A/N: Above are two drawings I've made of how I picture the Antarians. From those drawings, it becomes fairly obvious how different the royals and the "original" Antarian are, not just in behavior but also in appearance.
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At first, his eyes were all that I saw.
They were large. Extremely large. But oddly beautiful.
With Maria's scream fading and dying in my ears, Dresden's sapphire-colored eyes filled my vision.
After having seen Sean and Sergeant at the moment when death had undressed their human forms, Dresden's alien appearance was not frightening. My heart slamming hard against the inside of my ribs revealed that looking at someone who looked so different but still so much like a human, was indeed making me nervous. Although, the overwhelming feeling was relief.
Relief that he hadn't looked like them.
Dresden's face was thin, his mouth small. But at least he had a mouth.
The room was silent. Deafeningly so. As if everyone was holding their breaths, while staring at Dresden. Even the hybrids - Isabel, Michael, Alex and Max - were silent.
In quiet peace, we were all observing this large man with his hairless head, the mere holes into the center of his face instead of an actual nose, and the oddly elongated flaps on both sides of his head, above those large ears. Similar openings were visible below his eyes. Gills, I realized. The flaps looked like gills.
He was slightly purple, his skin tinted in warm blue tones, rather than an earthy color base like a human being. The coloring was darker on his throat and down his exposed arms, while lighter on his face.
And he was tall. Standing up in this underground room, he had to hunch to be able to fit against the limit of the ceiling. Which would make him close to 8 feet.
His bald head was large and slightly transparent. I could see hints of his brain, the blood vessels running underneath the thin skin covering the skull.
But it was his eyes that captured me. Looking into them was like looking into a big pond of water. Gave me a sensation of falling. Of loosing my footing, but in a good way. Like it was a place I wanted to fall into. Where there was comfort and security.
Without the human disguise, I felt like I could finally read him. As if his 'human costume' had not correctly translated who he really was. What he felt.
Suddenly, he seemed instantly more empathetic. His face was humanoid enough for me to be able to easily see emotions shift over his face. Maybe his human shape had lessened his natural expression. Maybe that's what it did to all pure aliens. Maybe that's why I viewed the majority of the pure aliens I had met as cold and indifferent.
Like when you put a silicon mask on, and it, while made to fit your features, still appeared stiff and unable to translate the appropriate small movements of your expressions, muting your ability to display emotions.
I found myself instantly trusting this non-human in front of me.
Maybe that's why even Maria had grown silent. Maybe she was seeing what I was seeing. Maybe she was seeing the true goodness in Dresden's face.
Close to no time had passed, but it felt like forever. I had to physically tear my eyes away from Dresden to look at Diane. I wanted to see if she was frightened. Because she was actually married to a pure Antarian. If she had never seen what they looked like, this might freak her out.
But the breath got stuck in my throat as my eyes fell on her (on the person seated next to her). Next to her was Max's father. In his true alien form.
A tremble went through me. Mostly out of surprise at unexpectedly seeing him like that. Much the same as with Dresden, Mr. Evans looked nicer without his human shell. His large eyes connected with mine and I was overwhelmed with the need to cry. To cry from relief and happiness stemming from finally understanding who he was and finally feeling that Max's father truly was on our side.
Even if I could clearly see that they were not related, the basic attributes of Mr. Evans' non-human appearance were similar to Dresden's.
However, while Dresden's skin was purplish, Mr. Evans' coloring was more blue, making his large eyes shift in shades of green cobalt against the light blueness of his face.
Mr. Evans was obviously of the same large alien size as Dresden, but appeared smaller than Dresden. He was still sitting down, looking like a giant next to his human wife, but I could guesstimate from the width of his chest that he was slightly shorter than the leader of the rebellion.
This time, when Maria let out a loud gasp that abruptly cut through the somewhat reverential silence of the room, Max's grip was no longer strong around my waist. He was as stunned by Dresden and Mr. Evans alien reveal as the rest of the group. His thoughts were not clear to me, most likely because they were not clear to himself, but I could only presume that his father unclothing his human skin was not a common Friday evening activity in the Evans' household.
The survival instinct had most likely clawed its way through the initial shock and awoken Maria to the surreality of this situation. It's one thing to talk about aliens, another thing altogether to sit face to face with them, looking very different from humans.
Maybe it was my usual urge to make sure that everyone else's needs were met before my own that held my own panic back in favor of making sure that Maria was okay. Because even though I had been in this world a lot longer than Maria and had experienced a lot more, it was not a walk in the park or a shrug of the shoulders to be in the same room as real life aliens actually looking like aliens.
That aforementioned perk of my personality kicked in full force when Maria scrambled to her feet, her eyes widened in terror, her movements unfocused and panicked in their incoordination. Raw wild fear shone in her eyes as Michael moved his hand to her arm, either to stop her or help her, I'm not sure.
Through terrified tears, she hissed, her voice breaking in several places, "Don't touch me."
"Hey," Michael replied, the regular roughness of his voice markedly softened, "I don't look like that."
Max's hands fell away from my hips as I got to my feet.
Her sob - which crackled over her lips like a painful strike of lightning - ignited every protective instinct in my body, and before Maria's opened mouth had managed to form words, I had wrapped my fingers tightly around Michael's thick bicep and sharply pulled him backwards. Away from Maria.
I briefly met his eyes - surprised, maybe at my strength? - before I moved between him and Maria and gently took Maria's hand.
Her hand was damp with sweat and it was trembling so badly that I could feel the vibrations up my underarm. It made me tighten my hold while I searched out her frantic eyes. Her body was already moving, pulling towards the door.
Escape.
"Ria?" I prompted.
Tears ran down her blotchy cheeks while her eyes met mine and her voice hissed in a loud whisper, "They're not human, Lizzie."
I frowned, then nodded. "Yes. I know, babe."
She was pulling on our joined hands, her eyes jumping erratically around the room. "Maybe they will let us leave."
I stared at her. Speechless. She was acting paranoid. Mad, even. Maybe she was losing it. Maybe this was too much for her. Her fear dug deep into the very core of my heart and I felt it start to freeze me.
What if she had gone insane? How would we protect her then?
Her gaze never stopped for more than one second on the same spot. Constantly traveling. Constantly checking. "Maybe," she breathed loudly. "Maybe it's not too late to leave." Her eyes dropped to my face and transfixed I watched the small twitches in the corners of her red-brimmed eyes as she continued, "They might let us leave, right?"
The horrible wet desperation in her voice was heavily emphasized by her free hand tightly encircling my upper arm. So tight that it hurt.
Her eyes were the size of dining plates and I had never seen such naked primitive fear. She was fearing for her life.
I tried to find my voice through swallowing. "Let's go someplace to talk, okay? Some privacy. Alright?"
I heard Michael start to protest behind me, probably wanting to inform me of how that wasn't safe, but I turned to look at him long enough to make him grow quiet.
I have no idea how I looked like or what my eyes were telling him, but it didn't matter. As long as it worked.
I was aware of Max getting to his feet a short distance behind me. I could see Maria's frightened large eyes not letting go of him moving behind my back for a second, while I tried to direct us up to the door.
I'm gonna be here, Max informed me. On the other side of the door.
The coldness in my heart, brought about by Maria's fear, drowned in the love from Max, and I gave him a small grateful smile over my shoulder, letting myself get lost in his eyes for a second too long to gather some strength, before I guided Maria through the door and out the room.
Before the door closed behind us, I heard Dresden announce to the remaining members of the seated circle, "Enough Show and Tell for today. Let's get some sleep," and, "Michael, let Max handle this."
Then I was alone with Maria. While turning away from the door to face her, I was just about to open my mouth to speak with her, to ask if she was okay, how she was handling it all. But she beat me to it.
Her damp palms pressed up against my cheeks, cradling my face in her trembling frantic grip, while her stiff fingers dug into the flustered softness of my cheeks like claws. Upon finding her agitated face within inches of my own, close enough to feel the warmth of her breath against my skin, I blinked in startled surprise.
"We have to find a way out," she emphasized, small droplets of saliva landing on my face from how hard she was pressing the words out through her teeth.
"Maria, please-" I started, but my attempt at pleading with her only had her forcefully shake her head from side to side.
"No. They've got you under a spell. Max-, " she cut herself off, let my eyes momentarily go while she moved paranoid eyes in the direction of the door next to us before panning her eyes back to me and whispering in a loud hiss, "Max has done something to you."
When I opened my mouth to protest, her fingers sunk deeper into my cheeks. Painfully so. In response, I wrapped my hands around her wrist, attempting to urge her hands away.
Even though it took a monumental effort to pry her hands away, there was zero awareness of this fact on her face. Instead, she kept talking in that heightened conspiratorial voice of hers, "They are not human, Lizzie. You saw them too, right? You must have seen them! They are giants! They could crush us. They're purple. And blue! They didn't have noses and you could- could see their brains. They are not-" she gasped, as if her own words was making it seem more real to her, "They are not human."
I took a hold of her hands down by our waists and held them tightly to signal how much I was on her side.
"I know, Ria," I tried, keeping my voice as calm as I could. "But-"
Her face moved closer again, her green eyes filling my vision. "We have to get out of here!"
Frustration at her possible impending mental breakdown made impatience shoot through me and I was unable to hide it from tainting my voice. While pressing her hands for emphasis, I told her as calmly as I could, "Didn't you hear them? We're probably safest here-"
Maria frowned, her face quickly moving from shocked surprise, to disbelief, before ending up in something akin to disgusted betrayal.
With a sharp tug she freed her hands from my grip, took a step back, and her body stiffened into distant consternation. It was an appearance of disapproval that I had seen in her before. Usually when I had refused to come along to parties and other social events. It might not be a look I felt happy with, but at least I recognized it more than the paranoid frightened girl that had been here just seconds ago.
"Didn't you hear them?!" she demanded, looking angry and, surprisingly, insulted. Before I could answer her rhetorical question, she continued, "They want to use you and your love for Max to solve their problems. They have even made up this whole fucking story about how you have a piece of their DNA, so that they can convince you to fight for their cause. Something that is surely gonna kill you. And- and I have no idea why, but they need you for some reason."
Deep disappointment crept into every trusting cell of my body while she spoke. It was one thing that she didn't quite believe them. But it was a whole other thing that she still didn't believe me. Whether Maria intended for it or not, it downgraded my horrible last couple of weeks into nothing. Like they didn't matter.
It made me snap. Made me grab a hold of those thin upper arms, vaguely notice the shadow of astonishment sweep across her features, and give her upper body a sharp shake.
"Calm. Down. Now."
I wasn't screaming. I was just stating. But apparently the statement was successful enough, considering that her slack mouth made no attempt at interrupting or protesting.
"Now you listen," I continued in that same tone of voice.
I hadn't expected her to give her assent, but she mutely nodded nonetheless.
"This is a fucked up situation, okay? I get that. I'm living it too, you know. I've been living this crap for the past few weeks."
I was aware of Max's presence on the other side of the door. Of his unwavering support through the connection. It strengthened my resolution to work this out with Maria.
"And I don't fully trust those aliens either. But we have no choice." I gave her body another hard shake. "There are aliens - more of those multicolored giants - out there," I pointed in no general direction to signal 'out there', and continued, "and they're out for our scalps. Or worse; to use us. Make us into their brainless puppets. Do you have any idea what it feels like to have your will taken from you? To be semi-aware of that you are being controlled but not be able to do anything? To make you hurt someone you don't want to hurt? To make you kiss someone you don't want to? To make you do worse things than that?"
Her large wide eyes blinked slowly once in a silent response.
"Trust me, if choosing between that and this, there's no question what to pick. Those in that room might be aliens and hybrids, but in some backward way of thinking they are actually protecting us." I inhaled, having forgotten to breathe. "And, maybe their intentions are partly - or even mostly - selfish, but at least those intentions indirectly protects us."
A reaction of life sparked in Maria, like pressing the on-button on a talking doll. With a sudden jerk, she opened her mouth to say, "I don't think you realize that they are aliens, Lizzie. As in not from this planet. How do we know anything about their freaking moral code? They might be tricking your ass off. They might be manipulating you right now. Just like that Tess girl. How do you know who is telling the truth?"
There was a pause of silence, before I said, "I just know. There's a lot of gut feeling involved here."
Calmness draped itself over Maria, making her look very close to the calmly collected version of Maria, my best friend. "It's because of Max, isn't it?"
Her assumption ignited my anger. Again, she was making it trivial. My voice was hard as I almost sneered, "This is a lot bigger and a lot more serious than love."
She frowned, undeterred by my tone. "Is it, though? To sum it all up, that's all they were talking about in there. How your love is meant to save their race."
She had a point. It irritated me even more that she did.
Grumpily, I admitted, "Sure, but there's still more to it than that."
Her tears had dried on her cheeks. The shock had obviously left her and her fear had either disappeared or been pushed away in favor of convincing me in a more calm manner to leave.
Thus, her voice was calm and collected as she questioned, "Is it serious? Between you and Max?"
I hesitated. Not because of the (obvious) answer to that question, but rather because I felt like I needed a second or two to correctly formulate a description.
"We are forever," I said. Simply and without a doubt.
She was watching me closely. In that honest and curious way. I was hit with the feeling that her question might have been a decisive factor in this discussion.
"And you are sure of this?" she pressed.
"Yes," I responded as clearly as if I had answered 'I do' in church.
"And because of that, you're certain that this is a battle you need to be a part of?"
"Yes," I said again, but lacking some of that previous certainty.
Her scrutinizing gaze kept tracing my facial features, while the seconds slowly ticked by.
I was starting to doubt that she was able to reach a conclusion on this, which had me - again - point out, "This is the safest place for us to be right now."
She looked at me silently for a couple of seconds more, before she took a step forward and closed the distance between our bodies. Leaning in, she brought her lips close to my right ear and whispered, "I don't trust them. They're not from this planet. They have an agenda and they can choose what they want to tell us." Her hands clasped around the top of my shoulders. "I have no idea what their race is like. Are they honest or a bunch of liars? Fair or deceitful? Good or evil?"
I trembled as she voiced my own concerns. She had the liberty to articulate them, while I felt bound to Max and thus somewhat forced to trust the people around him to be able to support Max.
"Maybe by engaging in this battle, we'll be helping them take down the whole of humanity."
A snort of incredulity escaped me at this, but simultaneously I knew that she had a point.
How did we know that Dresden and his 'followers' weren't trying to do the same thing as Command and his gang, just using other slogans and methods?
"But if you believe that we are safe here - safer than out there - I'll stay with you. Mostly because I don't want you to be alone with all those creatures."
"Maria, I-" I started in a grateful mumble, but Maria's hands tightened around my bony shoulders and she cut me off.
"But I will not engage in any alien battle. That's their mess. And I won't act nice and put on a polite face. I don't owe these people anything. I'm only here to keep you company."
It almost sounded innocent when she said it like that. It made my arms move around her shoulders and crush her in an awkward hug.
Maria. My feisty, strong-willed best friend. Who, obviously, could move from a state of panic to reasonable calmness with a couple of words. I'm not sure what made her change her mind or what brought her out of that previous frantic mindset, but I was happy that she had been willing to cooperate.
At the same time, I couldn't help but wonder if she had said all those things just to please me while she was secretly planning to escape.
Which probably would set her up for a one-way trip to the enemy. Something she might not survive.
The thought chilled me and I pulled back, looking her firmly in the eyes. "Promise me something."
"Maybe," she said, tightening her lips in an attempted smile. It failed.
"That you won't try to escape. That we stick together."
She looked unhappy. Bordering on angry. And I knew that I had hit the spot. She had been planning a decampment as soon as the opportunity presented itself.
"Ria?" I prompted, quiet desperation in my request.
She sighed. Loudly. Very much like Michael, I realized, slightly amused in the midst of my concern.
"Fine."
I relaxed, relieved. I trusted her promise. She always kept her word.
So I smiled. A genuine smile. "Thank you."