In front of a mirror, I repeat the words over and over again. In between each time begging God to give me sight.
Please, God! I can handle it, I promise. I just want to see them! I'll be fine. I have you to protect me, and if I'm scared at first, I'll get used to it. Please!
I've been wanting for so long to see ghosts, so when a customer handed me a way to do it, I jumped at it. I've been trying to see auras too, and can at times if I'm trying, but I've been wanting to see the paranormal for as long as I can remember. Maybe then I can help them more. I've been helping many cross over and it's been exhilarating. Seeing those who I'm helping would make it easier. That, and even though it frightens me to know there are demons in my house, maybe seeing them too will help me get rid of them. I'm tired of them harassing me and not knowing if it's them or if I'm overthinking things.
Sometimes it's easy to know it's something more than paranoia, like when it's clear I'm being touched by something unseen. When I get sick and lightheaded to the point of barely being able to stand up only to be completely fine once I'm helped to my bed. Hearing my name being whispered when there is no one else around. Even worse, the nightmares I get where I'm being attacked in my sleep. Some might argue against those and even the last, but if they went through them, they would know too that they're situations with a puppet master. I'm tired of being toyed with, so maybe this will help. That and it would be cool.
My eyes fade in and out making my reflection distorted. I try harder, but no matter how long I stay patient, nothing happens. Frustrated at first, I remind myself that there is a reason it's not happening.
God has His reasons. Maybe one day it will happen, and maybe not.
I hold out on my belief that if it's meant to be, it will happen. It could just be the wrong time, I need to grow stronger, or simply that it's not meant to be. Whatever the reason, there's no point in stressing over it. Until then, or never, I'll find other ways to fight my spiritual battles.
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The Past Awakened (Distorted reality book 1)
Mystery / Thriller*Warning, topics of mental illness and trauma are brought up in this novel.* Living a calm life after years of struggling, Maddy meets two new gentlemen that shift things in her world. Issues she tried hard to put behind her begin to pop back into h...
