Finding Us Again

Second First Date (part 2)

"I just needed you to know how much you mean to me Nina. I needed to you to know how serious I was about this and us. And making this second chance count and work. That fear I hear in your voice that I just heard breaks my heart. It kills me that you feel like that. And I hate myself for causing you pain in any way. I don't ever want you to feel that way. I don't ever want you to have to second guess this and us. And me." I told her honestly.

"Ian that's just fear baby. And even if I have that fear it doesn't change how I feel about you. It doesn't change the love I have for you. Nothing could ever change that. I'm just scared." She said looking a little sad.

"And I don't want that. I don't want you to be scared Nina. Like last night when you said 'I'm going to cherish the time I have with you'
It made me sad that you feel like that. It made me sad that you feel like I'm just here for now and that I'm going to change my mind about this and us. Because I'm not Nina. I swear to God I'm not gonna change my mind." I had tears welling up in my eyes.

"I love you Nina. So much. Nothing is ever going to change my mind. I'm not going to leave you. I'm not going to walk away. I'm not going to ever stop loving you Nina. I never have and I never will. Nothing will ever change that Nina. Ever. I swear." I told her. I needed her to understand how serious I was about this.

"I love you too Ian. And I always will. You're all I've ever wanted. And I promise that these feelings will go away. The fear will go away. I promise it will baby. It's already starting to go away. I was just nervous. But it's going away already baby."

"I'm so sorry Nina. I'm sorry that I ever caused you any pain. I'm sorry for putting you through this. I've hated myself every single day for it. I should have fought for you. And for us. And our life together. We were perfect. We are perfect for each other. And I promise we're going to get that back baby. No matter what I have to do. We're going to get back to that. And have it even better." I promised her. And I meant every word of it.

"I know we will baby. And I was serious about what I said last night. About us moving here. We could. I'm ready for a change. And we both need a change baby. Plus our home is perfect." She said looking around.
I was totally surprised. I didn't think she would remember it. She had only seen it twice before the break up.

"You remembered the house?" I asked.

"Of course I remember our house Ian. I thought it was perfect when you bought it for us. And I still think it's absolutely perfect for us. So what'd you say, are we moving here and into our dream house?" She asked with a smile on her face.
I could see the hope in her eyes.

"If you're serious about moving here and this is really what you want to do. But please don't make this big decision because of what we're going through. I don't want you to feel pressured into this."

"Ian this is what I want. I want you and me in this beautiful home that you bought for us. Building the life that we have wanted. I want us in this home. In our home. Together. That's exactly what I want Ian." She said.

"That's what I want to baby. That's what I've always wanted." I told her.

"Me too. And now we can have that. We can enjoy this beautiful house. And relax. And enjoy being with each other. I've always loved it here. You know that. Plus this house is amazing. We loved it the moment we saw it. It's more than big enough. And there's plenty of room for when family comes."