You Can't Break Her

Chapter seventeen: part seven | June

June 2007
Bayhollow, Ontario

Krystal called early in the afternoon to tell me that her friends were have a party. I was excited, it would be the first age appropriate activity I had participated in in a long time. I would be able to meet people my age and hang out like things were always that normal.

She came over a few hours early and we picked outfits that were showy but not in a slutty way. I was still rocking the post pregnancy body so cleavage was my only show. She wore a fitted dress because she had no problem showing off. I didn't resent her for her ability to wear nice clothes, but I did wish I could do the same with some sort of confidence.

"I've known these kids since I was in elementary school. They are all really nice and I think you'll get along well." She ran the straightener over a chunk of my hair. "We're just going to have a few drinks, maybe play some video games. It won't be a big deal."

I knew she was speaking to me but her words were meant mostly to calm Patrick's nerves.

He picked a fuzz off the bed spread and flicked it. "I still don't understand why you have to go to this party."

"I don't have to. I want to. I've never been to a party that wasn't at my house or in the woods." I sprayed hairspray over my straightened hair and brushed it through so it would stay put, but not as a wall of hair.

Krystal put the straightener back in her bag after it had cooled for a few minutes. "Don't worry. I will be with her." She stepped closer to him. "I won't let anything happen to her. You should know that already."

"I know. I know. You'll protect her." He mocked. "Have you been around her when she drinks?" An evil grin pulled up the corners of his mouth.

Krystal rolled her eyes and crossed her arms across her chest. "No but, she will be fine. I'll make sure she doesn't drink to much. Stop acting like her father." She snapped and exited the room to cool off.

He looked at me and I looked to the floor boards. He moved closer and brushed my hair to one side and kissed my neck. "You'll be careful, right?"

I nodded.

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The forty-five minute drive to the house was uncomfortable, to say the least. I stared out the window of the truck and watched the telephone poles pass. When we got out of the more populated areas, I gazed out into the vast infinity of the night sky. The sparkling stars were sprinkled down on the blanket of navy blue, with a line of pink along the tree tops on the horizon.

I slid out of the truck. "We will call you later." I leaned over the seat and grabbed my purse.

Patrick grabbed my hand and kissed the back. "Please, be careful."

"I will." I closed the truck door and ran to the front of the house.

The gathering was already in full swing when we arrived. It was a small crowd, only 10-15 teenagers. They were all close friends and I couldn't relate to their adjusted mindsets. I grabbed a bottle of crown royal and poured a toxic mix with Pepsi. I chugged it back and poured another.

We watched the guys play Halo and they looked up 90's pop songs on the computer for the sake of nostalgia. The alcohol flipped my insides and the room started to spin. I stumbled but no one noticed. I steadied myself on the wall and continued to interact as much as possible.

"Where's—." I hiccuped. "The bathroom."

Krystal's eyes widened when she made eye contact with me. I'm guessing the half bottle of crown in my system was apparent on my face. She ushered me to the stairs.

"I can't do that. Try something else." I slurred.

"The bathroom is upstairs."

"Damn!" I tried to smile. "Alright, let's go!" I threw myself at the stairs and she grabbed hold to steady me.

The bathroom was a messy and unnecessary situation that needs no further explanation.

I was laying on the floor in the bathroom after the disaster I created. "I have to call her boyfriend." I heard Krystal say to someone.

She brought me to the driveway I laid flat. The pavement was cool on my heated skin. The night sky had deepened tp a blue-black colour. The stars and trees zipped in circles, like a race to see what would make me sick faster.

The rest of the night is a blank. I wanted to be apart of a regular life so badly that I drank to fit in and when that wasn't enough, I stepped it up.