean to both of them. The guilt is eating at me. Why was I so mean? I wish I could hug them both one last time.
I feel the bed dip beside me.
"I got a warm bath running for you." I hear Sawyers deep voice. It's small, like he doesn't want to disturb me. I feel him squeeze my shoulder and I shutter.
With a sigh I slowly get up. Sawyer softly smiles when he sees I'm folding the blanket. He doesn't say anything he just watches me. I'm glad he isn't talking, his presence is enough.
"There's water right there. And a few berries." He says and I turn to the side table he pointed to. There's a water bottle and a plate of cut up fruit. He sees me scrunch my nose.
"At least two bites." He encourages and I take the water.
"Don't make me force feed you." Her sternly says and I frown. He gives me a pointed look and I roll my eyes. I grab the fork and plop a few berries into my mouth. I'm really hunger, the first bite making me want more. I end up eating the whole bowl of fruit. He walks over to me and looks at the empty bowl,
"Good." He says and he kisses me my forehead.
I head for the bathroom and take the longest bath I've ever taken. My tears are mixed with the bath water and I close my eyes.
"Hey." I hear a knock at the door. It's Avery. "Just want to make sure you're okay. You don't have to talk, but just knock twice." She says and I smile. I knock on the bathroom wall twice. "Okay good. We're all here." She says and I nod, forgetting she can't see me.
By the time I'm ready to head downstairs everyone is already sitting around the kitchen table. They all stop talking as soon as I come in. Avery is the first one to rush to me. She embraces me in a tight hug.
"I'm so sorry. If you need anything just ask." She whispers into my ear. "I'm sorry." She says again as she pulls away from me. I give her a small smile. "Nancy made breakfast." She perks up, and points to the table full of food. I look for Sawyer but he isn't on the table.
I sit next to an empty chair.
"I know we can't replace you're really family. But just know you've been family this whole time." Evan tries to comfort me which makes me laugh a little.
