Teach me how to fly

PART 18: Mirror

Heyyy :D

Well, this is not a planned chapter. I was not in the best mood and this just came out so.... It's short, though. The planned and longer chapter will be up in a few days :D

Make sure you listen to the song on the side while listening to it! It is "Broken Pieces" by Apocalyptica and Lacey.

I hope you like it :D

PART 18: Mirror

There’s a girl in my mirror crying tonight, and there’s nothing I can tell her to make her feel alright…

-WeHeartIt

Avery’s P.O.V.

“Tristan!” I screamed at the top of my lungs.

I tried to run and hug him but my father grabbed my body and immobilized it against his.

“Let go!” I yelled.

“This is for the better, Avery,” he replied steadily.

“The better?! For who?! His father?! Me?! His sister?! You?! Knowing that you’re not the only monster around here makes you feel better?!”

He slapped me.

“Don’t touch her!” Tristan yelled angrily.

“You bastard, come with me!” Tristan’s so called father yelled grabbing my friend's slim body.

“Avery!” Tristan shouted.

“Let go of him!” I heard Ali’s fainting voice.

“You cannot beat me up in the middle of the street!” I hissed at my father and freed myself from his grip.

I ran and threw myself into Tristan’s arms.

“Please don’t leave!” I yelled.

“It’s not up to me,” he murmured.

His father unwrapped me from him and threw his very own son into that cub like he was a piece of trash.

“TRISTAN!” I scream until I had no voice left and my body fell unconscious on the road.

I woke up screaming.

My whole face and pillow were damp.

I always cried while watching this dream and trust me, I watched it a lot.

This scene just didn’t get out of my head. It was always there, haunting me.

I suddenly felt emptier than usual. I needed Tristan back. I seriously did.

I grabbed my i-pod and selected his favorite song; Broken Pieces by Apocalyptica and Lacey.

I cried silently as I remembered the next day after he left.

I woke up not being able to feel my body. ‘Father’ made sure he beat the life out of me when I regained consciousness. However, the hole on my chest hurt more than the black bruises on my body. It was like a part of me was brutally torn off me and now it was just missing. I tried to rearrange my mind and body and got to Ali’s house.

Ugh! When did walking become so difficult?!

When I made it there, I sneaked in by the door of the kitchen and tiptoed upstairs.

“Ali?” I mumbled getting into her room.

Her eyes were bloodshot. She had been crying.

“Ave?” she mimicked me.

I sat down on the floor.

“I seriously don’t know what is going to happen now,” I muttered.

“I do.”

I looked at her with a puzzled expression.

“Everything is going to be worse, skittle babe. Everything is just going to be worse…”

I spent more than an hour trying to calm her down. She kept saying how this was all your fault and how she fucked everything up without wanting it.

Hell, it was definitely not her fault. She was the only one who was not to blame.

When she fell asleep, I went back to my room and cried my eyes out until I fell asleep too.

And now?

Now, I was trying to get the memories off my mind but the tears just wouldn’t stop. It was like someone broke a dam and set an impetuous river free. Before Ali’s death that day was by far the worst day of my life and now, without Asher taking care of me and distracting me, all those memories were coming back.

I shot up and got into the bathroom. I got into the tub and used a sponge to wash the butterfly off.

I’m sorry Ash.

Well, yeah, he was not with me anymore and it was mostly my fault but I couldn’t have him telling me that he understands. Cause he didn’t! And I didn’t want him to! If you are not depressed, you cannot understand. If you haven’t been through all these things, you cannot freaking understand.

To be honest, I didn’t want him to understand. I would never want him to go through all these shit.

And just like that, Tristan’s eyes popped into my mind making my head burn.

I grabbed the razor and slid it over my hip bone until I had lost the count of cuts and I was totally empty. Meaning; no feelings, no memories, no tears, no thoughts.

I got out of the tub and focused my gaze at my reflection in the mirror.

Waterfalls of blood were running down my thigh.  My hip bone almost screamed because of the pain I have caused.

This was my image.

My stupid and pathetic image.

The stupid and pathetic me.

My awful self who came out and kicked the only person who cared out of my life.

I clenched my fist and punched the mirror as hard as I could, not being able to stand looking at me.

And in that moment, the only thing I wished for was having Asher by my side…

~*~

Sadder and shorter than usual, I know....

THANKS SO MUCH FOR READING!

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