Can I please be happy? (Phan)

Pink butterfly sitting on a marshmallow

{Phil's POV}

"Phil baby, are you mad at me?" Dan asked as I was searching for the keys to get into the flat. I was refusing to talk to him in public about what he did to make me mad, all I did was plaster on a fake smile and ask him what he's talking about every time he asks why I am not genuinely smiling.

"I still don't know what you are talking about." I said a finally found the right key. I bolted in the door and took my coat off. Dan went just as fast and grabbed my hand dragging me to the couch to sit me down. I am guessing he didn't mean to grab me as hard as he did because my hand kind of hurts now.

"Okay tell me." He said looking directly into my eyes. He looked slightly mad and frustrated. His look had some sort of urgency in it. It almost looked like he would ring my neck if I waited any longer.

"You know darn well what you did." My words seemed to hit him like a ton of bricks. You see, that's what you get when you're quiet and nice to people. You say something powerful and everyone listens and takes it even if it wouldn't be powerful from anyone else.

He was completely silent. His face was pale and he couldn't look at me. I've never seen him like this. I started wonder if he's okay. I only said darn. It isn't that bad. I've cursed in front of him before. He's seen me being the opposite of innocent.

"It was just a bag of-" I stopped him before he could continue.

"Save it." My tone was a little bit harsh, but he knew that he deserved it.

I guess I should explain exactly what happened. Maybe it would also help me to forgive him for making a fool of himself.

I'll start off my saying that it isn't just one thing that is making me mad. It is multiple things.

It all started in the Starbucks. We found that pj and Chris were there too. It seems like they are always there for some reason. It's like they live there or something.

Anyway, we were all sitting and talking about who knows what and Dan had nothing but hearts in his eyes. I guess he had completely disregarded the fact that he was the one who said that we can't act all couple-like in public. I knew that we were getting stared at and I felt uncomfortable. It was like they could see right through his eyes that were half slowly undressing me and half admiring me in his mind.

I tried my best to hint to him that he was staring just a little bit too much, but he wasn't listening. It almost seemed like he knew yet he kept going. I even sent him a text that read "you should stop looking at me like that. Look at Pj or someone else." But he hardly responded. He just said that he couldn't help it. He said I looked too good to pass up any opportunity to look.

I don't think he understands that now just isn't the time. You can't be romantic like this in public if you are anything but straight. I even heard him say that to me. So when he quickly kissed my cheek after Pj and Chris left, I froze even though I wasn't surprised by the result.

One of the ladies in the establishment rose from her seat clutching her child's hand and she stomped toward the door. As she walked, she muttered things about how gross we were and how her child didn't need that in his brain. She said she didn't want her child to be gay like us. I was fine with letting it go, but Dan sure wasn't going to have it so he slammed his hand down on the table and quickly stood up.

I didn't like where is was going in the first place. Dan isn't intimidating and he knows it. But that doesn't mean that is doesn't still scare me when he yells and I know that that's what's coming.

She yelled at us. She called us both worthless and she called us anything offensive she could think of that also made it seem like we don't belong in public. Dan fought back and I tried to tell him not to.