Hard Boy ✔️

41

- 18; One Direction -
- that way; Tate McRae - 

Aurora Holland

I watched as Carter sat on my bed, his shoes off and legs propped up as if I had invited him over. He looked at me as I exited the bathroom, his eyes trailing from my feet to the top of my head. He didn't say anything as he sat forward, and I couldn't help but wonder exactly how long he'd been sitting there.

"Nice shower playlist you got there," He commented.

Okay, so he was clearly here for a while.

"Why the fuck are you here?" I asked, gripping the towel in my hands tightly. I couldn't help the attitude that came out, but I was really aggravated I couldn't even be in my own bedroom without something happening. "How did you get in here?" I then asked, remembering I'd locked the front door.

"Window was cracked. Also, we need to finish our conversation," He said. "I missed you too, by the way."

"Stop," I said, shaking my head. "Whatever it is you're doing just stop please."

"I don't know what I'm doing, that's the thing." He sighed as he stood up, scratching the top of his head.

"You-" I stopped, taking in a deep breath. "You're playing with me."

"I'm not," He said.

"You are."

"Not."

"Are."

"Not,"

"You are!" I exclaimed, dropping the towel. "You cuddle me and call me baby and take me on a date and treat me like- like I see in the movies then you turn around and-and ignore me!"

"I didn't mean to make it seem like I was ignoring you, Rory." He mumbled, "I just-"

"You just what? You-you realized on the date that you weren't interested in me? That I was weird? That I wasn't what you wanted? You couldn't just tell me?" I asked, my hands waving around dramatically. "I-I just don't understand what I did." The last part came out in a whisper, tears flooding my sight.

This caused him to be blurry, and I couldn't see the expression on his face.

"What? Rory, no!" He exclaimed, "I was just-" He stopped this time, thinking of what he wanted to say. "When you told me you hadn't had your first kiss I freaked."

"Seriously? That's what this is about?" I asked.

"I didn't want to be the person to take your first kiss and then end up hurting you somehow." He admitted.

I wiped at my eyes, able to see him again. He looked sad, standing a good few feet away from me.

"You hurt me anyway," I said. "You wouldn't have hurt me if you were just honest."

"I shouldn't have gotten distant, I'm sorry." He said, taking a step closer.

"If you didn't want to kiss me you could have just said so," I then said, picking at my hand.

"I-" He stopped, taking another step. "I want to kiss you. So fucking bad," He admitted. "But I don't want to ruin your first kiss. It should be with someone you're sure about."

"Well, what if I want you to be my first kiss?" I asked, "You ever think of that? That I'm sure I want it to be you?"

"Rory," He said. "I know how much this shit means to you. The last thing I want is to fuck that up."