Ishq | (complete)

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 ❝agar fidaa na hote tou fanaah hote
wo shakhs tha din ke ujaalon jaisa❞

They say your fate is written in the creases of you hands, log apni qismat hathon ki lakeeron mei likhwa ke paida hotey hai. May be her hands were cursed. In that moment her hands shook around the crayons when the Sister came in and dropped the message for her that Martin sent. Her husband sold the orphanage. In that moment it was as if the roof of the orphanage had fallen and torn through her back, piercing her delicate skin. Where are the orphanage papers, Laila? She couldn't hear the innocent chatter of the kids, only those words echoed over and over, but something in her heart pulled her together.

He wouldn't do that to her. He would sell his soul but he wouldn't hurt her like that. That voice within her pushed through the chaos. Shehryar Ali would never ever betray her. Maybe she was crazy, or maybe she had completely lost her senses because the Sister had shown her photos, but her heart couldn't fall for it. This man had lost his entire world for her. He nearly died for her. She held on to that memories. He loved her, beyond words, beyond the norms, and beyond the love she held for him. So she held on to that trust.

Wasn't that just a sad reality of life. The choice she made would eventually decide her fate. Two faces of the same coin, love, hate, betrayal, trust. She hoped that this one time her coin was lucky and that it would flip in her favor. She was choosing to trust the man she married and she prayed that he wouldn't betray her because if he ever did, she didn't think she would be able to even breathe.

So she held on to her heart and went home and when he returned home Laila knew he had done something but those eyes didn't lie. His eyes weren't guilty, they were only full of fear. As if he was standing on the cliff, one graze of wind and he'd fall to his death. Crossing the vast living room, he wrapped his arms around her and buried his face in her hair.

"Shehryar..." She coiled her arms around him as he held on to her.

"I'm tired, Laila." He whispered in to her hair. "And I'm terrified."

Please tell me you didn't sell the orphanage, please. She tightened her arms around him, hoping her embrace would prevent them from falling apart.

"What happened?"

"I gambled and I know Allah doesn't like gambling, but I had no choice." He pulled back, cupping her face with his cold arms as she looked in his red eyes, filled with unshed tears. "Allah probably listens more to you right?"

"He listens to all of us." She traced his trembling arms, curling her hands around his wrists to extend the little warmth she had.

"Can you please pray to him to be on our side. To save me this one last time because if not I think it would destroy me and..." you

He never finished that sentence but she heard it loud and clear. She was terrified to her bones. Her heart seemed to be sitting on the edge of a sword. One slight touch and it would slice in half but when she looked into his eyes. She couldn't voice her fear. This man had been through destruction over and over. So much loss that he couldn't even believe anything would ever go right for him. God couldn't be cruel to him, not after all the sacrifices he had made.

"Allah is on our side. There is no way Allah will fail us." She refused to believe they would fail, just like she refused to believe he betrayed her. So she never brought up the orphanage. That orphanage was involved somewhere in all this but she couldn't do this to him, not when he was this vulnerable. If he believed she didn't know, then she'd let him live with that. Maybe she was insane in others' eyes, but she just couldn't accept that he'd ever do something to risk her. "Do you want to pray with me?"