The Rose that Grew from Concrete

-New Beginning-

-Tionne-

Ughh this little girl is yet again crying in her sleep. It's been 6 months of this every other night she cries or she is screaming, you'd think I'd be use to it by now. But no one can ever get use to someone screaming in the middle of the night. Noelle! Noelle I said shaking her. No don't touch me she said backing up from me. She had tears running down her face and she looked at me like she'd never seen me before. Noelle I said getting closer to her its me Tionne calm down. She just kept looking at me. Mama she said looking at me. Naw girl I am not your mama! She just stared at me like she still didn't know who I was and she was confused as to why I was yelling at her.

Is she okay Kayo said coming into the room? She's fine go on back to bed I said shooing him out of the room. Mama picked up some extra shifts a few times a week to make sure we had enough money so I was responsible for the kids at night. She wasn't like this every night it was only some nights that she would completely freak out like it was routine thing. The first few times I was like "Mama something is wrong with her" but once she told me what really happened to her and how she was shuffled through the foster care system I realized this was more serious than we thought.

I turned my attention back to Noelle and she was shaking and breathing deeply. Come here baby girl I said grabbing her from the top of the bed. No she said pulling away. Come here I said grabbing her wrists and pulling her towards me. I've learned in the past few months if I want her to do something I have to be strict with her meaning I don't take no for answer. She knows I am not playing with her so she eventually gives in and does what I want her to do. Calm down and breathe Noelle! What dream did you have this time I said putting her in my lap? She looked down for a minute before speaking. Andre was touching me again and this time he...he what I said rubbing her back. She couldn't get the words out without crying and breathing heavy to the point where she would give herself asthma attacks. Shh shh I said rubbing her back.

Whisper it in my ear what he did to you. She finally calmed herself down enough to whisper it in my ear. Oh god I thought to myself after what she told me. Don't worry Noelle he's not going to hurt you ever again okay I am here to protect you. But what if he's still mad at me, because he thinks I told and comes after me when he gets out? He's never going to find you, you're safe here. You want some warm milk? She looked at me with this confused face as she wiped the remaining tears off her face. Eww warm milk that's nasty Titi can I have some cold milk. Yeah you can I said laughing a little bit. We went into the kitchen and got her something to drink before sitting on the couch. This seemed more like our nightly routine, we'd come into the living and I'd sing to her while rubbing her back and then she'd fall asleep in my lap. Crazy a few months ago I'd never thought I'd be this close to this little girl. But she got to my heart and now I feel like it's my duty to look out for her.

Tionne! Tionne! Wake up! Huh I said opening my eyes to see mama standing over me. What time is it? 6:30, she have another bad dream? Yeah it's like a routine every other night she wakes up screaming and crying. She sighed before sitting on the other couch. I know I think I found a doctor she can go to that will help her with these nightmares. She really does need to see someone tonight's dream was really graphic. Graphic! Yeah he did something different than all of the other times. And she remembers it? Every detail of it mama it's like she is reliving it every day, how long was he doing this to her? From what I can gather it wasn't too long like maybe a month or so but I think something was going on with her prior to them being put into the foster home. How do you know? I talked to her peditrian last month and she says that she thinks that the sexual assault started earlier. Mama she's 8 how much sooner could this have started? Possibly around 6. Ugh what on earth would make someone want to touch their little sister like that? A person who is sick in the mind.