Something Infinite

Chapter 17

Harry's POV

Nothing felt better than knowing the person you loved, was finally getting back to their normal selves, and they were managing fine without you there.

Jen was always a strong girl, but I worried about leaving her considering how she had been the past week. It triggered a sense of guilt for leaving, and panic when she had told me Nate diagnosed her with a form of depression, but she assured me she was managing it.

All I could do was believe her, and have hope my absence wasn't a definitive factor in slowing down the healing process. It made me nervous to know she was seeking counselling, especially when I couldn't be there with her.

It was hard for me to accept that I wasn't meant to know every thought that occurred within her, and made me really suspicious as to what exactly she would be sharing that I may not be aware of myself. I was an over thinker, if Jen felt it was important for me to know something, she was very vocal about it.

Besides all that, it was good to hear her laugh again, and slip back into the playful banter we shared throughout our relationship. Sex and intimacy weren't the most important part of us, but talking about it and joking around was something we did, and I was relieved to be getting back to our old selves again.

Thinking about being intimate with her was a daily thought, but I wasn't going to pressure her into rushing anything the next time I saw her, or spoke to her, I was more than willing to wait for when she was ready. This time last year I couldn't even hear her voice, because she wasn't mine anymore, so I was just content with talking about life and knowing she would be waiting for me.

"Haz, you ready?" Niall stuck his head into my room, luring me to this meeting about the upcoming schedule.

"Yeah..." I answered half attentive to him. I was looking down at my phone, smiling at the photo I had taken of Jen and Mia in the hospital the day she was born. I just had to remember that everyday I was here and away from them, I was providing them with a life they deserved.

"What's got you all cheery? Last time I saw you, you were pissed off," Niall nudged me when I finally joined him in the hall, on the way to the meeting room.

"I spoke to Jen, she sounds like she's bettering herself, she was happy. I've missed her laugh, Niall, I feel like I finally have my Jen back. I'm just disappointed I'm not there to see it in person, but I know this is where I have to be," I finally admitted out loud.

I couldn't have this sour attitude and resentment for being here, the entire time. The fans did a lot for me in terms of the life I had, so I had to be on my game for them, they deserved it. This wasn't forever, it was four weeks, I would manage.

"Mate, you have me here, you know you can talk to me whenever you need to. I know you're missing both the girls, but I think this is Jen's chance she can prove to herself she can do this even without you. You know what I mean? She can squash her doubts."

"You have a point," I admitted to him.

"Of course I do, they don't call me the smartest member of One Direction for nothing," he laughed at his own joke, triggering me to laugh along with his self title.

"Who calls you that? People have called you many things, but smartest isn't one of them."

"Kiss my arse, Haz," he pushed me to the side, and we play wrestled as we entered the meeting room. My friendship with Niall was so easy, and so playful. He was like the brother I never had- we fought often over the most ridiculous of things, but we always had each other's back. He was my rock in this band, and most definitely my best friend.