Red vs Blue (Male OC Insert) [Being heavily overhauled]

Reconstruction Season 6 Chapter 15

Church: All the guards? Whu- yuh- wait, wh-why are we taking Church, again?

Washington: Just keep the guards off of us, and we'll radio when we're in position. This will be our extraction point.

Grif: Keep them off you?

Washington: Yeah.

Church: Distract them, dipshit.

Grif: How?

Washington: Well, this is the center that came up with all the ridiculous scenarios you guys have suffered through over the years. So have fun. Break some shit.

Sister: Now I can do that!

Cut to Washington walking Church up to a checkpoint with two guards in front of a door

Guard 1: Hold on, don't come any closer. I need you to stay right there, Sir.

Washington: Understood. I need access to the next level. The Counsellor wants to interrogate another survivor from Outpost 17B.

Guard 1: What? I thought all the Blues at Valhalla were dead. Where'd this one come from?

Washington: I don't have to explain anything to you, soldier. Stand down.

Guard 1: Sorry Sir, I didn't mean anything by that-

Washington: Fine. I'll let it go. As you were.

Guard 1: Something doesn't seem right to me. I'm gonna have to call this in.

Washington: Absolutely. Call it in. Let me just NOW!

Washington drops one guard, and Church drops to a knee and empties his entire clip at the other guard at point blank range and hits nothing but air. Hint; the guard is not Agent Smith

Church: ... ... Uh, hey can I get a little help I'm, out of bullets.

Washington shoots the other guard in the face.

Church: Thanks.

Cut back to the Reds, Ghost, Sister, South, Dhuka and Caboose

Simmons: This patrol was seventeen seconds late. Who's runnin' this place? How inefficient. Sloppy...

Dhuka: Shut up you stupid human.

Simmons: I liked you better when you didn't speak english.

South: Shut up dick-for-brains.

Simmons: Yes mam.

Sarge: I'm bored outta my gourd.

Grif: So what? Bored is good. Bored means we're not dying. Boredom I can deal with. I have years of practice.

Caboose: Yes! Grif talked, I won, I won the who can be the quietest game again.

Grif: Yeah, good job. That's ten in a row for you Caboose. Hey, you know what? We should play again. Best eleven out of twenty-one.

Caboose: Yes. You're all going down.

Simmons: Heh. We should try holding our breath next.

Sarge: Well that's it. I can't stand just sittin' around. I'm goin' mad with anticipation.

Simmons: We've only been here twelve minutes.

Sarge: Are you sure? My mission clock says three days.

Simmons: *sigh* That's because you wouldn't synchronize at the start of the mission, remember? I said we should synchronize, and you said "Why would we synchronize? It's like we're in the future, seeing what the enemy does before they do it. Why would we give up the advantage?"

Sarge: Come on, Simmons, who could possibly remember an annoying conversation we had three whole days ago?

Simmons: Twelve minutes ago.

Sarge: Grif, what's your clock say?

Grif: Um, actually mine's a countdown to the next episode of Battlestar Galactica? Priorities dude.

Ghost: I hate you.

Caboose: Ah- ah- I just won again! Man, you guys are really bad at this game! It's- it's like you're not even playing at all!

Ghost: Ok, Caboose be quiet.

Cut to Wash and Church in a really cool, funky room

Washington: Here. This is it.

Church: Whoa. What is this place?

Washington: It's the storage facility for all the A.I.s. The rejects, the bad variants... everything is here. Everything.

Church: Dear lord, what're all these lights on the walls?

Washington: It's holographic storage.

Church: And one of these things is Alpha?

Washington: You work on closing that door. I'll find what we're looking for. And when I do, every soldier on base is sure to come running. So be ready.

Wash approaches one of the really cool walls

Voice: Washington. Washington. You suck.

Time passes

Washington: Churh I got it, get over here. Here, this is it. There.

Church: Oh, great you found it already?

Something weird that I can't describe happens

Church: Ah!

Washington: What's wrong?

Church: Nothing I just had like a weird flash- uh, ah!

Washington: Are you alright?

Church: Yeah, I think it's this thing. It's like, sending out images. Is this the Alpha?

Washington: No. This is not the Alpha.

Church: No? Thn what is it?

Washington: This, is Epsilon. ...This is my A.I.