Red vs Blue (Male OC Insert) [Being heavily overhauled]

Revelation Chapter 8: Perusing The Archive

Simmons: (sigh) Sorry Sir. It's a concealed door.

Sarge: That's better.

Grif: How did they open it?

Simmons: They talked to that computer. They got it to open the door by posing as members of Project Freelancer. If we pose as agents, it'll probably let us in too.

Grif: Aren't agents like tough, and good at things?

Simmons: We all just pick a State name and call ourselves by that. You know, like Agent Washington. Grif, name a State.

Grif: What is this, a pop quiz? Uuh, let's see, uh the Manhattan. No? Uhh, Europe.

Simmons: Wow. Really?

Grif: Pacific Ocean?

Simmons: Stop guessing. Just be Agent Alaska. How 'bout you Sarge?

Sarge: I'll be Secret Agent Double Ohio. License to be tall in the middle, and round on both ends.

Simmons: And I'll be Agent Denial. Yehehit's, because a state of denial, like the saying? You know, it's like a, I was, you know, the whole State/state thing? You know it's a, joke.

Grif: No dude, jokes are funny.

Simmons: Hhh, let's just go.

Cut to Washington leading the Meta, who's dragging the cement wall with an embedded Doc through the desert

Washington: The recovery beacon leads here. It's weak, but I can still pick it up. ...Here. Meta, dig.

Meta: (something)

Washington: Hey, I'm not gonna argue with you about this. You want a chance at that A.I.? I track, you dig. Otherwise, you can wander the desert by yourself, and see if you find him on your own.

Meta: (something)

Washington: Because I found the signal. You dig. We all have to pull our own weight.

The Meta looks back at Doc encased in frozen carbonite

Washington: Right, and other people's weight too. Just dig.

The Meta starts digging

Doc: Man, some people just can't take orders. Am I right?

Washington: Shut up, we're not friends.

Doc: Can I at least get a drink of water?

Washington: Shut up. I already asked you if you were thirsty before we left.

Doc: Yeah we're in the desert! Thirsty should be assumed.

Washington: You can drink later.

Doc: Yeah, this might be a bad time to tell you that I'm sinking then.

Washington: ...I hate you.

Doc: I know.

The Meta stops digging

Doc: Can we- what're you guys doing over there?

Wash looks down into the Meta's hole and sees a severed head, or else he was buried standing up

Washington: What the- is that C.T.? That's impossible, what's she doing out here?

Doc: What're you looking at?

Meta: (something)

Washington: Don't bother. She didn't get an A.I., remember?

Doc: Down in front!

Washington: Scavenge her for equipment, see what you can...

The aliens provide an audience for them

Washington: ...find.

Doc: Well, this is just fuckin' great.

Let's see what Ghost, The Girls, Church and Caboose are up to, roaming the halls together until they come to a room filled with Church bodies

Caboose: Oh my God! Look at all the yous! You're everywhere! Why this is like a Best Friend Store, and this is the greatest store ever! You can have your body back! Now which one do you want? I wanna buy one.

Ghost: Just, stop kid.

Church: I'm not looking for that.

A person-sized cryo chamber opens in front of Church

Church: I'm looking, for this.

Caboose: Oh.

Connie: No, fucking, way.

Sister: And I thought we finally got rid of you.

South: Isn't she supposed to be dead?

Ghost: Well this is interesting.

Dhuka: Well... I see a lot of blood in our future.

Ghost: Yeah... but mostly for Tucker and the reds.