You Changed Me | Evan Buckley (9-1-1) [Book 1]

6: Realizations

It's been 4 days since I cheated on Eddie. I still don't know why I did it. I love him, not Buck. On the other hand, Buck has been so patient with me. He checks on me multiple times a day and brings me and Brie food for lunch. Cap decided he was going to let us back to work, but we had to go in a week apart. Eddie went in the day after everything went down. Buck will be next, then me. 

Eddie still wants us to take time apart, but he still checks in on Brie as if she's his daughter and Brie has gotten to see a couple times. 

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I was in my bed again for the 4th day straight, Buck and Eddie have been taking Brielle to and from school, not knowing the other is also helping. I just wanted to give Eddie a tight hug. I missed him, but then on the other hand I'm experiencing things and feelings with Buck that I didn't experience with Eddie. 

My phone went off pulling me out of my thoughts. 

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Buckley <3

How's my girl this fine day?

Fine

What are your plans for today?

Laying in bed all day

Whyyyy?? Let me come over?

Fine I guess

Cheer up Lis I miss seeing your gorgeous smile

yeah I miss it too

So let me make you smile todayyy

I'm taking you out on our first official date, be ready in 20

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I smiled at my phone, Buck always knew how to cheer me up. I got up from my bed and got ready. I must've gone through 5 or 6 outfits before just settling on a LAFD hoodie and shorts. Almost in perfect time, my doorbell rang

I opened the door "hey beautiful" Buck smiled wrapping his arms around my waist. It made my heart flutter. "Where are we going?" I questioned. "Don't worry about it babe" he grabbed my hand leading me out to his jeep

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A somewhat short car ride later we arrived at the pier.

"Are you excited?" Buck asked as I got out of the car. I nodded, being on a date with him felt so wrong. Eddie and I are supposed to be taking time apart to work on ourselves to better our relationship. Not for me to go out on a date with the man I cheated on him with. 

We walked the pier, at some point Buck began to hold my hand. It felt different being with Buck. I felt free and like I could just enjoy being young. With Eddie he's ready to settle down and be a family only type relationship, which is nice, but I'm 22 and I want to embrace my youth. 

We walked past a game where a big cow plush was the prize, "Buck" I looked at him seriously. "Yes babe?" "Can you win me that big cow?" I smiled slightly. 

Buck took the challenge and won it on the first try. "You have a good husband young lady, he's a keeper" the older woman running the game said to me as she handed me the stuffed animal. "Oh we're no-" I began to speak before Buck cut me off "If you think she's lucky, you should see how lucky I am to have married her" he said with the biggest smile on his face. 

Usually something like that would make me feel awkward and uncomfortable, but I started to think about how being married to Buck would be like. 

As we walked away, a smile grew on my face. "There it is" Buck said looking at me "What?" I asked, not knowing what he was talking about. "That gorgeous smile of yours"

Every time Buck complimented my smile, my heart would feel warm and happy. Eddie never said anything about my smile. All his compliments were about my body and how nice I looked wearing tight clothes or no clothes. 

The thoughts of what Eddie liked about me ran through my head all day, making me semi-aware of my surroundings. 

Buck walked us back to the car so I could make it home in time for Eddie to drop off Brie. 

"He only likes my body" I blurted out as Buck was driving. "Alissa what are you talking about?" He asked me, glancing over at me. "He only wanted me for sex, he only cared about my body" I kept saying it over and over again not realizing the tears running down my face

"Hey Alissa babe it's okay I'm here" Buck pulled over and hugged me tightly as I started to cry harder. My face was bright red and I started to feel lightheaded. 

"Breathe slowly Lis" Buck said calmly while rubbing my back. "It's all okay" I started to calm down a little. 

I needed to talk to Eddie. I needed to know what he liked about me. "Please take me home" I said quietly. 

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I walked into my house and sat on the couch waiting for Eddie to get here with Brie. I was feeling anxious. I loved him, but I was sure he loved me for all the wrong reasons. 

I heard a knock on the door followed by Brielle and Eddie walking in. "Momma!!" Brie smiled running over and giving me a hug. "How was school today princess?" I asked, knowing I was going to get a long, time consuming answer. I was pushing off talking to Eddie. 

Brie finished telling me about her day when Eddie spoke up "Bye bug I'll see you in the morning" Brie ran over to give him a hug. "Eddie we need to talk outside" I said getting up. 

I told Brielle to start on her homework then Eddie and I went outside, sitting on the front porch steps. 

"What's this about Alissa? I don't want to talk about you being a cheater" he said shaking his head. "What did you like about me?" I said not being able to hold it in anymore. He looked at me. 

"Well Alissa, I love so much about you" he avoided the direct question. "Specifically what?" I pressed. "You have an amazing body, you're one hell of a woman in the bed, do I need to continue?"

I knew it. Everything I felt was true. Where was the 'your eyes' or 'your beautiful smile' or anything about me as a person. Eddie made me believe he wanted me for the person I am. He just wanted my body. 

I stood up. "We no longer need time apart" I said. "I still need time to heal"

"No Edmundo you aren't understanding, we are not together anymore" I rolled my eyes. "Since when?" he looked confused, yet also looked smug. 

"Since right now all you want is sex" I walked in my home slamming the door shut. 

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(A/N) Do y'all think this is the end of Alissa and Eddie?? I guess we will find out together LMFAO

But I seriously hope you guys are enjoying the book so far!! In the next few parts I'll be writing out more calls as Alissa will be back at work. Some will be made up and some will be from the show. 

ALSO before I forget. The book isn't going to be aligning with the show at some points, but please bare with it!!