Darker Shades » afi | ✓

Chapter 19

Ashton's eyes bared into my own, the unexplainable essence of it all rippled through my body. It was a profound yet exciting feeling having your teacher drool over you as if you were some unattainable object that they had been blessed with. His huge hands cup my cheeks, the warmth of his palms radiated into my cheeks, the way he caressed me caused my heart to flutter uncontrollably. I loved him. He loved me. But loving someone like Ashton Irwin wasn't so simple.

The difficulties that we faced in our 'relationship' didn't just include the obvious fact that he was my teacher. No. You see after that amazing night at the hotel Ashton decided he wanted to bare all. Not in the physical sense but mentally. His hands drop to my shoulders forcing me to take a seat on the end of his bed, the warmth he provided dissipated and for a moment I felt vulnerable...just a single moment. He had a secret. That was his reasoning for shortening our retreat. Obviously, my mind raced with a million different possibilities, unsure of how this conversation would go. "Ally" he begins, already I could tell from the tone of his voice that he was nervous. The way his chest rose and fell, quickened breathing, sweaty palms, racing hearts.

"Ashton, please spit it out. I'm sure whatever it is it won't cloud my opinion of you I promise" I plead with him, cupping my hands around his as we searched each other's eyes in hopes of an answer to an unasked question. The way his eyes widened frightened me, as though he was ultimately terrified of what he was about to confess to me.

"Ally, I wanted to be honest with you. I thought this would be easier after I told you my feelings...but I was wrong. I want to show you something" his voice remained calm, but I could tell he had something sinister playing on his thoughts.

"Can't you just tell me?" I press as the corners of my mouth tug downward to form a frown.

"I think if I show you it will be a lot easier for you to take in" he sighs deeply, dragging his eyes to the floor as he stands up. "Allison please!" practically begging this time, urgency in his voice as he outstretched his hand for me to take.

"You're scaring me"

"Please don't be afraid Allison. I've never told anybody about this and it's kind of a big deal for me"

He leads me through the hall to a door, a door which I had always assumed was for storage. Boy, I was wrong. The strange and overwhelming feeling that washed over me as he opened the wooden object, revealing a whole host of foreign objects I didn't even know existed. Rope perfectly wrapped in neat little bundles on a shelf, handcuffs hanging proudly on little hooks. To say I was shocked would be an understatement, I knew exactly what this meant and I wasn't entirely sure how to process this information. Of course, this wasn't going to be any old ordinary love story where two harmless strangers get the fairy tale. "I like things differently" he coughs slightly to clear his throat, It wasn't like the movies where he stated it with a dash of mystery. He said it with disgust as if he were ashamed of himself for liking things a certain way. I for one wasn't going to pass judgment on him, I mean why should I? Ashton is...well everything to me at this current moment in time, I can't just throw everything away because he's a little more adventurous. "Please say something" his eyes are looking everywhere else but at me, and I could tell he was processing everything in his head, clearly worried about my answer.

"Why don't you show me what everything does?" my tone inquisitive. His head snapping up to look at me shock washed upon his features.

****

The darkness had consumed every single cell in my body, anticipation devoured my mind. Every sense heightened, every figment of my being craved this and only this. My fingers grasping around the red rope delicately wrapped around my wrists, I could feel every tuft of the woven material. The image of black painted above me as the blindfold he'd slipped over my eyes made everything invisible. Waiting for him to touch me, please me, punish me.