here's something I've not discussed but totally should! Because of course genderfluidity is not just being a handsome boy and pretty princess and that's it. There is issues.
K so im gonna start with one i rn dont have too much of an issue with but i know a lot of people do.
BATHROOMS! Soooo changing gender can mean u want to use a different bathroom at different times and of course that is so confusing for other people. I just use the mens bathroom. i look like a guy all the time so i'd get questioned way too much if i used the womens one. Not even like confusion it would be 'the wrong bathroom' no arguement but some people are better than me and do whats right anyway.
I know for some if they go in a mens bathroom they r told they r in the wrong place and if they go in the girls they are told the same! and that's rlly difficult and horrible for self acceptance and confidence.
It's not really something i can fix for you? or make magically go away bc i can't fix society but i have a few tips I've picked up from people and youtube videos etc.
most if these r based on if its at school or college etv
●Go when classes are on. So go when there is no one else or few people using the bathroom in order to avoid problems
●Take your friends with you. now if you're out to friends and they understand you they can help make u feel more comfortable.
●Now this is a hard one. but try to find a gender neutral bathroom. its obvious as hell but if ur in public there may be one somewhere. and if u can I'd recommend finding it.
●Go before going out. its stupid and obvious but before you go out just nip the loo first so it avoids chance of needing it when out.
One thing i am not gonna reccommend you do is not drink. you MUST drink plenty. do not make yourself dehydrated just for not wanting to use a certain loo. you health takes priory over everything!
idk how well i covered that but hey ho, i tried!
PRONOUNS! it can be a real effort for people to get ur pronouns right. especially if they change. I have a few things to help that.
●Bracelets. You can have different colour bracelets that you wear each day to show what ever your gender is and what pronouns you want.
e.g. orange for boy, green neutral, and yellow for girl. (i didn't want to use gender stereotypical coulours but u can if u want) Let your friends know what is what and they can then know what to use.
●Pin badges. I know you can get pin badges that have the pronouns written on them so like if u wear whichever is right people can read it and hopefully will use that set of pronouns.
●Simply telling people. Just telling people at the start of the day or whenever your gender changes that you want a change in pronouns. it works for friends and family etc but for anyone who doesnt know u i guess it could be an issue as they'd presume pronouns :-/
eek i hope i covered that okay.
SUDDEN CHANGE IN GENDERR.
THIS. is a damn nuisance. It's so annoying. Like i don't dress directly based on gender bc i cant bc of being closeted and shit but also. fuck.
If i went out wearing my hella masc coat and adidas superstar shoes etc then suddenly felt like a girl i would probably cry tbh. Bc I'd much rather be wearing tights, shorts, suspenders and my hat than gross masc clothes.
Or ya know band t shirt, flannel and hoodie is cute for neither days hehe.
but anyway its annoying. i did talk about this last chapter tho so like im gonna leave it here and say taking sn extra set of clothes out with you or taking your binder if u have one etc is a good idea.
IDENTIFYING AS ONE GENDER FOR A LONG TIME
OOF THIS GETS ME SO BAD.
If I've identified as a boy (my birth gender) for a long time i totally start questioning "am i making this up? is it a lie to make myself feel special?" and thats normal and thats okay but its annoying as hell.
Then if i identify as the opposie (a girl) for a longgg time. which happens way too much. i start to go "oh what if im actually demigirl? or trans? and wont admit it to myself? or im trans but a lil' confused still?" like eek! those thoughts stress me tf out.
I know a lot of ppl say they are genderfluid then figure out they are mtf or ftm etc and thats perfectly okay, acceptable and valid.
But damn do i get confused sometimes. its stressful asf.
also i just think its a hard task to ever definitley know who i am bc who i am constantly changes? if that makes sense?
i don't really have any tips for these? bc frick they wont go away but just tell yourself you are valid and know you're not just attention seeking, i know who you are and that's perfectly okay.
K so I've been getting most of these from this post i found. and im gonna talk about the one mentioning surgery. I know quite a few genderfluid but who actually do want some form of surgery. like going on T or having top surgery etc. and there is nothing wrong with that. do what makes you happy. it wouldn't make u any less genderfluid, just more comfortable in your body and thats what matters.
but for some people thats not quite an option because we might have a strong feeling like a girl one day and think about going on E or something but the next day damn ur a guy again and eek u dont want to do that. so forget the option bc it aint a thing. not every genderfluid will experince this i dont think because they dont even see it as a thought to do anything like that bc whats the point, ur only gonna change your mind?! but some of us like to torment ourselves and think about the maybes and what ifs too much lmao
anyway yh this was loooonnggg. BUT i hope said the right things and wasn't too confusing haha.
now genderfluid billie bean is gonna go! comment anything else u think is an issue or if i said anything wrong. whoops.
YOU ARE READING
THIS BOOK IS TRANS*Non-Fiction
a book about my life as a transgirl and how i started identifying as genderfluid then found my way to being trans. Also general information and tips! Highest ranking- #1 on #gender #11 on #mtf