emotional chapter
⚠️tw: ed behavior and other sensitive content including self harm.
May 6th, 2020
Leaving Texas
But first some more content
joshrichards
joshrichards janthony in Texas
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2.9M
💬
13.7k
giorgiamallette Anthony put that tongue away- were not going through this again
Liked By Creator
luvanthony I do what I want.
nessabarrett hey you're cute
Liked By Creator
joshrichards so are you 😍😉
user187 lighting 😍
giorgiamallette
giorgiamallette 🤠 squad @taylerholder @jadenhossler @kelianneskankus @natewyatt @hootiehurley
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13.6M
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52.8k
jadenhossler I believe I can fly 😍
Liked By Creator
useriggy when Tayler fell 😭
Liked By Creator
taylerholder we don't talk about that
user71 that should be Mads.
user1234 back off Mads' man.
user926 Mads > Giorgia
user007 I LOVE YOU AND JADEN
taylerholder
taylerholder Josh's twerking is superior @joshrichards @giorgiamallette
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2.8M
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14.6k
user12385 Jaden and Giorgia 🥺
user582 no.
user8295 josh said 🥢
joshfan it looked at me first 👀
brycehall
brycehall last day in Texas
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4.2M
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giorgiamallette you guys almost trampled me
brycehall not our fault you can't keep up
braddisonbabes she ruined braddison 🤬
brycehall she did nothing wrong.
user7263 she needs to pick a guy already 🙄
keliannestankus
keliannestankus Texas was fun @giorgiamallette @natewyatt @joshrichards
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3.7M
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17.9k
joshrichards guys stop I only look at @nessabarrett 's cake 🍰
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user726 Josh totally checked out Giorgia 💀
user12851 ya know... josh and giorgia would actually be cute
user627 first she ruins jads, then braddison, now she's coming for jessa? HELL NO
user007 yall he was just dancing omg
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brycehall
brycehall definitely my arms @jadenhossler
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2.9M
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jadenhossler ayee we have matching tattoos
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giorgiamallette I like your arms Bryce, can I get a hug?
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jadenhossler i'd hug you all day babe 😉
user007 @jadenhossler you'd do more than hug her
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samhurley
samhurley goodbye Texas @joshrichards
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1.3M
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6927
joshrichards i'll miss you brother ❤️
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samhurley I'll come to Sway soon
Narrative
After Giorgia woke up this morning she ended up seeing tiktokroom and immediately her day was ruined. So was Jaden's because ever since that his girlfriend had completely avoided him, hasn't spoken to him. No good morning, nothing.
In fact Giorgia said goodbye to everyone except the Sway boys and left before one of the guys could stop her. She texted Anthony that she was driving back alone and Jaden would have to go with them since they had an extra seat anyways.
What was on tiktokroom? Well here ya go:
⚠️Tw: brutal hate
tiktokroom
liked by madslewis, and 79,853 others
tiktokroom people think the song in the background sounds like Giorgia. They are assuming it's about the Mads situation.
madslewis lol... good to know.
birdie.bitch I KNEW SHE BROKE THEM UP ON PURPOSE
user007 its a good song though...
giorgiamallette yes it is my singing. I'll go live and explain it later tonight when I'm back in LA. It's not what it seems, this wasn't supposed to get out before I explained...
madslewis explained what exactly? Deciding you were bored and maliciously breaking up me and Jaden just so he could be your sex toy?
tiktokroom
liked by amydenaehossler, and 82,725 others
tiktokroom Mads breaks down on live over her breakup with Jaden.
birdie.mads this is just 40 seconds of a much longer live... the poor girl couldn't even breathe 🥺🥺
user26 fuck jaden. fuck giorgia. this girl clearly cares about him more than anyone and he threw her away for that trash.
amydenaehossler aw Mads hunny... stay strong, you'll be okay.
user72 why tf did they have to rub it in her face that their hooking up. We get it, you guys are fuck buddies. Whatever. Fuck off.
user62 poor Mads 🥺
user173 Giorgia should fucking die. Look what she did!
user827 Giorgia should never have been at sway in the first place.
user02 Mads we love you, it's okay. He's just stupid.
user21 Giorgia does not deserve a platform.
user007 for what? Liking someones ex? You sound ridiculous.
user152 Giorgia's a fat pig and should just kill herself.
Narrative
The long drive back to LA gave Giorgia a lot of time to think. She hated herself for hurting Mads that bad. She hated Mads for taking it to the internet. She hated the world for making her feel like shit for falling in love.
When she finally got back to her apartment she saw that Dixie was still in Connecticut, it was just her.
Giorgia immediately went to the liquor cabinet and started chugging vodka straight from the bottle, she almost threw up in the process but held it in.
She hasn't eaten a full meal in a week and a half now, almost 2. Almost anything she has eaten she made herself throw up. This meant her body was already weak and it didn't take much for her to get very drunk.
Giorgia felt as though she was the bad guy in this situation, she never meant for things to be like this, she just wanted to be happy and in love. Nothing ever works out for her though.
She felt as though she should break up with Jaden. He loved Mads before, he'll be able to love her again. Then they can be happy and Mads won't be hurting and crying on live.
⚠️self harm trigger warning.
Giorgia couldn't take this hurt right now... so she did something she's never done before. She went to the bathroom and found a blade... she needed immediate relief and her nails just weren't gonna be enough this time.
She held the tip of the blade against her skin and started crying hard. Jaden would be so hurt if he found out she did this...
So he just can't find out.
She felt that she deserved the pain anyways so she proceeded to make 5 cuts. One for hurting Mads to the point she cried on live. One for kissing Bryce in order to make Jaden jealous. One for falling for another girl's boyfriend. One for making Jaden have to deal with all of her suffering. And finally one for Amy, she'll never be good enough for her son.
The cuts weren't very deep but it was still her opening the floodgates of a whole new chapter of her unhealthy coping.
Meanwhile in the Sway Car...
Bryce was driving them back, everyone let Jaden take shotgun since he needed space the most. He was having a lot of Anxiety over Giorgia. She wasn't answering his calls, she hadn't spoken to him all day.
He was told that there was a video of Mads crying over him on live but he refused to watch it. He didn't wanna be made to feel guilty just for loving Giorgia. Break ups happen all the time, it's been nearly three months now and Mads needs to move on.
Him and Anthony have been trying to call Giorgia all day, they were still an hour away from LA and Jaden was freaking out that he wasn't there next to his girlfriend. He could feel it, she wasn't okay. Obviously she wasn't- she's been made out as the bad guy online. But the fact that she left alone without telling him scared him... she didn't want him to be there for her... she wanted to be left alone to do what she needed to do to cope- but if it had to be alone theres no way it was healthy.
Jaden- FUCK! Bryce you have to drive faster.
He got frustrated at the sound of her voicemail again.
Anthony- Jaden... I think you need to stop calling her. Let me talk to her first.
Jaden- dude shut up. No. I need to see that she's okay.
Anthony looked at Josh in the middle seat in the back, he'd been texting Josh about his worries with this... he didn't wanna scare Jaden but he needed to talk to her before Jaden.
Josh- Jaden he's her best friend, listen to him.
Jaden- no. I need her to be okay, I need to hear from her that she's okay.
Griffin- well clearly she's not, if Anthony says that he thinks he should talk to her first maybe-
Jaden- give me one good reason Anthony.
Anthony- cause if you talk to her first she's gonna dump you and then we'll have two already struggling and now heartbroken teens to deal with! She's going to break up with you if someone else doesn't calm her down first!
He finally snapped and spit out his reason, this made Jaden go quiet in his thoughts. He knew Anthony was right, she's gonna think she's the bad guy right now and she'll wanna make it right. But he still needed to know she was safe... cause he knew she wasn't but he was praying that she'd prove him wrong.
Jaden- then let her. I don't care.
Jaden replied, all of the guys now went silent at his response.
Jaden- I'll get her back eventually, but for now I need to see to it that she's okay and no offense Anthony, you may be her best friend but I'm the one that's helped her through the kinda shit I'm worried about right now and I'm not about to stop. She can dump me if she feels the need but I'm not leaving her side until she's okay and once she's in her right mind again she won't want to break up... I hope.
Anthony was the only one who knew what he meant by "the kinda shit i'm worried about". Jaden was worried she'd hurt herself, so was Anthony. But Jaden had a point, he's the one who understands this part of her, he's the one who even noticed it in the first place. Anthony backed off of telling Jaden what to do... he may be Giorgia's best friend but Jaden knew what to do better than him.
Bryce ended up speeding, just enough that a cop wouldn't bother pulling them over but it cut the hour down to 40 minutes. He drove straight to Giorgia's apartment rather than Sway and let Jaden and Anthony go in.
The two boys were on the list of people who could go up anytime, the apartment complex had very high security and so Jaden and Anthony both had to show ID and have it confirmed that they were on the list.
Jaden had a key to her apartment and so the two boys ran up the stairs and straight i to the apartment.
Jaden- Giorgia?
Jaden called out as soon as they entered the apartment. They noticed the open bottle of vodka on the counter and the bathroom light was on. The sound of Giorgia throwing up rang through the apartment.
Immediately the two boys ran to the bathroom and Jaden got down on his knees next to her. He pulled her hair back as she threw up from how much vodka she'd drank.
Jaden- aw angel...
His heart broke from her weak state. Tears filled his eyes as well as Anthony's as they watched the girl in pain.
Anthony- hey boo...
Anthony say down next to the toilet and gave her a sweet smile as she looked up at him with mascara down her face, her eyes red and puffy.
Giorgia- I didn't invite you guys over.
Anthony- no you didn't... but here we are anyways.
Jaden used the elastic he always kept on his wrist for her to put her hair back as he grabbed her hands and checked her palms, nothing there- that was a good sign to him.
Jaden- did you do anything?
She knew exactly what he meant, they all did. But she wasn't going to let them down, so she lied and kept the evidence hidden under the sleeves of her hoodie.
Giorgia- besides drink almost half a bottle of vodka? No.
Jaden nodded and pulled her frail body into a hug, she didn't hug back though. He knew what that meant and braced himself for what Anthony had warned him of.
Giorgia- Anthony... can you give us a minute?
She glanced at her best friend who sighed and nodded at he shot Jaden a sympathetic look. Even though he had warned Jaden and they both knew what was coming he knew it was going to hit the boy hard.
Jaden- angel... i love you so much
He gently ran his thumb over her cheek as he prayed that Anthony was wrong.
Giorgia- please don't say that right now...
She spoke with tears in her eyes as she had to look away from the boy she loved.
Jaden- please don't say what you're about to say...
Giorgia- J... Mads she-
Jaden- no. We aren't talking about her. She's me EX. She's in the past. She has nothing to do with us, right now.
Giorgia- she needs you...
Jaden- i need YOU.
Giorgia- Jaden please don't make this harder than it needs to be.
Jaden- Angel... don't do this, I know you don't want to do this. Please.
Giorgia- I have to- look what we're doing to Mads
Jaden- no- look what Mads did to you... she never should have brought this online.
Giorgia- everyone thinks i'm the bad guy j...
Jaden- you're not. Screw them, they don't know what their talking about. You're not the bad guy, there's no "bad guy". This isn't some Disney movie this is life, in life people hurt sometimes. Mads is in one of those times, it is not your fault.
Giorgia- Jaden...
Jaden- please angel... breaking up with me won't fix anything. I won't go back to Mads. I won't give up until I get you back. We talked about this a couple weeks ago... I'm gonna marry you Giorgia Eden Mallette- or rather... Hossler.
He smiled and placed his forehead on hers.
Jaden- we're inevitable. Mads will be okay, she'll move on. I'm not going back to her though, even if you dump me I'm still going to be right here next to you.
Giorgia- like a lost puppy?
They both laughed a little as he nodded.
Jaden- it'd probably look like that but it wouldn't be like that. Cause I know that as long as I'm with you I'm not lost, if I'm with you I'm home and I'm safe.
A tear slipped down Giorgia's face as Jaden caught it with his thumb and wiped it away.
Jaden- please don't push me away.
He begged as Giorgia finally cracked and nodded as she pulled him into a hug. His body finally relaxed in her embrace.
Jaden- you scared the shit out of me there.
Giorgia- keep you on your toes
She teased as he let out a soft laugh.
Jaden- how's your stomach feel? You done throwing up?
She nodded as he smiled and stood up, offering her a hand to get up. As she stood up she got very light headed and almost fell back down.
Jaden- woah- what happened?
He asked as he caught her and held her against him for stability.
Giorgia- just light headed... I'm okay
Jaden knew something wasn't right, he still wasn't fully sure what happened before he got here. He'd just figure that out later though.
Anthony- you guys okay?
Anthony smiled as the still together couple came out into the living room, Jaden gently leading her to the couch next to Anthony.
Jaden- we worked it out... everything's fine
He smiled at Anthony who was genuinely impressed, Giorgia is usually too stubborn to reason with.
Jaden- anyways.. my phone's almost dead, can I go borrow a charger from your room?
He asked as Giorgia nodded in return before going back to talking to her best friend.
Jaden took the opportunity to go back into her bathroom and look around for anything to tell him the full story. The first thing he checked was the medicine, it all seemed to be how he'd last seen it. So he started looking around for something else, he knew there had to be more to it.
About 10 minutes later after deciding fuck it and searching threw her trash, he found the blade. It looked clean since she'd washed it off but that didn't stop his heart from dropping.
He wrapped it in toilet paper as cushioning as he put it in his pocket. Jaden would get rid of it himself, somewhere she can't find it again.
When he went back out to the living room he finally took notice to the fact that she was wearing a red and black hoodie... it was hot in the apartment, air conditioning had been off while they were gone and it was just kicking back in.
Giorgia- why are you just standing there like that?
She turned and looked at her boyfriend who was just starring at her as the pieces all came together in his mind.
Jaden- it happened... I warned you when I first found out, I warned you one day it wouldn't be enough and now it happened... you had been doing so well angel
His gaze went soft as he looked at the girl he loved, knowing she'd cut herself.
Flashback to February 7th, 2020...
Jaden- what? You're like one of the most confident people I've ever met.
He looked back up at Giorgia confused as she barely held herself together. She'd already opened up, she refuses to let herself cry in front of him now too.
Giorgia- it's easier to act confident then it is to talk about whats wrong.
Jaden- damn, I never would have guessed.
Giorgia- yeah thats kinda the whole point
She laughed softly as she put her hands in her lap instead of on the counter.
Jaden- I know how you feel about the whole not enough thing.
Giorgia- I'm sorry, I killed the vibe
Jaden- oh stop, I'm glad you told me. It means a lot that you trusted me with it, seriously.
Their eyes met and Giorgia felt tears building up in her eyes, she dug her fingernails into her inner thigh to distract from the racing thoughts. He noticed and quickly grabbed her hand to stop her and pulled it away from the girl's lap still holding it.
Jaden- please dont
He spoke softly.
Giorgia- I'm fine, just a habit
Jaden- G, you broke skin
He sighed as he shifted her leg so he could better see her inner thigh where there was now 4 red crescent moon shapes.
Giorgia- barely, its no big deal.
She defended herself and squeezed her legs shut hiding the marks before he noticed the other ones too. Digging her nails into her thigh, palm, or arm is how she distracts herself when nothing else works.
Jaden- is this a normal thing for you?
Giorgia- you need to chill, it's not like I'm cutting myself.
Jaden- does Anthony know?
Giorgia- theres nothing to know.
Jaden- G, please
Giorgia- Jaden it's not a big deal, let it go
As she shifted her body off the counter and tried to leave Jaden grabbed her wrist causing the girl to stop.
Jaden- wait, I can't just let it go
Giorgia- why not?
She said getting frustrated with him.
Jaden- cause- cause I know whats down that road and I can't watch it happen
Giorgia- nothings gonna happen, it's harmless, like snapping a rubber band on my wrist
Jaden- it starts harmless, until the pressures not enough anymore so you squeeze harder and harder until you're nails aren't enough and you turn to something more.
She turned towards him realizing what he meant.
Jaden- please
Giorgia- I- um... I'll try
He was more serious then she'd ever seen him before, this hit close to home for him. Using his grip on her wrist he pulled her towards him and into a hug as she melted into his embrace.
Back to the present...
Giorgia- how'd you figure it out?
She sighed in defeat, lying wouldn't save her now.
Jaden- I found it in your trash
He went and sat down next to her as Anthony looked at the pair confused.
Giorgia- i'm so sorry Jaden...
Jaden- dont apologize to me, you didn't do anything to apologize for.
He pulled her into a hug as she started crying again.
Anthony looked at Jaden confused. Jaden reached into his pocket and grabbed the wad of toilet paper at her held the girl and let her cry against his chest.
Anthony unwrapped the toilet paper and found the blade, immediately his face dropped as he looked to Jaden who was also holding in tears.
The two boys silently looked at each other for a moment before Anthony rewrapped the blade and gave it back to Jaden.
Jaden- angel... can I see it? I don't want it to get infected.
She nodded as he led her into the main bathroom, he didn't want to take her back to hers right now when that's where this happened.
The next day... Jaden didn't let her address it that night because he wanted her to just relax and come down from the emotional day she'd had.
Giorgia- hey guys... so I said I was going to address the song on live so here I am...
She took a deep breath as Jaden smiled at her reassuring her from the other side of the camera.
Giorgia- okay so if you've been on tiktokroom in the past two days you've probably seen that clip of my unreleased song... I know it sounds harsh and mean but it's not based in reality.
She took a deep breath before continuing to explain... her mind was divided between this and food because Jaden had been with her ALL day and so she had to eat and couldn't throw it up.
Giorgia- It's based on how social media twisted the situation. I never would steal someone's boyfriend. Jaden broke up with her of his own freewill, I didn't even know until hours afterwards when I found out on social media. This next part I do want to clarify that Jaden okay'd me saying this...
She glanced at Jaden who nodded to tell her it was still okay for her to say. He knew he'd probably get some hate for the situation but it was worth it if she'll get less.
Giorgia- the truth of the matter it that I actually had to push Jaden away a bit while they were together because he'd let certain boundaries of 'things you just don't do with another girl when you have a girlfriend' slip his mind. He didn't cheat on her but he definitely made his interest in me clear. Jaden and I had a thing last summer and those feelings weren't completely gone. It was only a thing when I would come to Sway so most of their relationship I wasn't on his mind but I am technically the reason the didn't break up sooner, I kept pushing him away and back to Mads. I even tried to do that yesterday after seeing Mads' live.
She to another deep breath to keep herself together at the thought of yesterday.
Giorgia- the song is based on the hate I got at the time. Everyone saying that I broke them up and I was a bad person. It made me believe I was a bad person too, just like yesterday did. I don't talk much about my feelings on social media but I have a lot of struggles that people don't know about. In fact Jaden is the only person who knows all of the different things I've dealt with- at least the stuff I've dealt with recently. He's been my biggest support the past few months and I don't want to be made to feel guilty for that.
Out of view of the camera Jaden gave her hand a squeeze to reassure her he was there.
Giorgia- anyways I just wanted to quickly address that. But i do have one more thing to say before I go... in two days I have my second song coming out and I'd really appreciate if you all would give it a listen. No it's not 'Pacify Her'- this one is actually based in reality and is more raw than I usually am with social media. It's called 'Unloveable' and it's about how I felt a couple months ago in the beginning of my relationship with Jaden and then again yesterday when I started to doubt everything and believe I was the bad guy again. I'm not asking you to listen to it for money, I just want you guys to hear how I felt. As I said, it's going to be more real than I've been on social media.
Her eyes scanned the comments and made her realize she had said "a couple months ago the beginning of my relationship with Jaden"... she didn't mean to let that slip.
Giorgia- anyways... I'm gonna go. But I do really quickly want to publicly apologize to Mads. That song was not supposed to get out before I could explain it, I know that must have hurt but I hope you understand that I didn't mean any of that, it is based in the false reality of social media. I would never mean to hurt you.
May 9th, 2020
Real song:
'Unloveable' by Delacey
xoxo kayla
This was a very emotional chapter and I apologize if I made you cry... I had to stop writing like 5 times cause I started crying lol
Jaden and Giorgia did not break up though...
I love you guys and I hope you all are doing alright, I'm sorry if you struggle with any of the things mentioned in this chapter, I've dealt with this shit and its not fun. Please stay strong luvs ❤️❤️❤️
Oh and Happy 20th Birthday Jaden Isaiah Hossler! 🎉
Anyways I love you all so so much 😘