Till The End | h.p

assault

Her heart feels so heavy. She does love Harry, she knows that, but her brain feels numb because she's just so terrified. It's not fair to Harry, he doesn't deserve to be trapped with that. Things between them were so much better, but she feels so broken because she can't even remember how it felt to not be so scared. She tries to distract herself with the match, but her mind keeps switching back to Harry and then to Blaise.

When Gryffindor wins, they decide to celebrate with a party in their common room. As soon as the team walks in, everyone cheers loudly, especially for Ron. Upon seeing Harry, Sam immediately heads up to her dorm. He sighs and stands over in the corner, but smiles as everyone cheers for Ron. Hermione stands next to him.

"You really shouldn't have done it."

"I know," he smirks, "I suppose I could've just used a Confundus Charm."

He looks to her expectantly and she stutters, "That was different. That was tryouts. This was an actual game."

He pulls the vial out of his front pocket and holds it up to her. She notices that it's still completely full.

"You didn't put it in," he shakes his head, "Ron only thought you did," he smiles and nods as they both turn back to watch everyone cheer for him.

Suddenly, Lavender pulls him towards her and kisses him passionately. Hermione's mouth falls open and Harry cheers him on as he wraps his arm around her waist. Hermione turns around and walks out of the common room. When Harry turns around, he doesn't see her beside him anymore. He follows her out of the common room and finds her in a secluded room, crying. Birds fly all around the room, chirping.

He steps into the room and stands beside her. He points to the birds and she states, "Charms spell. I'm just practicing."

"Well, they're really good," he points out as he sits down next to her.

"How does it feel, Harry? To not be with Sam?"

He looks at her, not knowing what to say, but Ron and Lavender run into the room. They stop when their eyes fall on Harry and Hermione.

"Whoops," Lavender giggles, "Looks like this room's taken."

She pulls on his arm, but he stands still as she walks out to look for another one.

"What's with the birds?" He asks.

Hermione stands and glares at him, "Oppugno."

The birds form into a line and fly straight towards Ron's head. He ducks and they disappear into the wall. He looks stunned and quickly runs out of the room. Hermione sniffles and sits back down next to Harry. She lays her head on his shoulder and cries. He wraps his arm around her shoulders.

"It feels like this," he states.

After awhile, they walk back up to the common room and Hermione stops him, "Wait a few minutes outside my door, I'll slide her journal underneath. You deserve to know, but Harry, it will hurt."

He nods slowly and does as she orders. He waits until he sees the journal slide underneath the door. He bends down and picks it up. He stares at the door for a moment before turning and walking into his own dormitory. He sits down on his bed and looks at the journal hesitantly. It feels wrong to go through her private things, but he needs to know what's going on, so he might be able to fix it. He slowly opens it and flips to the middle of the journal where the first journal entry of the term is.

'September 15th, 1996

I can't breathe. I don't even want to breathe anymore. I don't deserve to breathe. All of this power and I can't save anyone. I couldn't even save myself against a sixteen year old boy. I feel weak and I feel dirty. I showered for two hours today as I rubbed my skin raw until it was red. I was walking through the halls, after Harry and I went to Hogsmeade. The day was so perfect, I was so happy, until I ran into Aaron. He looked me up and down... I had already felt violated by the way he was staring me down. He shoved me against the wall...'

Harry notices the tear stains that smeared the ink. Rage begins to fill his body and he fights to get through the entry.

'He ran his hands down my body and I tried to scream, but he wrapped his hands around my throat. I was so scared, I was so scared and I just couldn't do anything. He lifted my skirt and... I can't write this. I just can't.'

Harry feels his body grow hotter and all he can see is red. It was his job to protect her. How could he leave her alone. He had gone to visit Dumbledore that night, he remembers vividly. He tries to read through the several other entries, but his vision becomes blurred and he slams it shut. He throws the journal across the room and kicks his dresser. Ron walks in that moment, and sees the mess.

"Bloody hell, what's going on?"

Harry points to the journal, "Read the entry of September 15th."

Ron picks it up and sits on his bed as he reads. His heart drops and he lets the journal fall to the floor. Harry sits on his own bed once more and lets his head fall into his hands. He lets his tears fall silently.

"We were supposed to protect her..." Ron says as his eyes water, "Fred and George they told me- I would've anyway, but they were so adamant. I failed them... Godric, I failed HER."

"I promised Sirius, I promised her. I was supposed to keep her safe. I was supposed to keep her safe!" Harry yells and his face turns into pure rage.

They sit there as their bodies heat up in anger, "Aaron McLattery? The Slytherin Keeper?" He pauses, "I want him dead," Ron states firmly, "I want him out of here."

Harry nods, but Ron continues, "I want him to suffer as much as she is right now."

"He will," Harry assures, "I won't let him walk away from this."

"Should we tell the twins?" Ron asks as his eyes become downcast.

Harry inhales deeply, "Sam doesn't even want us knowing, I- they would be torn up."

"They'll find out quickly over break anyway, though. If she can't even be touched. Harry, you should've seen her last night. I just approached her and she began to shake and she pushed herself so far away from me. God, it hurts," he rubs his hands down his face.

Harry looks up at the ceiling, "What are we going to do?"

"I don't know."