Wizard Duel! (Both)

Start from the beginning
                                    

Joy: KICK HIS ASS, CLAY.

Clay: Okaaaay.

Nightflyer: RON. RON. Ron weASLEY.

Rainkeeper: Peril and Umbridge.

Peril: Permission to melt her?

Nightflyer: GRANTED. SOOOOOOOOOO GRANTED. MAKE HER SUFFER.

Peril: Yay!

Rainkeeper: Tsunami and Ginny

Tsunami: Awww, but I LIKE Ginny!

Joy: Then you die, and she lives!

Tsunami: NEVER.

Rainkeeper: Riptide and Neville.

Riptide:......I'm so dead.

Rainkeeper: Glory and Bellatrix.

Nightflyer: BELLATRIX! THAT BITCH! SHE KILLED SO MANY PEOPLE I LOVE- TORTURE HER WITH MAGICAL DEATH SPIT, GLORY, I BEG YOU!

Joy: Do it.

Glory: Okay. You don't have to ask me twice.

Rainkeeper: Deathbringer and Sirius.

Deathbringer: .......You want me to kill my idol....

Deathbringer: BUT HIS HAIR IS SO FABULOUS- I CAN'T HARM HIM!

Rainkeeper: Starflight and Cho Chang.

Nightflyer: CHO CHANG! DOMO ARIGATO, CHO CHANG!

Starflight: Okay?

Rainkeeper: Fatespeaker and Colin Creevey.

Nightflyer: *gasps*

Fatespeaker: Is....Is that bad?

Nightflyer: FATESPEAKER YOU HARM ONE HAIR ON COLIN'S PRECIOUS HEAD AN I'LL-

Air: *grabs Nightflyer*

Air: Shhhhh, Colin'll be okay....

Nightflyer: *growls*

Air: Everybody'll be fine unless you want them dismembered....

Nightflyer: *calms*

Rainkeeper: Sunny and Luna.

Sunny: LUNA! WOOHOO!

Rainkeeper: Winter and Draco.

Winter: I'm deling somebody named dragon?

Rainkeeper: Yes.

Rainkeeper:  Umber and Dean-

Air: DEAN!?!?!?!

Rainkeeper:.....Dean THOMAS.

Air: Oh.

Rainkeeper: Qibli and Blaise.

Qibli: Kay.

Rainkeeper: Moon and Hermione.

Moon: RIP me.

Rainkeeper: Kinkajou and Fred.

Kinkajou: Cool!

Rainkeeper: Turtle and Remus.

Turtle: Poor Remus....

Rainkeeper: And finally, Carnelian and Lavender Brown.

Seashell: *snaps talons*

*everyone appears in an arena*

Joy: NOW FIGHT!!!!

Nightflyer: I'll provide that music.

Nightflyer: GOTTA GET BACK TO HOGWARTS. GOTTA GET BACK TO SCHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL. GOTTA GET BACK TO HOGWARTS, WHERE EVERYBODY THINKS I'M COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL! 

Players: *dueling*

Air/Nightflyer: BACK TO WITCHES AND WIZARDS AND MAGICAL BEASTS! TO GOBLINS AND GHOSTS AND INCREDIBLE FEASTS!  ITS ALL THAT I LOVE AND IT'S ALL THAT I NEED AT HOGWARTS! HOGWARTS!

Rainkeeper: I'm sorry, what'd you say?

Nightflyer: HOGWARTS! HOGWARTS!

Joy: I can't hear you kids.

Air: HOGWARTS! HOGWARTS!

Nightflyer: MAN I'M GLAD I'M BACK!

Hosts: *glance towards arena*

*Ron, Lavender, Umbridge, Bellatrix, Fred, and Dean are dead*

*Riptide, Tsunami, Sunny, Moon, Fatespeaker, Starflight, and Turtle are dead*

Joy: Who's left?

Seashell: Qibli and Blaise, Deathbringer and Sirius, and Winter and Draco.

Air: Ooooooh, Sparkly dragon versus Sparkly dragon.....

*several hours later*

*Qibli and Sirius are dead*

Deathbringer: *very upset*

Draco: *kills Winter*

Joy: YAAASSSS!!!! GO MALFOY!!

Nightflyer: WE KNOW YOU'RE WEARING A DIAPER!

Draco: HOW DID YOU KNOW?!?!!

Nightflyer: A VERY POTTER MUSICAL TOLD ME AND THOUSANDS OF OTHERS!

Draco: YOU *raises wand*

Joy: Okay Nightflyer, the Harry Potter universe has delicate rules about magic and stuff, right?

Nightflyer: Yeah.

Joy: Well, I'm about to shatter everything you love.

Draco: AVADA KE-

Joy: *shoots Draco*

Nightflyer:.........

Joy: See, if they were REALLY smart, they'd bring muggle items into the magical world. Cell phones, oxygen tanks, guns, etc.

Nightflyer:.....*mind shatters*

Air:........Joy, you broke him.

Joy: I do that a lot. I'm like Rhysand, but I don't need mind control powers.

Air: YOU BROKE MY BOYFRIEND JOY HOW COULD YOU?!!?!?

Seashell: *snaps talons*

*everyone respawns-*

*Nightflyer is fixed*

Nightflyer: IT'S JUST A LITTLE MAKE-UP, DRACO WAKE UP!!!

Nightflyer: I COULD BE......

Draco: FALLING IN LOVE, FALLING IN LOVE, FALLING LOVE.... WITH HERMIONE GRANGER!

Hermione: WHAT?

Nightflyer: GRANGER DANGER EVERYBODY RUN!!!

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