More than a family- The story of Dawsey

As long as I'm here ( Chapter 100)

I expected all of this. All the signs were there. I had a feeling and maybe that was just my motherly instincts. I just had a feeling. I was brought to the hospital, and was unconscious. Matt was there with me the whole time. Matt confronted the doctor " You said everything was going to be okay! We believed you!" She looked at him and tried to calm him down  " Mr. Casey... we couldn't stop any of this.. This is something different. These things just happen.. I'm sorry!" 

I woke up a couple hours later to Matt sitting there. He was just sitting there holding my hand staring at me. I opened my eyes, and then met Matt's eyes  " What happened..?" Matt looked at me with his teary eyes  " We lost the baby.." I looked at him and started to cry  " No!!!! We couldn't.. have.." He looked at me " Baby... we did... It's okay!" I just couldn't believe this. I have never felt pain this bad. I felt so empty, and I didn't know what to do. I thought about the kids, and I didn't know what to do. 

1 week later...

For the first week we refused to see anyone.Matt and  I decided to take some time off of work. We didn't know when we are going back. We heard a knock at the door. Matt got up and headed towards the door " Antonio.." He stood at the door, waiting to be let in " Matt... how are you doing?" I looked at him " okay.." He walked into the house " Hows Gabby?" Matt looked at him " We're getting there.." He walked into the living room " hey Gabby!" I hugged him " Antonio.." He sat down next to me, " how are you doing..?" I looked at him " Okay.. it's hard!" He looked at me and then at Matt  " I know! It's going to be hard for a while.. have you guys thought about seeing someone.." I looked at him " No..." Antonio looked at me " I mean... not someone on the job... like a therapist, privately" Matt looked ay me " Well... maybe that wouldn't be a bad idea... baby!" I looked at him " I just don't know.. what I can handle.." 

At house 51..

We didn't really clue in everyone. We didn't keep up with everyone. When we took time off, we had to keep or distance. Everyone knows about the miscarriage, but not about everything leading to it. We wanted to keep everything personal, even if everyone is like family. Hermann knocked no the door to the Chief's office. Chief yelled " come in.." Hermann looked at the Chief  " When's Casey coming back.." Boden shook his head " I don't know.." Hermann looked at him " hasn't he run out of time.." Boden looked at him " Hermann.. They lost their baby. Casey is going to take as much time off. You of all people should understand that..." He looked at him " Right Chief.. Sorry.. It's just.. they really haven't told us much.. They haven't even returned calls, or answered the door. Severide walked in and overheard " Hermann... give it time!" Hermann and Severide both walked out of the Chief's office. Hermann stood there and looked at Severide " How are we supposed to wait things out.." Severide looked at him " We have to... for the sake of Gabby and Matt.." Hermann looked at him " have you seen them..?" He looked up at Hermann " Once... Casey.. needed something from his office.." Hermann looked at him " You went to see them and you didn't say anything.." Severide looked at Hermann and couldn't believe this, " Hermann.... we can't understand this.. Not even me.. Things weren't the same there.." Hermann looked at Severide " I know that.." Severide just stood there               " Antonio hasn't even seen Gabby much... I'm not going to stop you from visiting them, but just know that nothing is the same..."

3 weeks later... 

Everyone goes through the 5 stages of grief. Some of those stages seem like they last forever, and others just go by quick. Some of those stages can mix. I couldn't pull myself out. I felt to angry. I feel like everything is my fault. I wasn't the happiest about being pregnant again. It really didn't seem like the right timing. I should of been happier, and not doubting everything. I feel like I can't even get out of bed. Matt walked into the bedroom, as I was lying there gripping the ultrasound picture. He looked at me  " hey.. you okay?" I looked up at him " I did this..." Matt sat at the edge of the bed " no you didn't.." I looked at him as my eyes started to fill up with tears, " Matt... I wasn't happy about being pregnant again.." He looked at me " you were just shocked.. you have every reason to be..." 

The door bell rang, and I jumped a little bit. Matt opened the door, and there was Hermann                        " Hermann.."  He looked at Matt just hoping to come in " hey can I come in.." Matt looked at him " I'm sorry... it's not a good time.." Hermann looked at me " I get that... you can't hide forever.. you will have to come back to work sometime.." I looked at him " We know that.. were just working on things.." 

Hermann came inside and really changed things for us. He went up to the bedroom to see Gabby. I warned her " Gabby... Hermann's here.." She looked at me " you didn't let him in.." Hermann walked into the room " Hi Gabby!" I nodded " hi.." He looked at me " how are you?" I looked at Matt " Now you know... this is how things are." He looked at me " I don't know what your going through.. I do know that hiding isn't the answer.." Matt looked at him " We get we kind of left with no explanation..." I held Matt's hand " nothing was easy for us. We made this decision because we love all of you guys..." He looked at us " I know that..." 

Hermann left and we were left with what we need to do next. We needed help and more time feel. I didn't feel that I could work anytime soon. We did need more time with our friends and family. We needed that time.

Thanks for reading everyone! 

Sadly, yes this is an end of an era. This the end of "More Than a Family"  I have honestly become super attached to this story over the last 100 chapters. I feel that I've really learned from this story. My writing has grown. I'm not leaving this story or obviously any of the characters behind. There is going to be a next step up story. The next story for this "saga" ( if you want to call it that) is going to be release sometime next month.. ( I will let you know when I know when) If you want to know more follow me on twitter & Instagram which are both @crazyforsvupd 

Thanks again for reading and I hope you will all continue to follow this story in its new journey! :)