Feeling Like Crap-Tika

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As I watch him walk away quickly I can only stare at the meadow floor. When I saw it at first I thought it was the most beautiful place that I have ever seen. The air was sweet because of the flowers and they were so soft as I ran my hands along him. Now as I stare at the meadow floor, it feels almost as if it is now tarnished. The air now has a bitterness to the sweet aroma.

With a deep breath I finally take my eyes from the floor and look around. The man, Maximus, who is able to disappear just looks at me. I can't help my eyes that flicker to his bare upper body. Seeing that he is scarred I quickly look away as I wonder what to do next. Xander told him to take me back to where I would be staying. I guess we will do that now.

"Uh, why don't you just follow me" he says after clearing his throat. He puts his back to me as he takes the same exit as Xander before and I lift my feet to follow him as I think. How could he just talk to me like that? Did he honestly expect me just to handle all of this so easily? I'm still having trouble trying to accept the reality of my situation.

Just yesterday I was only worried about surviving another day as myself. To keep the only thing I had left. To protect myself from the guards in the prison. I had no idea that they would be shipping me off to become the breeding partner of one of these....these things. Do they even have the same anatomy that we do? Shaking my head I try to clear it of these thoughts but it's no use.

For some reason after our conversation I feel guilty. Like I just messed up something momentous. He may not have thought about killing me before but he is probably considering it now that I have refused him. One thing that I have learned during my time in prison is that men hate to be refused. Most of them will just try to take it anyway and not care how it affects you.

"We heading to the clinic or are we taking you to the cabin?" he ask me as he continue to walk ahead of me. He ask the question nonchalantly but I can tell from his tone that he is angry. I haven't even said anything to him or done anything to him. If he has something to say then he might as well say it. Deciding that I don't want to provoke him too much because I know what he is, I take the easier option.

"What is it that you think I should do?" I ask him as I stop walking. He turns to face me with an arrogant smirk on his face as he appraises me. The look he gives me causes chills to run down my spine and I know that I won't like what he has to say.

"Look lady, I'm not one for the touchy feely shit, feel me. So, I'm going to give it to you straight. This thing you got with him, it aint going to be all cup cake and rainbows. It's the real deal. Neither one of you want it. I get it. I been there too. But here you are. So why not at least give it a shot?" he says surprising me.

He doesn't wait for an answer as he turns to continue walking. My feet move automatically as my mind races once more. if I were to give it a shot, then I really don't have anything to lose. The worst that could happen by giving it a shot is that it doesn't work. On the other hand if I don't give it a shot, would I regret it. This is the big thing that seems to be bothering me apparently.

I frown when we walk past the other prisoners that are all sitting outside of a cabin. As we walk by I can't help but to count to make sure everyone is still there. Yup, still nine people. We round the next bend and the clinic comes into view. I really would prefer staying in one of the cabins so that I have easier access to being outside. However, I guess the clinic would be fine and I won't have to share my room with another.

When the clinic comes closer I automatically turn to head towards the door I had exited before. Before I can reach the floor his voice stops me in my tracks. "We have changed your accommodation since you have been matched with someone. It's just a few more houses ahead. Someone has already been given instructions to bring you food and some more clothes to wear" he says still not looking back.

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