Dumped!

Dumped (34)

I slowly broke my lips off his, as I felt a longing to look into his eyes. My breathing was quickened and my heart was ramming hard against my rib cage. He lifted me slightly, rolling onto his side, me beneath him.

He was gazing into my eyes intently, making me long for him even more.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” I asked softly, trailing my finger across his jaw.

“Like what?”

I bit my lower lip, a smile playing on my lips, “Like you’re in love with me or something”, I joked.

“What if I am?” he asked, cocking an eyebrow.

I sat up slowly, and he followed suit. “Then”, I began, wrapping my arms around his neck, as he pulled me onto his legs, my legs around his waist, “I. Love. You. Too.”

 He grinned and said, “I never want to go back home.”

“Me neither”, I whispered, untangling my hands, and running them under his shirt, against his rock hard abs.

He pulled off his shirt, causing me to catch my breath. “You know”, he started, “We might as well have left our clothes at home.”

I giggled, “Where’s the fun in that?” I asked, and pulled off my own shirt, lacking any underwear beneath.

He sucked in his breath and said, “Double extraordinary.”

I smiled at him, dreamily, feeling my insides convulse in anticipation, as he laid me on my back.  He angled towards me, taking his time to explore every last inch of my body, before fulfilling my yearning for him, and taking me to the one place, only he could.

I lay back against the pillows, breathing heavily. I felt Jeremy roll onto his side, his hand flung across my stomach. I followed suit, pushing myself closer to him.

“Jeremy, I . . . I want to talk”, I said, looking up at him.

“About?”

I sat up on my heels, “Feelings”, I mumbled.

He snorted and sat up, “Deana, you don’t have to.”

“No no. I want to. I . . . I need to.”

“Okay? Well, shoot”, he said, leaning back against the headboard.

“Well, first . . . what . . . what am I?” I mumbled.

He looked at me in confusion, “Um . . . hot?”

I laughed, shaking my head in disbelief, “I mean, to you.”

“Ohhh. Well, you’re still hot . . . but, I guess . . . you’re my girlfriend”, he said, with a shrug, pulling me closer till I was on top of him.

I smiled, looking down at him. “Okay, but I . . . I don’t want things to change”, I said, treading carefully.

“Why would they? Because we said ‘I love you’ to each other?”

“Well, yeah. I mean, I . . . it’s not that I don’t want to move forward, I just . . . I just want things to stay . . . the way they are . . . . I’m not making any sense, am I?” I ran my hands through my hair.

“Not really, but I’ve somehow learned to decipher the cryptic things you say”, he said slowly, “You don’t want me to like . . . ask you to marry me or something crazy like that.”

It was like he read my mind. Sometimes, change is good, but with our wedding histories, I didn’t even want to think about all the many things that could go wrong with taking a step like that. And I was still kind of scared. Of the commitment. Of the future. It would be too fast, and too soon.