WAITING FOR THE BEGINNING

20. You Speak, Like an Angel

On his fourth check in - two and half months since coming back to the village - his handler Mao Ah shows up in person.

Hong Ge is in custody, making a deal to bring down the Black Dragon organization. But she has named him as her "handler." And only him.  

How did she know about this?  

No idea, Mao Ah said.  But she clearly said that she wanted the agent with the Peacock tattoo.

For the first time in Wei Xin's life, he finds himself not ready to face unknown dangers, terrible odds of survival. Instead, he calculates how long he needs to be gone and what he should do with his girl, his sort of a wife.

The simple fact that he calls her "his" shocks him. As soon as he realizes this, he also knows that Xian Ling is now a liability to him.

"Wei Xin." Yeh yeh asks for his pipe at the end of the family meal. "You haven't given me an answer. And it's been almost three months.  Almost harvest time again. Good time in the year to have a wedding."

The others around the table all nod and agree. They've come to see Xian Ling as part of the family.

Unlike their first meeting, Xian Ling looks down into her tea, without any panic. Her appearance seems serene, but her brows slightly knitted together - her heart conflicted. It's not that she doesn't care for Wei Xin. It feels that her heart already belongs to someone else. Or at least somewhere else.

Wei Xin studies her. Just as conflicted. Not sure why he seems almost happy to think about a wedding. Something about making this fake marriage official. Wrong word. Real. And not just official on paper.

He scoffs at the ridiculousness of his own thoughts. He's got three days before he has to resume his identity as a ruthless, womanizing gangster interested in only power and money. How is that fair to her. 

It is all wrong. She is not Zhang Xiang Ling. She is at best a victim of some crime committed by some unknown villain. At worst, she is being coerced into a marriage by semi-kidnappers. Albeit, she is not being imprisoned; she can leave at any time. And the villager is a safe haven. But the marriage part - she's never consented.

"That will not be necessary." Wei Xin cuts them off. "I will be leaving tomorrow."

He stuns the room into silence and observes interestingly, Xian Ling doesn't even look up. It is as if she is waiting for him to finish his thought.

"And what are you going to do with Xian Ling?" Yeh yeh asks reluctantly.

"I can't take her with me." Wei Xin looks at Xian Ling, who has quietly stood up and left the room. "But I will be back for her, when I finish what I must do."

"Um." Yeh yeh looks at Wei Xin interestingly. It is the first time he's ever announced that he will return.

"Thank you for looking after her for me." Wei Xin adds. Then wonders why he said that - it is not as if she were really his wife.

The men in the room all nod and then look at him knowingly.  

The conversations revive with discussions about the land, the harvest and gossips about the neighbors. He stands and leaves, looking as if he's going to look for her. He walks towards their building, more briskly as he approaches.

The room is cold and silent. He starts the fire and finds the meinbei scrunched at the far side of the kang.

"Xian Ling." He speaks gently to the figure under the meinbei. "I cannot marry. Not just you. But especially you. It would be wrong."

Silence answers him, but then stifled cries.

"First, I don't know who you are." He corrects himself. "You don't know who you are. And for yeh yeh to keep you here, is not exactly legal. Although you are free to go at any time."

She uncovers herself and nods at him.

He takes out his necklace and removes a set of rings. He reaches for her hand and puts the smaller ring on her fourth finger, right hand. 

She looks at him questioningly. She takes the other ring and puts it on his finger. But because she is mirroring his action, she ends up putting the ring on his wedding finger. He stops her. The last woman who put a ring on that finger has died in his arms.

"These are only for appearances, while I'm gone." He touches her face. "But I promise that I will come back to get you. When I finish with this project."

"Please. Help me." She speaks tentatively. "Help me find my family."

Wei Xin stares at her with wonder. Her voice is not that of a woman, more like a teenage girl. Yet, the resolve in her voice contradicts the youth tenor. "You speak." He wants to add, beautifully. Like an angel.

"Please take me with you." She speaks, more like a command and not a request.

Wei Xin shakes his head. "You are a liability."

"I will not be in your way." She gets up and looks through her drawing. "I will work and find a place to live."

"You don't understand." Wei Xin runs his hand thru his hair. "It's dangerous."

She sets down drawings of those faces not found in the village, of an apartment, a college, multiple hotels, a kamon, and a couple dozen wedding dresses, but only the train part. "I am remembering. Some parts. In pieces."

"Maybe we can start with this." She sets down the kamon drawing, "It looks unique."