Morrigan had spent the past few nights on Owens couch. She appreciated his hospitality and in return made sure that she cooked all three meals for the two. He at first protested insisting that it wasn't necessary, but finally gave in when he realized that she wouldn't budge on the subject. Since their chat about Christmas, the topic hadn't been brought up. He knew that she needed her time and space to think without anyone else's opinion being thrown into the mix.
At Grimmauld Place chaos erupted. Without Morrigan around to keep the peace or resolve conflicts, tensions were at a high. Molly grew frustrated with the twins pranks, Ron and Ginny bickered, Harry was sassier than usual, Hermione resolved to reading in her room all day, and Sirius moped around the house. Kreacher was the most impacted of all being especially rude to anyone who tried to bother him.
The christmas holidays were ending and New Years Eve was fast approaching. Harry had finally decided that it was time to visit the pub. After telling Ron and Hermione his plan they agreed to follow, letting only the twins know where they would be disappearing to. Fred raised a brow at the trio, "Do you even know where it is?"
"Down the road," Harry said confidently.
"Which direction down the road?" George pressed with a smirk. Harry's face fell realising he didn't think through his plan. "When you leave the house turn left and walk straight down for about five or so minutes, it's called The Thirsty Badger."
"Thank you," Harry said gratefully using his father's cloak to sneak out of the house.
Morrigan was busy chatting to a young woman at the bar when the trio walked in, her eyes widened in surprise, "What are you lot doing here?"
"Owen said he had some pictures of my mum to show me," Harry reasoned.
"Let me go grab him," Morrigan said dashing into the back.
Ron looked around the pub with an impressed look, "Not a bad place actually, I pictured it more like the leaky cauldron."
Hermione leaned into him and spoke quietly, "Remember this is a muggle pub, be careful."
He rolled his eyes, "Alright 'mione."
Owen came into the main room with a book in his hands, "Good to see you guys." He greeted gesturing for them to follow him. He sat down in one of the booths in the back. "Sorry I would have us sit at the bar with Morrigan, but I can't really risk having anyone see these photos move."
"It's alright," Harry said sincerely. "Is she okay? No one's really told us what's going on."
"She's coping," Owen answered honestly, "I think you'd have to ask her yourself for more details though." He clapped his hands together, "Anyway's heres the photo album." He opened the front page and it became obvious that Mary had put a lot of effort in creating the book. As they flipped through the pages Owen explained each photo as though he had memorized it from Mary's perspective. He pointed out Mary and Lily's first Hogsmeade trip, their first formal together, the slug club dinners, watching quidditch on the sidelines. It was a detailed representation of the girls time at Hogwarts. Owen's breath hitched when he reached a page, quickly flipping it hoping the young kids didn't see the photo.
Harry stopped him, "Was that Sirius?"
Owen nodded, "Perhaps it would be best if I got Morrigan now." He quickly shuffled out of the booth and began talking to Morrigan. The trio watched from afar as the two adults peered over towards them. They saw her sigh and nod. She quickly excused herself from the customer and asked her to holler if she needed anything.
Morrigan slid into the booth beside Owen. Harry had reopened the book and his eyes were focused on a picture of Sirius and Mary the two in a romantic embrace. Harry's brows furrowed, "Did you know that Sirius dated his sister?"
"Not when I first met Owen no. And obviously until Christmas Owen had no idea who snuffles was. Sirius told me that he had taken her on one date and that was all... that's what our disagreement on Christmas was about."
"He lied," Hermione reiterated for Ron who looked terribly confused.
Morrigan nodded, "It was a lot more complicated than what he lead me to believe. I've just needed my space these past few days. I'm sorry about that, for leaving without saying goodbye again."
"It's alright Morrigan," Hermione said her voice mellow, "we knew where you were."
Harry continued to flip through the book seeing more photos of Sirius and Mary, then James and Lily, until it stopped. There were events marked but no photos added into the book. "Why did she stop?" He asked Owen.
"Things between Sirius and Mary didn't end well," Owen said vaguely, "I think it hurt her too much to keep adding to the book, knowing that the past would always be looking right back at her."
"So why did you keep it then?" Ron asked.
"Ronald!" Hermione scolded.
"It's alright," Owen reassured them, "Shortly after she left Hogwarts she was killed. I didn't have much left of her, all of the magical items she owned were recovered. I only just managed to keep this book hidden. I couldn't get rid of it. I'll pull out a few photos for you Harry to keep of your mum."
"Thank you," Harry said unsure of what else to say in the uncomfortable situation.
"Can I get you guys something to drink?" Owen asked.
"What's that thing you made me Morrigan?" Harry asked with a grin.
"No," She said with a bright smile, "We would lose our license if I served you. I'll make you guys something fun though."
"You stay here, I'll grab the drinks," Owen said getting out of the booth and walking over to the bar.
Harry looked at Morrigan and pondered whether or not he should ask her a question that had been playing on his mind. "What's up Harry?" She asked sensing his conundrum.
"Are you still with Sirius?" He asked.
"At the moment, yes, unless he's done something else I don't know about," she said mumbling the last part.
"When are you coming home then?" Harry asked.
'Home'. She hadn't really considered that Harry now thought of the place as home. She sighed, "Soon, I can't just avoid my problems forever."
Hermione sent her a gentle smile, "We listened in to his conversation with Molly. We used some of the extendable ears."
"God I hate those things," Morrigan commented.
"He's completely crushed. He doesn't know what to do without you," Hermione stated. "Molly told him that he needs to let you have your adventures. Let you live your life before trapping yourself in a house. He seems like he's making an effort."
"I'm sure he his," Morrigan said sincerely, "it's not that simple though. A lot has happened that you all haven't been around for. Right now I'm just trying to figure out what I want and where our relationship fits in with that."
"What if it doesn't?" Harry asked, "You two fought so hard to be together. When we all found out about your relationship it was... well... a mess. Would you give that up?"
"No Harry. I will always love him. It's just a matter of if he loves me enough to be the man that I need in my life."
"Well," Ron said, "If it doesn't work out with Sirius at least you've got Owen as a back up plan."
Morrigan rolled her eyes, "He's one of my closest friends. It's like pairing me up with Charlie!"
"You kissed Charlie," Hermione pointed out.
"One time!" Morrigan groaned, "And it was Remus's fault! Honestly thank Helga that this place doesn't have enchanted mistletoe or who knows which one of my friends I'd be snogging next!"
Owen catching the tail end of the conversation laughed, "Who's Morrigan snogging now? Bill? Come on, he's a taken man!"
"So funny," Morrigan pouted.
"Alright you three drink up and drag her home with you," Owen commanded staring Morrigan down, "you've stayed at mine long enough. You need to start the new year off with a clean slate. So you're going to chat to snuffles."
"But-"
"Nope." Owen said before she could protest. "You need to do this. You can't hide from your problems forever Morrigan."
"Fine," she huffed.
The four friends chatted casually in the pub finishing off their drinks before departing. Morrigan hugged Owen goodbye and he wished her luck. Their walk home was riddled with nerves. The trio wondered if Molly noticed that they had disappeared, and Morrigan was terrified of confronting Sirius. She chewed on her lip biting at the chapped dead skin until she had the faint taste of blood in her mouth.
They entered Grimmauld Place and immediately Molly Weasley descended on them. "How could you three leave without telling me, do you know how incredibly irresponsible it was? I know it was just the pub, but these are dangerous times for you to wander off!" She turned to Morrigan, "It's lovely to see you dear."
"Thank you Molly," Morrigan replied. She excused herself and went upstairs knocking on Sirius's door gently before entering.
He was laid on his bed reading a book, "Molly I'm alright I really don't-"
"It's not Molly," Morrigan said softly.
His eyes immediately met her silver ones. He threw the book to the side, jumping off of the bed and taking three large steps before engulfing her in a hug. His hand cradled the back of her head as he held her close. "Godric, I've missed you."
"I missed you too."
He pulled away from the hug and gently kissed her. He studied her face as if he hadn't seen it in years, taking in every detail and mark that it held. "I am so sorry Morrigan. I can't even begin to express how much of an asshole I've been. I have been so selfish and unfair to you and I-"
She threw her arms around him pulling him close to her and cried. He held her and gently brought her to to floor rubbing small circles on her back as she sobbed into his chest. What was a brilliantly prepared speech, was lost on deaf ears. His heart shattered hearing her sob so heavily, the only other time she cried like this was when she lost Cedric.
Eventually he felt her sobs stop, only small sniffles could be heard from her. "Morrigan-"
"Please," she begged, "is there anything else I don't know. That's all I need right now. I don't care if there is I just need the truth."
"The truth is, I have been a horrible boyfriend. That I kept this from you, yet was so hypocritical about you having your secrets. That I was jealous that you were spending all of your time with another man who I knew deserved you way more than I do. That I was selfish and didn't think about what you want in your future, all I cared about was me and it made you miserable. The truth is Morrigan that Owen was right, I don't deserve you, but I'm not keeping anything else from you."
She nodded and relaxed into him. "Don't hurt me like that again."
"Never," he said moving a stray lock of hair away from her face.
"I'm not kidding Sirius, the only reason I'm still here is because Owen managed to help me see why you're an idiot. You may hate him, but you owe him."
"I know," Sirius whispered. "I don't hate him though, I'm jealous of him, I hated how happy he made you, but you were right. Christmas was a one sided pissing contest."
"Mr. Diggory saw you watching over me, the night I went to Cedrics grave," she said seemingly out of the blue.
"I didn't want you to get hurt," he explained, "You were furious with me and you had every right to be, but I still want to keep you safe. I stood over you the entire time you slept, it sounds a bit creepy I know but-"
"It doesn't sound creepy at all," Morrigan thought aloud, her lips forming a small smile, "I'm glad you were there." That much was true, Morrigan was glad. She didn't think rationally when falling asleep next to Cedrics grave, anyone could have come along and found her. But Sirius stayed with her the entire night, and something about that truly made her feel loved.
"I love you," he said before kissing her gently almost as if he applied any more pressure she'd shatter into pieces in his hands.
"I love you too," she replied as they pulled away.
Sirius held her cheek in his hand, "I want to be better for you and I will be. So I'm going to make you promises I know I'll be able to keep. I'm going to support whatever you want to do, whether that's work at the pub or go to university, or stay in bed for the rest of your life. I'm going to do what I can to make your days easier, I'll learn to cook or do the laundry, just something so you can spend time with those you love when you get home. And I'm going to do everything I can to embrace any new people in your life. I promise I'll stop with the jealous pissing contests. I want to prove to everyone that I'm worth just a minute of your time."
"Sirius I-" she was at a loss for words. She had expected them to bicker, for him to be as stubborn as ever, but it seemed as though her heartbreak really forced him to look at their relationship with a different more fresh perspective, "thank you, but this doesn't mean that everything's okay. It's honestly so far from it."
"I know."
She shook her head, "I don't think you do. So I think it's time I move out."
His eyes filled with tears, "Move out?"
She nodded, "When we started this relationship it was a secret, we didn't have anything but each other and because of that it's morphed into this toxic codependency. I don't want to lose you, but I also can't live with you. I need my own space."
"Where will you go?" He asked forcing out the words.
She sighed, "I might stay with the Diggory's for a while. Then maybe I'll look around at flats. I'll stay safe and out of sight, but I need to do this for me."
He couldn't bear to look into her eyes so his gaze focused on the floorboards, "Will I still see you?"
"Yeah," Morrigan said, "Just not as often."
"Why does this feel like the beginning of the end?"
"Because it's the start of something different," Morrigan said, "Our relationships changed. It isn't just fun and sexy flirting, or comforting each other in times of need. We need to figure out how to be a couple."
He shook his head, "Morrigan, you must know I love you. I don't know how else to show we're a couple."
"You have to understand that I love you too, but these past four months we've done nothing but fight, and it's just not sustainable. I want to fight for us, not fight you," she explained, "I really hope you can see that."
"So what are we meant to do? How do I see you?"
"You write, like a normal couple. We miss each other, we talk about our days, I come and visit, you ask me to come over. We work things out. You're not going to be stuck in here forever Sirius and we need to figure out how to be normal before it's too late."
"What about Kreacher?" Sirius asked, "He's been miserable since you left."
She pursed her lips, "Joint custody?"
Sirius couldn't help but chuckle, "Sounds good Morrigan." A thought dawned upon him as he stood up and rummaged around one of the drawers in the room. Morrigan watched on confused. "Everything happened so quickly on Christmas I didn't have the chance to give you your gift."
"Oh," she said realizing that he was right.
"Merry Christmas love."
She took the parcel out from his hands and unwrapped it. She looked at the small velvet box and opened it, her eyes finding a beautiful silver necklace with a simple diamond in the center. She gasped admiring the piece in her hands, "It's stunning."
"I'm not going to say the classic 'like you'," Sirius joked, "But you outshine it any day."
"Thank you," she said pressing her lips to his.
Morrigan ventured to find the twins hoping to catch up with them before she left to go to the Diggory's for the evening. She could hear them just outside of the door to their room bickering over order forms and price per item. The two boys were trouble, and their grades left much to be desired, but they were extremely intelligent. Especially when it came to business.
She opened the door, "Hello you two."
"She returns," Fred cheered, "we were worried the handsome barman had taken you away from us forever."
"Are you ever going to call him by his name?"
"Never," They said simultaneously.
She giggled sitting down with the two boys. George eyed her, "What's going on Morrigan? You seem... fake happy."
"Fake happy?"
"Your smile it's kinda creepy," Fred replied looking at her suspiciously.
She sighed, "I'm moving out."
"Really?" George said surprised, "And going where exactly? Did you and Sirius split?"
"No!" She said quickly, "No, I just realized that living together with all of the pressure of the war and taking care of Harry, and Sirius's jealousy... it wasn't healthy. I think a bit of space and having the chance to miss each other is what we need."
Fred nodded understanding the point she was making, "Actually, no offense Morrigan, but this could be useful."
"My disaster of a love life is useful? Joy." She rolled her eyes but jokingly nudged them after.
"We're looking for a space for the shop, we need someone to decorate it and live in it before we are able to open it. We want to start leasing it so we can get business up and running as soon as we're done with Hogwarts." Fred explained his smile growing wide, "And you need a place to live temporarily."
"So why not decorate and live in the shop! You won't have to pay rent, just help us decorate and do up the place as payment. We'll cover supplies of course."
Morrigan pursed her lips as she thought about the arrangement, but eventually grinned, "Deal." She looked between the two boys, "Have you picked somewhere yet?"
"Yes," They answered.
"We want to take over this shop," George said pointing at the paper, "two bed flat above the space and it's right in the middle of Diagon Alley."
"This is great, but I'm supposed to be in some sort of hiding, wouldn't me living in the middle of Diagon Alley draw some form of attention?" Morrigan asked nervously.
Fred shrugged, "Don't think so, plus Bill will be close by if you run into any trouble. Maybe just wear a hat over the hair."
"A hat, why have I not thought of such a brilliant idea? I could definitely leave the house safely now while wearing a hat!" Morrigan cheered sarcastically.
The boys laughed at her display and began devising their plan with her. For the first time in a while Morrigan felt as though everything would be okay.