Red vs Blue (Male OC Insert) [Being heavily overhauled]

YOU ARE READING

Fanfiction

You were one of the first freelancers and one of the best you could never fill a mission no matter what happens you always succeed no matter who you fight you always come out on top. You've lost a lot of people you care about in your life along with...

#bloodgorge #carolina #church #ghost #grif #halo #lopez #meta #ophelia #projectfreelancer #redvsblue #rvb #sarge #scotland #simmons #texas #thegrimreaper #tucker #valkyrie

Season 5 Episode 78: You Can't Park Here

Start from the beginning

by Alpha423

Church: Rh-rank? What the fuck- I outrank, you don't outrank me I'm a Captain!

Doc: No, you're a Private with a dead Captain. The last time I checked, that makes you a Private. With a dead Captain.

Caboose: My body... is trying to die.

Church: W-okay fine, then we're both Privates, you don't outrank me.

Doc: No, I'm Medical Super-Private, First Class.

Church: That's not a real rank.

Doc: Yes it is.

Church: Since when?

Doc: Uh, since I sent them a letter every day for four years requesting that promotion.

Baby Alien: Harrgh!

Church: They promoted you for that!? You haven't even used your weapon!

Doc: Leadership isn't about firing bullets and stabbing people Church, leadership is about being able to tell others to fire bullets and stab people.

Caboose: If I've been bitten, does that mean I'm going to turn in to one of them?

Church: Shut up Caboose.

Caboose: Blaaaaaaaaaa-

Church: Shut up Caboose.

Caboose: -aaaaarg. Oh no, don't let me turn.

The sound of some ship falling heavily to the ground is heard. The ground promptly shakes, like a seizing toddler

Church: The hell was that!?

Caboose: I didn't feel anything.

Church: I'll be right back- don't feed any more of our soldiers to the Alien.

Church bravely runs off

Doc: Okay, but I can't make any promises.

Caboose: Don't leave me with the horrible doctor.

Doc: Oh shut up Caboose.

Caboose: Now he's cursing at me.

Cut to the large spaceship which has fallen almost directly on Donut both just now and at the end of episode 77 ...unlucky guy

Sarge: Simmons, status report. (coughs)

Simmons: Um, an enormous thing just fell out of the sky, and landed on Donut, Sir.

Sarge: Are there any other injuries?

Simmons: No Sir!

Sarge: You sure?

Simmons: I think so.

Sarge: Are you sure? No-one accidentally got shot in the face when someone else's shotgun just accidentally went off during the incredible distraction of a spaceship crash landing. Purely by coincidence?

Simmons: Uh, I don't kno-

Sarge: No-one orange?

Grif: Uhgh, I'm fine.

Simmons: Sorry Sir.

Sarge: Oh dehrh. I really need to adjust the sights on this thing.

Simmons: What about Private Donut, Sir? There's no way he survived that. Poor Donut. I'll miss him like a sister.

Sarge: I'll miss him like... well, like someone I knew but that I don't really wanna reflect on how deep our relationship went.

As Sarge is talking, a tapping sound is heard and continues