My Bully ~ Tom Kaulitz

PT 32

This chapter doesn't contain much. Enjoy.

~❦︎~

Waking up from throwing up is the worst. I hate it. I feel disgusted to even do anything just because of it. It's not funny. Now my emotions are a rollercoaster. I feel nauseous, sad, mad, excited and just weird. Like my hormones are all over the place. I brushed my teeth to get the nasty smell and taste of vomit out of my mouth. Afterwards, I went downstairs and decided to just eat some cereal. Today I planned to go to the pharmacy. I am praying to god that I'm not pregnant. Some may say that's not the best thing to say, but I'm not ready. And it's going to be Tom's of course, he's the only guy I've had sex with. My first, without a condom. The sex was kind of rushed in a way, I was tired of being teased and teasing him that I got straight into the point. So I put the blame on myself if I am pregnant, but I am worried about Tom. What would Tom say? What would he think? Would he stay? If I'm being honest, I don't think he would like the idea, I think he would be too stunned to say anything, but I do think he would stay. Especially since his parents are divorced. His mom is somewhere else in Germany. He would understand the pain our child would go through, except it would be for their whole life. We just graduated as well, this is rushed. Too rushed. I'm not a full adult yet, even though I'm 18, that doesn't mean I am an adult. Well I am, just not matured in a way. I could say I am way more mature than any of the boys, but still. Am I really ready for a baby? Not really, I want to live a life. I have a life now and it's going great, and would a baby make it better? Depends. Both in my life, and Tom's life. I would love to have a baby, but not now. My life is still here, being pregnant at the age of 18 isn't probably the best. I would have to take care of the kid for the rest of my life until they grow up. I wouldn't mind having one, but sometimes I freak out thinking about the crying, pooping, and all those things. But goods come with it such as walking, talking, and more. Good and bad advantages come with it, but again, my life and Tom's. I finished up my cereal and washed the dish. I walked back upstairs, heading straight to the bathroom. I needed to take the test, I can't wait much longer. I took a shower, and changed it to some biker black shorts and a hoodie with just a bra. The hoodie was Tom's of course. I brushed my hair out, and put chapstick on. I was only going to a pharmacy, no need to please anyone. I put some slides on, grabbed my keys and phone and walked out to the car. I really hope I'm not pregnant, even though some part of me wants to be, I don't think I'm ready.

~❦︎~

"Hi! Can I get 3 pregnancy tests please?" I asked the lady. She smiled and nodded.

"Of course! The cost is $25." She scanned them. Not a bad price, but kind of expensive. I passed her the money, accepting it, I thanked her and walked out. I feel like throwing up, not just from my body feelings, but the nervousness of this situation. Please, just please make the situation okay at least.

~❦︎~

Walking back and forth in my room as the tests were almost done. I couldn't stop overthinking. Tom would leave. No he wouldn't, it's Tom. He went through a similar situation. What about Bill and the others, what would they think? Would Bill be mad or happy? Happy right? He's my best friend. Wait, but that doesn't mean anything. No it should. What would I do? Would I keep it, or put it up for adoption to keep Tom? I mean, I would never abort a baby, the baby could at least have a life with another parent who's ready and secured. But then that would just hurt my child in a way, probably thinking I didn't love them. I sighed and stared at the bathroom door. It's time. I walked in, shaking from this situation. I took a deep breath and flipped over all tests.

Positive +

Positive +

Positive +

Oh god. It's coming up again. I bent down to the toilet, vomiting. It was all just coming out. Now I understand when people say to not stress. I sat down, wiping my mouth. What do I do?

~❦︎~

I could at least text him, right? It wouldn't hurt to. Just don't say anything. I haven't talked to him since yesterday. Just stay calm.

~❦︎~

Tom ❤️‍🩹

Hellooo
how was the concert?

good

that's good
when's the next one?

i don't remember
i think next Thursday

well make sure you
get good rest ok

mhm

you feeling ok?
seem off

yea im ok
i have to go though
bye

oh bye

~❦︎~

Wasn't just me right? Maybe he's tired, I mean he just got done with a concert, and went to a club. They probably stayed out too late. It went well, I'm glad I didn't seem stupid. But now I'm dreading for them to not come home, I know this is going to ruin something, I just know it.

~☠︎︎~

Hey pookies! Honestly, it was hard to make this because people want y/n pregnant but then others didn't. But I had the plan to have her pregnant for the story. I'm sorry to anyone that I disappointed that I didn't want this, but you'll thank me later for it.

Xoxo 😘
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