Standing Joke

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Qing's Tape 7, Side A

Qing: Kim is back. She had given birth. A baby girl. Ato is very happy.

Dra.Yen: Can you pass my greetings to them? Kim must have gone through a lot.

Qing: Her parents won't recognize the baby. Kim's father is threatening to ruin her career if she will not marry me and insist on taking care of the baby. They still have no idea that I know about the Kim's child.

Dra.Yen: Kim's father must be limited in his thinking. For him, as another man, he thinks you will not be comfortable to marry Kim if you knew that she had another man's child. He doesn't know you. He doesn't know that you are a good friend that you will marry Kim and take responsibility of the child if the real father refuse to do so.

Qing: But Ato wanted the baby. He is taking care of her. Together with his mother. Kim is being guarded by his father. Our grandfathers are unaware of what is happening. They are busy getting ready to merge our families.

Dra.Yen: I would never understand the thinking of old and rich families like yours.

Qing: You don't have to understand. I sometimes question it too, but I think it is inked in our blood. I am not allowed to bring shame to my family. The fact that I hurt myself and they have to get me to a hospital plus answer those awkward questions are enough grief for my grandparents. It's not their fault. They were good grandparents to me. But I still bring them shame that way.

Dra.Yen: They never held that against you.

Qing: That is why I want to repay my grandfather in marrying Kim. As long as Kim is willing.

Dra.Yen: Is she willing?

Qing: Yes. For Kim, this is the only way she can see to get out of her family's influence. Once she became my wife, she will have the freedom to mother her daughter and be an actress.

Dra.Yen: Her father is blackmailing her.

Qing: Maybe, I am not sure. But once I marry Kim, I will speak to her father. I don't have enough rights for now, but once Kim became my wife, I will be the first person responsible to her. Ato and I can protect her.

Dra.Yen: And Ato?

Qing: He is nodding to what Kim wants but I know Ato's pride. This is a blow to him. To see the woman he loves marry another. But he is agreeing to this because his love for Kim is more important than his pride. That's what he said.

Dra.Yen: But still...

Qing: I know. I only need a few years. Once I have a seat in the Parliament, I can start making connections of my own. I can divorce Kim quietly and she and Ato can marry. I just need a few years.

Dra.Yen: And Dayu?

Silence. Long silence.

Qing: I am...avoiding him for the time being.

Dra.Yen: (sounding surprised) Why?

Qing: I am...scared. I thought I am ready to let Kim and Dayu meet but I suddenly got scared. What if Dayu got cold feet and decided to leave me again? He left me once. I don't want it to happen again.

Dra.Yen: So you are avoiding him. How?

Qing: I promised to call him but it's been two days already and I haven't called him yet. He called me a few times but I didn't answer.

Dra.Yen: (sighing) That is so unlike you. I am disappointed Wang Qing. I never thought of you as a coward before.

Qing: I know. It's cowardice. But I am scared. Dayu can make me feel scared. As much as he makes me happy, I am afraid of him. I am afraid because he can also take the happiness away by leaving me.

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