His Appointed Wife

29. Incriminating photos and confessions

It was so wrong. She was-she had never been that selfish.

I am so sorry, Leo.

He looked at her with guilt, but there was something else there, too, something she had never expected to see in any man. Love. Maybe he wasn't in love with her, but he loved her.

How she wished she loved Leo, back. It would have been easy and simple. It wouldn't have been impossible and difficult like it was with Logan.

But you are in love with Logan.

But maybe I can learn to love--

Impossible. The answer was almost instant.

Leo loved her and here she was, going to hurt him for that. Just as she would forever be hurt for her love, Leo would be, for his.

"What are you doing?" She whispered. "This is totally inappropriate, Leo." She said, feeling like a hypocrite. But he needed to realize this wasn't going anywhere. She couldn't give him false hope.

"I am sorry." He said as he looked down. He looked really sorry, but she was sorry, too.

"God, Leo. Did you see that flash? Someone took a damn picture. It will be all over the news-God, you are a freaking celebrity, how can you, ugh! How the hell am I going to explain this to Logan?" She muttered, more to herself than to him.

How the hell would she? She could have if it was all Leo's fault, but it wasn't.

"I know, Alex, okay. I know, but he kissed someone else, too. I saw that. I saw your eyes and-- God, I want to protect you." He looked at her with exasperation and sadness. "And I want you to know how I feel for you."

"She kissed him, yes and it wouldn't be all over the freaking media. This is- oh my... I am married, for God's sake. You know that, Leo. You can't feel anything else for me, except friendship."

"I don't know shit. What the hell are you doing with him, Alex? He didn't love-- shit, he was Kissing that woman. He doesn't love you like you do and anyone can see that."

Anyone can see that!

It felt like a slap. His words. It might be true, but hearing it from someone she trusted as friend, in such unobscured clarity, it was like a blow to her heart and soul. She took a step back from Leo and he shook his head.

"No. Please. Sorry, that was such a wrong thing to say." He grabbed her hand and she shook it away. "Don't go. Don't go like this. I can't- I am sorry, I am sorry for being an idiot. But I love you, Alex. I love you and that is... "

"Don't say it. Don't." She didn't want to hear him say that. Because she was weak enough to hold on to that, even when she didn't want to.

"Why can't I? Over the months, you have become someone I truly, actually care about. And I- I don't want to let you go, Alex. You are wonderful, kind and -"

Leo looked determined. He looked like he would fight a war to win her. But he couldn't win no matter how hard he fought, because her heart wasn't hers, anymore. It belonged to a man who could care less about it.

And Logan was the only one she could love.

You don't know that. You really don't. She didn't know why the voice that always supported Logan was now talking her into trying to love someone else. It was just so-so confusing.