Staying Alive//TWDFanFic

Forty Six

Knives and arrows are being shot at us, I saw a few of our people murdered right in front of me. Their throats were slit and I stood there stunned for a moment as one of them approached me, a knife hit them before they could get too close and someone grabbed my arm and lead me through the darkness, it took me a few moments to realize it was Daryl who was leading me. I almost fell down a couple times because he was moving too fast but I managed to gain my footing and keep up with him after a while. My mind was racing as we ran, everything around us seemed like it was going in slow motion for a moment, I saw Mark slit someones throat before he threw a knife my way, I knew he was probably trying to actually kill me if he told them I died like he said he would. I'm fucked if Leah finds out I'm still alive and worse if she finds out that I'm Daryl's wife after all that time she spent talking about their love affair to me. We were bent down so long, that when we finally stopped and stood up right, my back hurt so bad it almost knocked me out. I groaned and stretched a bit before sighing deeply, "Look, I have to tell you something." He catches his breath before finally looking at me, "What?" I take a deep breath, "Those people call themselves the Reapers, when I left Alexandria, they found me and I joined them for the weeks that I was gone." His eyes widen, "How did you escape?" I look away, "Carver, Mark, had a soft spot for me since he knew me from the sanctuary when I was with Negan, he said he'd tell them I was dead, we were put on an assignment to watch Alexandria, only they didn't know it was Alexandria. We always told them that it was a gated community with no one in or out of it, but they insisted that we watch for activity anyways." He sighed, "And this Carver guy, you trust him?" I nod and it's silent for a moment before I continue, "There's something else, the leader's name is Pope and he has a right hand man of sorts, it's Leah." His demeanor immediately tensed, "Leah?" I nod, "Yeah, she uh, had a lot to say about you but has no idea that I know you." He looks away, "So you know, everything?" I nod as the anger starts to consume me, "How could you fucking lie to me like that?" He shook his head, "I didn't want to hurt you." I shook my head and scoffed, "No, you didn't want me to know that I was the back up option, I saw your note to her Daryl, she told me everything, every single thing like how she gave you an ultimatum, her or us and turns out you fucking chose her. After all we've been through together?! Really? And the fact you had a daughter waiting around for you when you were doing this shit. You're disgusting." Daryl tried to hold my hand but I shoved him away, "No. You know what? This is your chance, fucking go to her. You chose her anyways, like you said, you belong with her." He shook his head, "Josie-" I shouted this time, "No! We don't have a daughter anymore, there's no ties here, go be with who you really want to be with, I don't care anymore." Daryl sighs, "I made a mistake, Jo. I never really would've stayed there with her, I never wanted to. I just thought-" I cut him off, "No. You're not allowed to lie to me anymore." I glare at him before stepping past him, he puts his arm out to stop me, putting his hands on my arms and holding me in place while looking into my eyes, "I was going through a rough time, dealing with Rick being gone, I didn't know what I wanted anymore and I had a lot of time to think about it. I wanted to give something else a chance in this world, I wanted you to have a chance at something different too. I know how you feel about Negan, you think I don't see it but I do, I always have. I know you weren't always pretending when you were with him in the sanctuary. I just needed time to see what I wanted and then Leah came along, she was like a mirrored version of me but you know what, it took me too long to realize that you are too but you'd never make me choose between you and my family because you are my family. I was stupid and so wrong for what I did but I can't change it, if I could go back and do it all over, I would've never left you and Beth." Her name coming from his lips felt like needles in my heart, "If she would've been in that cabin when you came back, we wouldn't even be here right now, I would've never seen you again and I can't live with knowing that you ultimately chose someone else over Beth and I." I shove his arms off and start walking.