Alan Rickman one shots: smutt & fluff

Another love -pt 1-

( snape ) 📜🖤 -another love
-part 1-

I started this probably two months ago 😬 I'm finishing some drafts tonight. Also sorry for so many snape stories, he's one of my comfort characters so I like to write about him a lot but I have some other non snape drafts as well 😊
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It was Christmas eve. I stood in my chambers, pacing around, slightly biting my nails.

I knew I had to tell him.
I knew I couldn't keep it to myself any longer.

Since I first started working as a librarian at Hogwarts, the moment I had set eyes on Snape, I knew I was bound to deeply fall for him.
It's been quite some time, and I found myself falling more and more for the potions professor ever day.

Before I could change my mind, I made my way to find him and confess everything.

Walking down the hallways, illuminated by candles, I stopped asking myself where he could be and in the middle of my thoughts-

" y/n"

I turned around quickly to be met with the dark and tall figure of Snape.

"Oh.. Severus" we were on first name basis which I always thought was nice.
"I was- I was looking for you."

"You were..?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Yes, actually I was.." I walked a bit closer to him.
I played with my hands a bit, intertwining my fingers.

"Did you need some-"

"I love you" I blurted out all of a sudden.
"I know you might be confused, but I.. I love you, so much. You might not think of me as anything or anyone but everytime I am around you, my heart flutters and I can't help but think to myself 'I love this man so much.' I smile like an idiot even when you aren't looking, and- and you just make me so happy. I can't explain it. I love you, and I want to be with you more than anything."

He stood, staring.
"y/n I.. you don't.. -love me."

"Yes I do" I reassured him.

"No, no you don't. You just think you do. You don't."

"Yes.. I do Severus"

It was clear that he didn't return my feelings.

There was a brief pause before he spoke again, but truthful, I didn't want to listen. I knew the heartbreak was coming.

"y/n.. I don't love you. You are my colleague. While I do spend time with you and .. enjoy our conversations.. that does not mean I return your feelings."

And just like that.. the heartbreak came.

"Oh.. yes, well I- I figured you would say something like that."
As hard as I tried to hide the look of sadness from my face, I could feel a tear running down my face.
I wiped it away and turned away too embarrassed to face him.
I began to walk away, going back to my room.

Once in, I shut the door and slumped into my bed trying hard to contain my tears but of course failing.
I knew it would happen, I knew it would hurt, I just didn't know how bad it would hurt. Some part of me thought that maybe he would love me back.

Memories of Snape and I flashed before me. The first time we met, we ran into the library together on my second day of work. Our first Christmas together; we stood in the snow, snowflakes fell onto our hair and clothes. The first time he ever smiled at me.

I sobbed harder as each memory popped into my head, each burning my heart with pain hurting to much to think of them.

Just then as I was about to clean myself up, there was a knock at the door.
I wiped away my tears and tried to make myself look presentable and not like I was crying my eyes out.
"Just a minute"  I shouted as I splashed my face with cold water from the bathroom sink and pulled on an oversized grey sweatshirt.