The Love I Need

Chapter 32

A heavy arm is holding me captive against the couch. I whimper and attempt to slip free, but the strong arm only tightens around me. I try to move my legs, only to discover that they too are weighed down.

No! This can't be happening. Not again!

I struggle against the heavy weights, thrashing from side to side. "Get off of me! Leave me alone!" I throw an elbow back into the solid body behind me.

"Ooph," a tired sound of pain comes from behind me. "Milia? What—"

In my panicked state, the voice doesn't register. Not at first. But by the time it does, it's too late, and I've already thrown my elbow back into Theo's stomach again.

"Hey, hey," he speaks in a rush but keeps his voice soft while he untangles his legs from mine and pulls his arm back. "I'm sorry. I fell asleep. I—Oh!"

He tries to catch me as I fall off the couch, but his quick reflexes aren't fast enough.

He sits up and moves his feet to the ground, leaning over to offer me his hand. His movements are slow and hesitant now as if he's unsure about getting close to me again. "Emilia, I'm not going to hurt you. You're safe."

I eye his hand suspiciously. Deep down, I know I have no reason to fear him. If he had wanted to take advantage of me he would have when I was a drunken mess on his couch earlier tonight. Yet still, I can't make my body relax.

A sad expression fills his brown eyes. He averts them to the coffee table behind me and moves his hand away from me. "I'm going to get you a fresh glass of water, okay?" he offers in a gentle voice. He stands up and walks to the far side of the table to keep a greater distance between us while he retrieves the half glass of water and the bottle of whiskey.

I watch as he retreats to the kitchen and work on controlling my breath.

In. Out. In. Out.

This is what you're supposed to do when you're freaking out, isn't it? So why isn't it working?

Fuck it. I'll just take another swig of liquor.

I turn toward the empty coffee table and that's when the memories from last night flood my mind.

Theo telling me I could drink at his house. April and Cal warning him it was a bad idea. Crying on Theo. Starting to fall asleep on Theo. Theo grumbling to the bottle of whiskey as if it were out to get him...

The bottle of whiskey that he just took with him to the kitchen.

Fuck!

I spring to my feet and run toward the kitchen, hoping that I'm not already too late.

"Theo!" I scream his name while I run. "Theo, don't fucking do it!"

When I burst into the kitchen, Theo's back is toward me. His arms are out to the side with his hands braced against the edge of the counter and his head bowed forward.

"I'm sorry, Emilia. I had to. I couldn't handle it being in my face anymore."

Oh no. What have I done?

My eyes burn with threatening tears as Cal's warnings to leave Theo alone echo through my mind. It took me less than three days to come into his life and ruin things for him. The shameful truth causes the tears to spill over and my throat crackles with a sob.

Theo looks over his shoulder at me. "Milia," he says sympathetically, "Princess, it's okay." He releases the counter and looks back in front of him.

And that's when I notice the faint sounds of liquid gurgling down a drain.