Sold Out (GxG) (Editing)

Chapter 8

I convinced her to sleep next to me, today. I didn't want to be left alone with my thoughts. She made me feel safe.

It seemed kind of awkward at first, laying next to each other, with a distance in between, looking at the ceiling in silence.

Would I be comfortable cuddling with her? Not like I really want to, but what if it happens?

I didn't want to make assumptions this time, I shifted my weight onto my left side and faced her. She turned to look at me and did the same.

I shifted closer to her, and she brought out her arm forward for me. That was the most intimate I had been with anyone in a positive way as far as I could remember.

It felt natural. I slipped my free arm around her waist underneath the blanket. There was no skin to skin contact as yet, but it felt really intimate to me.

"Goodnight, Alex", I murmured.

"Goodnight, Rose", she kissed my forehead.

I was almost in an embrace with her and as soon as I realised it, I got nervous and almost uncomfortable. That's it, I got my answer.

Just moments later, the embrace was completed, and she played with my hair with her other hand. I couldn't complain soon enough because I assume, I fell asleep.

-

'Rose.. Rose!', his breathing was heavy. 'Rose!'

"ROSE!", I woke up, panicking and breathing too heavily. "It's okay, it's okay. Everything's fine. Nothing happened, okay? Nothing happened. Here, drink some water."

Alex rubbed my back, frantically. My body was wet. I felt messy. I was sweating all over.

"It's okay. Everything's fine", Alex pulled me closer, into a hug, rubbing circles on my back. I calmed down a bit.

"I have a headache. A terrible headache", I squinted my eyes.

"Get up, get up, get up. Quick", she helped me get on my feet. She threw a piece of garment around my shoulders, I was too sick to understand what, and she hurried me down the stairs.

"We'll go for a walk, okay? You need fresh air", with that, she opened the door and the cool winter breeze hit my face. She hugged me close to her chest and told me to breathe slowly.

"Too cold? You wanna go inside? Or is this okay?", she sounded panicked.

"This is good", my breathing regained it's pace. She wiped my forehead, neck and face with the cloth. We stayed there for a while until my body felt cooler, and my heart rate was normal. I hugged her back and I could almost burst out, crying.

She kissed my forehead and asked me, "any better?" I nodded and hugged her tighter.

I didn't know what I wanted, I didn't know what I needed. I couldn't come to terms with what had happened. I never had such drastic effects after a nightmare. I even had nightmares when Sam slept next to me but never this bad.

We headed inside and Alex sat me on a chair. She kneeled in front of me and asked me if I was feeling better, if I wanted the fire or we could head to the room.

"I'm okay, it's just the headache now", I whispered silently. We went back to bed after she gave me a pill.

I still had no idea what to think of the whole thing. I thanked her and fell straight asleep.

-

My eyes opened to sunlight hitting my face. Last night was an absolute mess. I yawned, feeling way better.

"Morning, princess!"

"Good Lord!", I panicked and sat straight up. It was just Alex.

"Feeling better?", she smiled.

"A lot", I mumbled, rubbing my eyes.

"I made breakfast today", she cheered.

I turned to look. A classic french toast with tea.

"Cute", I giggled.

"A bit of French and a bit of Brit, hahah", she laughed.

"You..", I smiled, "right, you're from.. the UK..?"

I recalled the publisher's address I had seen on her book cover from the previous day.

"Yep, London, more precisely. And I just like French toasts", she reasoned, "you'll take a shower first?"

I nodded and rushed into the shower.

We had a serious conversation while eating, though. I couldn't swallow the food right.

"Do you.. have these dreams often?", Alex asked, giving quite a lot of thought to her choice of words.

"Um.. yeah. Quite often", I admitted.

"I mean.. I never asked you, but.. I don't know if it's too personal but when exactly did all this start?"

"About two weeks back. It happened every single day. Multiple.. times a day, actually..", I think I was too blunt with my answer. She seemed scared and taken aback.

"Don't take this in a wrong way but.. do you think maybe, we could try to get rid of the nightmares slowly?"

"Like, a medicine?"

"Oh, God, no. Ugh, wait a second", she put the plates aside after we were done and pulled me closer.

She looked straight into my eyes and I felt vulnerable all over again. She touched my cheek and I turned towards her palm.

"Maybe.. you can talk about it with someone.."

"Who?", I couldn't trust anyone, except her.

"Maybe..", her eyes shifted from me, to the ground and the surroundings, and came back to meet mine, "a friend?", she smiled.

"I don't have any", I sighed.

"Well, I am one", she grinned.

I smiled painfully. I almost felt bad for her. I decided to tell her at least something from my past.

"I woke up in a hospital and I recognised not a single face. I was shown pictures by this guy.. and I recognised my own self in there but not whom I was with", I smiled at the painful memory, as I reminisced.

Alex removed her hand and just gazed into my eyes intently.

"He had broad shoulders, green eyes and brown hair. He was a pretty guy. He convinced me that I was his girlfriend and I believed the pictures I saw.

He never told me who I was, where I was from. What job I had, what family I belonged to. I remembered nothing and I only knew my name. It was just him and I, in this really huge mansion he had rented.

He was nice to me at first and then he wasn't."

Alex looked like a baby being told about what God is. At first her eyes pierced through my soul, but now, she just let me invade hers.

"I've been put through scenes, I've been violated and harassed the way I never thought, was possible. I've been beat up, hurt, bruised and torn apart.

I tried to escape but he had excessive security. I tried calling people for help, but there was no avail. I tried to stop them, just to be hurt more.

Alex, when I came here, I expected another one of the same. To be undressed within seconds of meeting but.. but it never happened."

She was vulnerable to me. She was so very vulnerable, I could feel it.

"And here I am", hot tears ran down my cheeks, I could barely see anything.

I flung my arms around her and hugged her so tightly, I don't remember ever holding anything so. Her arms went around my waist and she held me tight.

I let it all out and cried into her neck. She shook in my arms and I knew she was crying too. I didn't imagine getting an outlet this way. I didn't imagine someone caring about me or listening to my story.

When I felt like nobody would even care to listen, Alexis Wilson cried for me.