SMASHED: Reiner Braun X Reader

REINER BRAUN X READER

Chapter XVIII

"(Y/N), how are you?" Commander Smith's voice asked making you smile for a moment.

Of course you're not fine. You might look like you are, but deep inside you're not. Your physical body might heal but the wound inside your heart is still bleeding.

"I'm feeling fine, Commander." You stated, but deep down you know you aren't.

"About Braun—"

"Whatever you see or hear in the past, please forget it, Commander. It's... Reiner... he's..." You can't continue your words as you feel your breathing tightened for some reason, "I don't want to talk about him."

Please, not now. I'm not ready.

"I understand," Commander Smith replied, "We will conduct a long term mission and it has to do something about Braun and his country. I hope your feelings won't get in the way of your decisions, (Y/N)."

You remained silent. It's been months and you have fully recovered from what happened to you, but the emotional burden still exists in your heart.

"I need to fulfill my task as a soldier, Commander." You muttered.

"Do you still love him?" Erwin asked and it makes you clench your fist.

Yes. I do.

"I— please let's not talk about Reiner," You averted your gaze as the clench in your fist tightened. You don't want to disappoint Commander Smith.

It's illogical to love someone who already hurt you and you know that more than anyone else.

But emotions don't think— and your heart is always illogical.

"Keep in mind that once a person hurt you, he can change but there's no guarantee that he won't hurt you again."

You nodded and tried to ignore a pang of pain that fills your system.

There's no guarantee that he won't hurt you again.

"Commander," You whispered, "C-can we talk about the long term plan? We have to plot a strategy as early as possible."

Erwin nodded as you sit in the chair in front of him.

"Five months ago, you are still unconscious at that time, we ended up going Jaeger's basement in which his father stated that there's an important truth hidden in that place. Upon investigating further, we found out that there are humans outside the wall— and the titans are humans before turning into one. They are the Marleyans. And Reiner..."

"He's one of them," You continue in a low tone.