𝑷𝑳𝑨𝒀 𝑫𝑨𝑻𝑬 - Steven Hyde

twenty four

24|COUSIN FUCKER

"This is definitely the last time I'm being this close to you three." Marigold rolled her eyes playfully as she stepped into the old shower with Hyde, Kelso and Fez. They were hiding to sneak attack Eric with a camera. Penny had informed them all of her evil plan to get back at Eric for all the horrible things he had done to her and even though Goldie was not the biggest fan of Penny, she loved this plan and had to witness it.

"I'm enjoying having your ass pressed against me." Hyde teased, pushing his crouch against her to further prove his point.

"Same." Fez grinned while looking down at her side breast which was resting against his chest.

"Let me guess, would you like to be included?" Goldie laughed, gesturing her body to Kelso.

"Yes please!" Kelso went to reach for her other breast when Hyde slapped his friends hand away and forced Fez to take a step back.

"She's my girlfriend." Hyde whined, wrapping his arms around the girl and pulling her closer to him.

"You're so adorable." She twisted her head and placed a small kiss on his cheek. Penny coughed from outside the shower, indicating the plan was starting so they had to go quiet. They heard Red and Kitty go into Hyde's room then Eric enter the basement. After hearing some awkward flirting from Eric they heard some footsteps entering the main space.

"Penny, there's no rat." Kitty stated as she walked back into the main room, Red trailing behind.

"Don't, Eric! Don't!" Penny said dramatically, her voice all high and very obviously fake.

"No, I was-" Eric tried to defend himself.

"Eric, step away from your cousin." Red warned his son.

"No, she's not my cousin. She was adopted." Hyde had to place his hand over Goldie's mouth to stop her from laughing.

"I'm not adopted." Penny said back with confusion.

"What? She's lying!" Eric stuttered, his eyes jumping between his parents and cousin.

"Eric, I saw her mother give birth to her!" Kitty said loudly, her tone telling them all she was annoyed at her son. "Now, what is going on?"

"I'm sleepwalking." He defended himself terribly, it coming out as more of a question.

"And I'm about to be sleepkicking your ass." Red threatened.

"Eric, what kind of person would lie about something as serious as being adopted?" Penny asked innocently. Marigold started to grow bored of this exchange, becoming impatient as she wanted to surprise attack her cousin.

"A liar who specialises in adoption lies. You." Eric rushed out, starting to sound desperate to keep some of his dignity. "a mean, vindictive person."

"Like someone who would trap someone in a revolving door?" She questioned back, letting him in on what her plan was.

"Yes. Oh." He shouted before realising what she said. "Mom, Dad, can Penny and I be alone for a minute?"

"No!" Red said quickly. "I'm not raising any flipper grandkids."

"No. Look, I just wanna apologise to Penny." Eric explained calmly.

"Fine. When you're done, you head right upstairs. I'm having Pastor Dave come over for an emergency house call." After Kitty's warning they all heard the two adults walk up the stairs meaning Penny and Eric were finally alone.

"I guess this will teach you to play pranks on innocent little girls." Penny said smugly.

"This has taught me a lesson." Eric began slowly. "And that is that I'm not going to rest until I get you back way worse than you got me! Which by the way, wasn't really that bad!"

"Actually, it's pretty bad." Kelso burst out the shower with the camera and started bombarding Eric with photos. While the boys chased Eric around the basement Marigold wandered over to the smirking Penny.

"Y'know what?" Goldie stated, throwing an arm over the blonde girl. "You're not that bad. I might forgive you a little for being a huge bitch."

"Thanks, that actually means something coming from you." Penny smiled back before the two girls went back to watching the horror scene before them.

~•~

"Cousin Penny went back home, huh?" Donna asked as they all sat around the back door. "Oh, wait, did I say cousin? Yeah, I meant cousin. Looks like that's two hot girls you can't have."

"Well, thank you for such a conservative estimate." Eric said sarcastically.

"By the way, Donna, here's your copy of the pictures." Fez passed the ginger girl a large pile of photos tied together.

"Yeah. If you flip through them real fast, it looks like Eric's running." Kelso commented with a grin.

"Give me those." Eric leaped up to snatch the pile from Donna but was too slow as she dropped them into Kelsos lap. They then proceeded to be thrown around the group, Eric pathetically chasing after them.

"You know what this has taught me." Goldie spoke up, leaning back against the wall beside Hyde's leg. "That I'm never walking from the bathroom to my room in only a towel ever again. I live in a house with a cousin fucker."