The Love I Need

Chapter 48

At his mention of the emu, I just about completely lose it. Even in his most vulnerable state, he's trying to make me laugh. He's more concerned about how I'm feeling than how he's doing. I'm too overwhelmed by the realization to laugh or to even continue to cry.

Instead, I slam my mouth against his. I grip his face tightly between my hands and kiss him with everything I have in me. I can taste the salt from the combination of our tears, but it doesn't deter either of us.

Theo is kissing me back just as passionately. His hands have moved from my cheeks to rake into my hair. He uses his grip to turn my head the way he wants it for the best access to my mouth. His tongue ravishes the space like it's conquering and claiming an undiscovered land.

I feel like a selfish asshole. There have been so many signs that Theo was going through something. His strong reaction to the first time I drove with Cal... The way he asked me to come to church with him... When he prayed out loud for me and asked for strength to get through this weekend...

Cal had even mentioned before that this was a bad week. But I had been too caught up in my own shit.

At the church, Theo claimed that he'd had chances to tell me and that it was on him for not... but how could he tell me when I've been making everything about me since I got here?

Theo abruptly stops kissing me. The softest glare is on his face while he puts some space between our mouths to meet my eyes. "Emilia, stop," he scolds in a quiet voice.

"Kissing you?"

When his eyes narrow at me further, I frown back at him. "Stop what? I didn't say or do anything."

"You didn't say anything out loud but I know your brain is working a mile a minute right now." He gently taps two fingers against my temple. "I didn't tell you before because I didn't want to talk about it. I wasn't ready. There was nothing you could have done differently that would have made me ready. I'm sorry if it hurts you that I wasn't honest about this."

I quickly shake my head. "You have nothing to be sorry about. I know what it's like to not feel ready to talk about something."

A sad smile tugs at his lips. "And I know what it's like to wish someone could fully open up to you."

I glance away from his knowing eyes. "We're not making this about my shit, Theo..."

"Ahh," he says with a small nod. "Right, right. It's my bowel movements that are the subject of the day."

I roll my eyes even as a small smile sneaks onto my face, and I look back at him. "You're such a loser."

He grins at me. "And here I thought you were starting to think I was cool. Maybe even that you liked me a little."

"Pfft. Yeah, right. You're not my type."

He smirks and trails his fingers through my hair. "Yeah, no. I don't know what I was thinking... You're much too princess for me." His lips lightly brush against mine. "And you're too good-looking for me." His lips press against my forehead next. "Too..." His word hangs between us as he nuzzles his nose into my hair near my ear and breathes in deeply.

"Crazy?" I fill the word in for him with a quiet, self-deprecating laugh.

"Yeah, crazy," he agrees in a low whisper. His hands run down my sides to grip my hips, and he pulls my body snuggly against his own, before he murmurs in my ear, "Too crazy hot."

I gasp when I feel the warmth of his mouth on my ear; his beard lightly scratching against the side of my neck.

"Been driving me absolutely wild since you showed up here, Princess. I can hardly stand it."