Only You - [Lip Gallagher]

we live on a landslide.

"Jesus, Carl." I chuckle as I see him struggling with his tie that's now in a knot. "Can you help?" He asks and I nod, untying the knot, "What's this for?" I ask. "West Point interview." He says and a huge smile grows on my face, "I'm so proud of you." I say, patting his chest indicating the tie is done. "Don't be too proud yet, I'm not in." He says, walking downstairs, "Well, you've come a long way from insane killing animals Carl, to white boy Carl, to grown up put together Carl." I say as I follow him downstairs. "Hey." Lip says, walking through the front door, "Why are you home?" Carl asks, "Power outage at work." He says, not taking his eyes off me. "You okay?" Carl asks, "Yeah. Fine." Lip says, finally breaking his gaze. "And Xan?" He adds, "Yeah. You look good, what for?" "West Point. You sure you're good? I can leave and you guys will be fine?" Carl asks, worried. Last night scared him, I never yell the way I did and I've never seen Lip that angry with me. "Yeah, we're fine. Just go. I love you." I say, walking away from the both of them to go into the kitchen.

"Why are you dressed up?" Lip shouts from the living room. "Meeting Ian and his lawyer and that crazy bitch Geneva today. She wants him to plead guilty, she's a selfish cunt." I answer before taking a bite of my apple. "When's that?" "Now, I'm five minutes behind schedule. Fi picked him up a little while ago, she's trying to talk him into pleading insanity." "Is that the right thing?" "I think so but we've used that excuse before and Ian is manic right now so who knows what he'll do." I answer, "Well, keep me posted okay?" he asks, looking up at me from the couch, "Yeah, I will." I say bending over, buckling my heel clasp. "Hey, I'm sorry for last night." He starts. "It's whatever, Lip. I gotta go. Have a good day off." I gently pat the top of his head before leaving the house.

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"No way! He's pleading insanity and that's that!" Fiona yells at Geneva, "He can't because then our whole movement becomes about mental health!" She yells back, "And mental health is just as important. I understand your fight for LGBTQ+, I'm an ally but I'm also Ian's family and he comes before any one of you involved in that movement." I speak as calmly as I possibly can, "Can we just see what my lawyer has to say?" Ian interrupts our bantering. "I know this judge," He begins and we all face our attention towards him. "If you make him plead insanity, you are putting so many lives at risk. Kids all over the world say Ian saved him." Geneva whines, "And what about him? You want him to get locked up for 10 plus years of his life? Then what? Selfish bitch." I finally break, it's been a stressful couple of days and Ian is back on the manic train, he's come so far just for it to crumble in the hands of her. I could kill her. "Sade." Ian mutters and I huff, "He doesn't belong to you he belongs with his family." Fiona says to her, "This is bigger than family!" Geneva shouts, "Nothing is bigger than family." Fiona and I say in sync, "If you send my brother to jail for one minute longer than he needs to be in there I'm gonna torch a van with your pixie ass in it." Fiona threatens, "And I'll make sure you suffer." I add on, leaning over Fiona's shoulder to be right in Geneva's face. "Ladies, I don't need another case in a case." The lawyer says

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"Are all lesbians that dramatic?" Fiona jokes as we leave the office. "Where you going?" She turns to see Ian walking away, "Stay out of it, Fiona!" He yells and storms off. "I'll handle it. Go to work." I huff and jog after him "Ian, what the fuck?" "Sadie, go home." He says, continuing to walk fast. "Ian, what the fuck! She was trying to help you." "Let me help myself, both of you! I am old enough to do what I want and what I think is right and none of you can tell me what to do." He yells at me. "Ian, don't be a fucking idiot." I sigh and walk away back to my car to go home. He's right, nobody can tell him what to do.

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"Jesus it reeks in here." I say after the smell of thick smoke hits me, "Sorry, I've been bored out of my mind." Lip says with a lit cigarette between his lips. "Jesus." I mutter seeing the pile of several different brands of empty cigarette cartons. "Can you at least open some windows?" I ask, opening all three of the living room windows. "How'd the Ian thing go?" "I don't know." I sigh, "I wish I knew." "What does that mean?" "He's angry at everyone and he's just not having a good time, he's unmedicated." "Yeah, he was here a couple minutes ago. He was in the bathroom for a while then he dipped." He rubs his face. "He's a big boy. I need to let him handle his own shit but I just can't let go of the feeling of needing to protect him and Carl and Debs and you and Liam, god damnit. Where did he go? Did he have bags?" I begin to grow anxious, cracking my knuckles and pacing the kitchen. "Hey, calm down." Lip grabs me by both my biceps, "It's gonna be okay, you've done a great job. Your job is done, okay? It's time for Sadie to care about Sadie, it's time for all of us to care about each other and ourselves not rely on you." Lip speaks, "It's always been on you and it shouldn't have been. You didn't deserve that." "But I love caring for all of you." My lip quivers softly as I look up at him with tears in my eyes, "I love all of you so much and I want all of you to be okay." I begin to spiral and Lip pulls me into his chest, the smell of cigarettes and his cologne suffocates me. "It's okay." He consoles me. "Do you want a bath?" He asks and I shrug, pulling out of his embrace. "I don't know what I want." I mope, plopping down on the stairs. I do know what I want. Mickey back and Lip to get his shit together and love me but that won't happen. "I'm gonna start a shower for you with the fizzer things and the oils." Lip says, palming the top of my head before walking upstairs. "Ian?" Fiona calls as she walks into the house. "He's not here." Lip calls, "But, I'm assuming he's no longer ginger." Lip walks downstairs, holding a black hair dye box. "What the fuck?" I mutter, putting my head in my hands. "Bus station or train station?" Fiona asks, "Neither." Lip speaks, "What?" Fiona asks, "Fiona, he's a grown man and I know you went all Fiona on him in that meeting. Let him make his own decisions." Lip says, "Lip, he's our brother and now a fugitive. We have to help him." "He doesn't want to be helped, Fi. I'm not getting involved and I'm not letting her get anymore involved. You, me, Sade, we've all done our part for him, it's time to let him handle his own shit and you can handle your own shit." Lip says and pulls me up by my arm carefully. "Lip," I say and look at him–I need to help Ian. "No, he's a big boy." Lip says and takes me upstairs. This is going to eat me alive forever. My poor Ian. My baby, my best friend in the whole world.