Beatles WG Oneshots

Missing Artists

"Something weird is going on in the world of entertainment." The news anchor stated. "A lot of the most famous rap and hip-hop artists had just disappeared overnight!"

"That's right folks. People like Katy Perry, Justin Beiber, Lil Wayne and many others have all just gone off the map." The co-anchor continued. "The police unfortunately has no lead about who could be behind the kidnappings. But hopefully they can find something soon so these popular singers can come back soon."

But this broadcast went unnoticed by two people. Mainly because they happen to be dead at the moment. To be more specific, two Beatles rocking out in heaven.

"John? Can you help me loosen the straps?" George asked his bandmate as he was struggling to try and get his guitar in front of his enormous belly.

The rhythm guitarist simply rolled his eyes as he fixed his younger bandmate's guitar strap until it fit perfectly against his body.

"Y'know is it just me, or have you been putting on more weight recently?"

"Uhh..... What makes you say that?"

"We'll ever since we've started going back down to earth, you've been getting rather.. Um.. Thicker?."

It was true, one time John and George were allowed to go back down to earth for a while so they could see what was going on, the latter came back with a basketball-sized belly which kept getting bigger with every visit back to earth.

"Well.... I guess I ought to pace myself from now on, maybe exercise a bit more too. And speaking or earth, can we go back down there at say... 3:50?"

"Alright, but why at that set time?"

"Let's just say that I want to see some guys."

"Ummm..... I'll just take your word for it." John muttered. "Now let's just jam."

Later on, the two were getting ready to head on down to earth, but then John noticed something on George's bed.

"Brochure for a One Direction concert? I thought George hated that band.... Probably just something else to make a dartboard out of." John thought.

He knew all too well about George famous hatred for modern pop and rap music. He even told John that he may never forgive Paul for collaborating with Kanye west for a song. It took him a whole week for him to finally get over it.

Then the two had found themselves at the London airport. "Well I'm off to see someone, I'll catch up to you soon John." George called as he went off to who knows where.

John didn't think too much about nowhere he was going, but then he saw the same broadcast shown earlier. "Pop stars disappearing? George would have loved this."

"Hey man, heard about the missing artists?"

John turned around to see a rather punk looking girl who was also watching the news.

"Well... I wouldn't call them artists but no, I've just heard about this. When did this start?"

"Ever since Justin Beiber had just vanished from after a concert last week, a bunch of other pop stars had also started to just be gone as well."

"Last week?" John thought. "That was also when George started to gain weight. Does that brochure also mean..."

After realizing what could be going on with the missing singers, John quickly went off to look for George.

"HEY!!!! Where are you going?!!" The punk girl shouted.

"Just to find the missing horrible singers!" John replied.

Eventually John made it to the stadium where the brochure advertised 1D to be playing at. And backstage, he found George forcing each member into his mouth, eating them.

"GEORGE!!!! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING??!!!!"

Looking behind, George was shocked to see his bandmate running up to him.

"WHA??!!!! How did you realize I was eating horrible singers?!"

"What? Did you not think that any popular artist vanishing wouldn't go unnoticed?"

Placing his ear over George's now wrecking ball-sized belly, John heard the screams of several people inside.

"Alright George. You've had your fun, now spit them out!"

"But John!!!"

"I know they can't sing or play instruments to save their lives but they're still humans and deserve to live. Now spit them out!"

"But... Oh fine."

Hunching over, George proceeded to vomit out the 1D members. They were absolutely terrified but fortunately unharmed.

"Is that really it?" John sneered.

Muttering something inaudible to his bandmate, George forced himself over again, then vomited out the rest of the missing pop singers.

Once finally out of George's belly, the pop stars fled him immediately, shouting about the things they've seen.

"What gave you the idea to eat those guys anyways?"

"I knew that a lot of those artists got in trouble with the law before, but they won't stay in jail for long. Then it seemed like they won't stay anywhere for long, so I thought of the only place where no one could find them."

"..... And you say I have crazy ideas."